Tips for controlling nerves?!

[Seed]

I'm doing something publicly tomorrow, to kick start my LP.

I am not an extrovert by any means and my stomach is dancing and I am not calm at all!

It's important that I do stay calm in order to come across well... anyone got any tips? Apart from the obvious, deep breathing, staying mindful etc...

I am trying but mind's gone mental right now...  Nerves are close to excitement right??? I am just VERY 'excited!?!?!' 

[Seed]

I have a red wine in hand right now... bad move I know! But it's settling me a bit.. 'and breath............'

[starsofclay]

Do you use affirmations? You could use one for nervousness, confidence, etc. Here's one I found that sounds pretty good :

 

[Arman]

Take it from someone who is extroverted and comfortable in front of crowds: unless you've done it plenty of times before, it is always nerve-racking for everyone the day or week before, so you're not alone, and you shouldn't be concerned about being anxious. Being calm when performing helps, but it isn't necessary. 

My suggestion is you mentally go through the worst case scenario.

"What's the worse thing that could happen?"

"And how could it get even worse?"

"And even worse still?"

and look at them, examine them, and accept them. Allow the franetic buzzing of fear to come up and just be with it to release some of that reservoir. Looking at your specific fears and accepting them will help.

And then accept that it'll likely still be scary despite all your best efforts to deal with the emotions and energy. That's okay!

Edited March 4, 2018 by Arman

[Seed]

Thank you both..

 @Arman - my mind won't keep still enough to do any of that, although I have done weeks and days ago when I felt the need and definitely helps! Night before is a 'no go' though, I just have to let myself go a bit crazy in the lead up to all public events and then I am always fine when it happens!

@starsofclay when's best to listen to that? Just before bed? Do I have to say  it with him?

 

 

 

 

[Arman]

18 minutes ago, Seed said:

Thank you both..

 @Arman - my mind won't keep still enough to do any of that, although I have done weeks and days ago when I felt the need and definitely helps! Night before is a 'no go' though, I just have to let myself go a bit crazy in the lead up to all public events and then I am always fine when it happens!

@starsofclay when's best to listen to that? Just before bed? Do I have to say  it with him

In that case, statsofclay reminded me with their video of how easy EFT can be for this stuff:

 

[starsofclay]

@Seed you can meditate to it, either ignoring it and letting it come in subliminally, or listening, repeating in head or out loud, or visualize yourself agreeing with the statements being made. Can be listened to at anytime, and they even make ones that are 8 hour tracks with sleeping music to listen to while sleeping. 

[Seed]

Thanks so much @starsofclay @Arman

Really helpful stuff.. :-) 

[Nahm]

@Seed I just remember that nobody actually gives a shit what I think or have to say about anything. It’s all experienced through relativity to the other person (s).  Takes the “thinking” of “pressure” out if it, and get’s my focus back on enjoying the experience for myself.

Focusing on breathing from the stomach helps. Exercising first thing that morning (and every morning) helps burn off the adrenaline and cortisol (the stress cocktail), those chemicals won’t even be there if you tried to get stressed. Not eating any sugar for a day or two helps. 

When I sing & play guiatar in front of a room full of people, I’m aware I’m actually alone, and that ‘works’ best, might be timely here for you though. It’s just an experience happening. I’m not a big deal. It doesn’t matter if it’s the best I’ve ever played, or if I completely fuck it up. I know this, cause I have completely fucked it up, and guess what happened....nothing. 

Try to become aware that you’ve attached your ‘life purpose’ size to this. It’s not. It’s one moment at a time, exactly like this moment right now. See, no big deal.

[Seed]

Thank you @Nahm ... this nearly makes me cry.

I do believe I am attaching 'the LP' on to this, making it such a MASSIVE deal.... usually I think it would be a little bit panicky but nowhere nearly like I am now...

This is the first public thing I have ever done for my LP apart from online marketing and social media, which is always easy as your hiding behind a screen. 

I know tomorrow I will be fine when it's all done and be thinking 'why the hell did I make such a big deal'

ANticpation is always the worst!

Thank you for your help... and don't wish me luck, as what will be, will be, and will be exactly as it should be... 

 

 

 

[Nahm]

@Seed yeah! you got it. have fun!! nothing serious happenin. 

[Leo Gura]

Sedona Method is good for that.

Also, positive visualizations.

[Seed]

Thank you !!! Now let’s just hope my daughter doesn’t wake up in the night... hadn’t yet considered that one !!! ??? 

Sweet dreams everyone...

xxxx

Edited March 4, 2018 by Seed