6 months to awaken !

[Shin]

3 minutes ago, Ether said:

?

Something only one person can understand but me.

[Shin]

I did everything I could.

I fear it's not enough though.

I'm crying as of now and it just doesn't want to stop.

I can't sleep either, how could I ?

How can I live peacefully knowing that at any moment something horrible might happen, totally out of my control, I CAN'T DO SHIT !!!!!!!!!!!

The only thing left is to pray, I have to rely on faith only this time.

Probably one of the most difficult thing I'll have to endure in this life, and I'm totally POWERLESS !!!!!!!!!!!

I would do anything for this to change ...

If you hear me god, my true me, the one that I think I can't reach now, plz do something,

Kill me if you must, I don't care at this point ...

But don't let what I know is probably going to happen to actually come true ...

I'll do whatever you tell me to do, 

I FUCKING BEG OF YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Edited March 11, 2018 by Shin

[sarapr]

4 hours ago, Shin said:

I did everything I could.

I fear it's not enough though.

I'm crying as of now and it just doesn't want to stop.

I can't sleep either, how could I ?

How can I live peacefully knowing that at any moment something horrible might happen, totally out of my control, I CAN'T DO SHIT !!!!!!!!!!!

The only thing left is to pray, I have to rely on faith only this time.

Probably one of the most difficult thing I'll have to endure in this life, and I'm totally POWERLESS !!!!!!!!!!!

I would do anything for this to change ...

If you hear me god, my true me, the one that I think I can't reach now, plz do something,

Kill me if you must, I don't care at this point ...

But don't let what I know is probably going to happen to actually come true ...

I'll do whatever you tell me to do, 

I FUCKING BEG OF YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

What are you talking about? If you can say 

[Shin]

1 hour ago, sarapr said:

What are you talking about? If you can say 

No I can't for now.

Maybe in a month or so.

[Shin]

On 06/03/2018 at 1:19 AM, Shin said:

Habit to quit this month: PIzzas/Fast-foods/soda/large meal.

Habit to create this month: 2 hours meditation/1 hour self-enquiry

 

• Did I eat shit ? 3 sip of a soda.
• Did I read today ? Yes
• Did I meditated 2 hours ? Yes
• Did I self-enquire for 1 hour ? Yes
• Did I wasted my fluids for a few minutes of pleasure ? No (15 days in a row).

What else ?

Stretching + workoutx4

Don't remember, was a daaaark day.

Quote

 

 

On 10/03/2018 at 0:55 AM, Shin said:

 

 

Edited March 12, 2018 by Shin

[Shin]

On 06/03/2018 at 1:19 AM, Shin said:

Habit to quit this month: PIzzas/Fast-foods/soda/large meal.

Habit to create this month: 2 hours meditation/1 hour self-enquiry

 

• Did I eat shit ? No
• Did I read today ? Yes
• Did I meditated 2 hours ? Yes
• Did I self-enquire for 1 hour ? Yes
• Did I wasted my fluids for a few minutes of pleasure ? No (16 days in a row).

 

What else did I do ?

Stretching, workoutx2

One hour walking meditation (then it started to rain )

Some useful posting on AC.

English accent exercice for 20/30 minutes (this is funny lol)

 

 

On 10/03/2018 at 0:55 AM, Shin said:

 

 

Edited March 12, 2018 by Shin

[Shin]

On 10/03/2018 at 0:55 AM, Shin said:

 

Shouldn't do the 3 hours of intense consciousness in a row, not only there is massive resistance, but doing sel-inquiry at night when it's usually the time when pI'm the less alert is not a good idea.

Need to do self-inquiry in the morning, because at this moment I'm not that sad about you know what, way easier to concentrate.