Hope >>>> Inquire Within.

[Kelley White]

For those with serious mental health diagnosis the world can feel like an alienating place.

I would like to share with you one of my favorite Ted Talks... I really resonated with her journey and I always find this inspirational.

All I Ever Needed to Know I Learned in the Mental Hospital

http://momastery.com/blog/2013/06/05/everything-i-ever-needed-to-know-i-learned-in-the-mental-hospital/

 

[Guest]

Thank you Kelley

[Kelley White]

Hi @The Son You are welcome.

[Nathalie]

@Kelley White hi Kelley, i watched that video because i thought i'll understand how people with serious psychic problems see the world in order to eventually be able to find a way to help.. Well, if i understand it rightly, you can summerise her statement like this:

Once you are in this state, you see the world as an evil and nasty place where you want to escape from.. right? Her idea is you than have to go a scary way and meet and acknowledge your feelings so everything will be allright..

I'm not sure, but i don't think it would motivate me..?

I mean, what's the point ? How did it resonate with you? Could you explain it?

I also miss a little the fact that everyone of us has to be - or become - responsible of our live, that there is no bad world outside.. It's only an interpretation, a reflection of our thoughts isn't it?

[Kelley White]

21 hours ago, MartineF said:

hi Kelley, i watched that video because i thought I'll understand how people with serious psychic problems see the world in order to eventually be able to find a way to help..

Hi!  @ MartineF, nice to meet you.  Thank you for taking the time to watch the video.   Great questions, thank you for asking them.

My first thought would be I wonder if you view all serious mental illnesses/psychiatric problems as one broad category?   Each being sees the world differently with or without a mental illness of a serious or non serious nature.

21 hours ago, MartineF said:

Once you are in this state, you see the world as an evil and nasty place where you want to escape from.. right?

I think many folks have endured severe trauma and cannot function under the illusion of denial that the world is fair, kind, or without danger.

I found her larger points to be:

• Facing your fears
• Have the courage to be vulnerable
• Have the courage to face your shame
• Have the courage to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart
• Making the unknown known is what is important
• When you feel like a loser you can make super hero capes to cover your real vulnerable self so you avoid pain, or feeling much at all.
• People with intense emotions often feel that they are to minimize or not be honest about their actual emotions.  

I've voluntarily been in a mental hospital.  We took off our capes, we told the raw truth of our pain and our flaws, we created, we self examined, we learned meditation and we healed.

21 hours ago, MartineF said:

Her idea is you than have to go a scary way and meet and acknowledge your feelings so everything will be alright..

Yes, you have to face the things that you are fearful of, or ashamed of the most and acknowledge your feelings as a part of the healing process based upon my direct experience.   Yes sometimes its scary. 

21 hours ago, MartineF said:

I also miss a little the fact that everyone of us has to be - or become - responsible of our live, that there is no bad world outside.

Yes, we have to be 100% responsible for our lives.  Sometimes that means being responsible for how we react to a traumatic event.   Recovery can take time and require support/help.

There is no bad world outside?  That right there I have to disagree with. 

Now on the esoteric level I appreciate one can have a philosophical discussion that good and evil are subjective and evil has its own path and positive consequence can result from a negative act; etc.

On the pragmatic level if you have someone cause you serious protracted physical or emotional harm you may feel at that time that there is bad in the world as you have fallen victim to a painful sensation which you attributed to the word we know as bad. 

(Ie: if I physically assault you I suspect you will perceive that as bad, quite literally.)

I suspect the physical sensation of pain will leave  room for doubt you would initially choose in the now to view the act as "good" unless you are a masochist?  I don't know.  What do you think? 

If someone assaults you is that good?  Is it neutral?  Is the damage to your  physical body all merely a perception of your mind? What do you think?  

 

[Nathalie]

Thank you for the time you spend answering me

 

3 hours ago, Kelley White said:

I wonder if you view all serious mental illnesses/psychiatric problems as one broad category?   Each being sees the world differently with or without a mental illness of a serious or non serious nature.

No i don't

But my impression is that a lot of mental illnesses are due to any hurts, which can be lessen with love and help to careful openness. Besides there are a lot of people which even don't know that they are ill (inclding myself perhaps ?)

3 hours ago, Kelley White said:

if I physically assault you I suspect you will perceive that as bad, quite literally

Sure, i wouldn't like it .

Even though i can't imagine that i would thing the world is bad, even not that you are bad.. I rembember a few situations, i don't realy want to expose here, which i really didn't appreciate at all, either.. But i don't remember that i had those kind of thoughts.. Only: how can i come out of this?? No judgement in it, right?

So this may be a question of mentality.. Don't know..

The perception of the pain can lead you to grow, as deeper the pain as higher you can grow.. (Or fall deep, if you don't find a way out?)

Hope you don't think i see it superficially, i actually don't, i just don't know how i can share a certain strongness to others.. that's all.. But in this field, i feel helpless..

I wish you the best

 

[Kelley White]

14 hours ago, MartineF said:

Thank you for the time you spend answering me

@MartineF You are very welcome, thank you for asking.  It was nice that someone expressed an interest.  

14 hours ago, MartineF said:

But my impression is that a lot of mental illnesses are due to any hurts, which can be lessen with love and help to careful openness. Besides there are a lot of people which even don't know that they are ill (including myself perhaps ?)

I suspect your impression is correct that many mental illnesses are due to traumas.  (hurts)  Can you throw enough love at a hurt to repair it always?  In my experience no.   Sometimes love is not enough to solve the problem.  In other instances, love is very healing and does contribute to overall wellness in conjunction with honest self inquiry.

Sometimes there are other factors that play into the illness and they are organic or physiological and not so easily "managed."

HAHAHA  The whole who is ill thing?  I often wonder that one myself? 

14 hours ago, MartineF said:

Even though i can't imagine that i would thing the world is bad, even not that you are bad.. I remember a few situations, i don't really want to expose here, which i really didn't appreciate at all, either.. But i don't remember that i had those kind of thoughts.. Only: how can i come out of this?? No judgement in it, right?

So this may be a question of mentality.. Don't know..

I think its more like feeling the world is an unsafe place. 

14 hours ago, MartineF said:

The perception of the pain can lead you to grow, as deeper the pain as higher you can grow.. (Or fall deep, if you don't find a way out?)

I think it can do either its a matter of degree and focus?  If I err and feel pain  and make a correction to avoid incurring the same pain in the future that would be growth.  

14 hours ago, MartineF said:

Hope you don't think i see it superficially, i actually don't, i just don't know how i can share a certain strongness to others.. that's all.. But in this field, i feel helpless..

I did  not think that you saw the topic superficially, I felt your question was sincere and many of your points are valid.   If by strongness you mean the validation of acknowledging one's own strengths versus focusing on one's painful mistakes, I think you conveyed that quite well. 

Thank you, and I wish you the best as well. 

[Key Elements]

@Kelley White

This is a great video. Thanks for sharing. I have seen it before. I like the part when she said that we all need to be allowed to be honest - that includes everyone, no matter who you are.

Let me just share with you a part of my work involves teaching children. From very young, children are labelled. For example, if a child decides to share his/her travels abroad to X, Y, or Z countries, the child is labeled as "showing off." If a child just stays home throughout summer, the other kids tease him/her. I always like to think that we shouldn't label anyone and everyone is just another human being after all and should be put on the same plain. 

I allow the children who travel to share openly and honestly. Nothing is wrong with that. It is awesome. I tell the children who stay home that there are lots of activities and games to play over the summer - that the whole apartment or house could be converted into a hide & seek birthday party.

There are always 2 different ways of looking at things - why do we need to label and hide everything? 

[Kelley White]

On 3/19/2016 at 11:07 AM, Key Elements said:

why do we need to label and hide everything? 

@Key Elements  I honestly do not know.  My observation is that it is a function of language and communication?  We label to identify; we hide so we can associate through identification?   Labels allow for common definitions to work from?  Where I am at currently now.   

That said...why do some hide?  Cultural morality paradigms, self judgement, fear of external judgement, so many reasons.    I've really been spending more time of late just reading about morality itself and then meditating and losing all the stories related to morality to see what remains.  

I find there are multiple ways of viewing, the focus which I  seem to returns to is which sight allows for the highest and best probable outcome for the most individuals?   Nash's law of governing dynamics still seems to be what is; while other models appear to be what is imagined.

On 3/19/2016 at 11:07 AM, Key Elements said:

Let me just share with you a part of my work involves teaching children. From very young, children are labelled. For example, if a child decides to share his/her travels abroad to X, Y, or Z countries, the child is labeled as "showing off."

I was this kid.  I so appreciate what this kid goes through.   I was the kid bringing Christmas Cards from the Prince and Princess of Luxembourg to show and tell.   My parents thought whatever...I had no idea it was showing off it was my normal.  

On 3/19/2016 at 11:07 AM, Key Elements said:

If a child just stays home throughout summer, the other kids tease him/her.

In turn as a single mother, my kids often had to stay home unless I got creative or they were invited to go places with others.  I was fortunate enough to be creative and they were fortunate enough  to be invited often since they were well mannered and appreciative.   Quite often though they were the poorer kids in wealthier school districts being teased for being poor.  As a mom that hurt pretty badly to see my kids go through after what I had been through as a kid.   I wanted to spare them that.

On 3/19/2016 at 11:07 AM, Key Elements said:

I always like to think that we shouldn't label anyone and everyone is just another human being after all and should be put on the same plain. 

Many people don't understand my reluctance to be harshly critical of others.  I've learned by being around very numerous subcultures and those with abundance as well as those without that we are all just humans trying to do the best we can with the understanding we have in the moment to do the best with what life throws at us with the skill set we possess.   I've seen as much pain and loss in mansions as I have in ghettos and I've seen as much love and generosity in ghettos as I've seen in mansions.  Ultimately... all people; flaws and wonders all.   Some we can abide near, some we cannot, but ultimately we all are just experiencing different things in different ways and processing them within the limitations of the language we possess to co create a common experiential framework of understanding.   The best understanding I have in this moment.