Zendigger

[Preety_India]

A 25

Today wasn't a good day but anyway tried to be a little more active than usual. Felt very sluggish and just dragged through. 

[Preety_India]

Other healthier ways to develop or work on self esteem. Only if I had known  better. 

[Preety_India]

Self acceptance is the key 

The statement that I need to repeat to myself :

I didn't do anything wrong to deserve this at all. It's life that is unfair and that's completely fine. I deserve all the happiness. I don't need to be special to deserve anything. If anything bad happened to me it wasn't my fault and I did nothing to deserve it. I deserve better than what I have and what I have been given. I should be happy and try to be happy in all other ways I can. I need to be positive. I should give myself more love in whatever ways I can even if I felt I'm not worthy of something or I didn't deserve it. The burden of guilt doesn't lie on me but on circumstances that I didn't choose on my own. I am not unworthy of anything at all in fact I deserve more when I'm weak. I'm not a loser or someone who is undeserving but someone who needs help assistance and better things or resources to deal with my situation. I have my flaws just like anyone else but that doesn't mean I am undeserving or unfit. It means I just need more. I did everything to deserve much better and much more than what I got in return. I should learn to accept and embrace my flaws and embrace parts of me that I can't change. I should work on those aspects of my character and nature that I can change. It's fine to be flawed because perfection is an illusion. I should work on those things that do not qualify for judgement and bypass attention. There are many beautiful things. I should not confine myself to what the world believes defines a person. I should embrace those parts of me that don't exist and improve those that exist. I can always change spiritually even if not physically. I should not keep pitying and fretting over stuff about myself that I can't change but rather work on those that can be improved, resolved and changed and not let it get stymied because of the stuff that can't be changed. 

Edited March 6, 2018 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Alternative ways to develop self esteem and ways to deal with self insufficiency. 

Liberation from self guilt and regret. 

I deserve all of this even if I feel I don't have something... 

1.. I deserve all of this even if........ Fill in the blanks... 

2..I deserve all of this even if........ Fill in the blanks... 

 

3.....I deserve all of this even if........ Fill in the blanks... 

4..I deserve all of this even if........ Fill in the blanks... 

5..I deserve all of this even if........ Fill in the blanks... 

6...I deserve all of this even if........ Fill in the blanks... 

7..I deserve all of this even if........ Fill in the blanks... 

[Preety_India]

Illusory self esteem workout 

Imagining that I already have what I feel is lacking in me. 

(the spirit works on matter) 

I'm healthy 

I'm good. 

Imagining that I'm already enjoying all that I would have loved to have or dreamed of having, enjoying and how I would have wanted it to be. 

This is an important visual psychological experiment. Results will be in weeks. 

 

[Preety_India]

Imagining the kind of life that I always wanted and imagining that I'm already living it. The Power of Intention and Desire. 

The Power of Letting Go

The Power of Acceptance 

The Power of Liberation. 

Next week I'm gonna work on Two things 

:1 Monthly Goals Chart. 

2 List of Personal Problems that need to be worked on.

3 Spirituality and Love through Reiki... 

 

Edited March 6, 2018 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

[Preety_India]

A 32

Monthly Goals Chart a day Daily Goals Chart 

TL = number of T completed as per goals chart. 

CL = points 

[Preety_India]

On 3/2/2018 at 0:29 AM, Preety_India said:

My Engagement 

* Facebook groups and Math

* YouTube 

* Internet Browsing 

* Use or Application of Education

* Reading Books

* Messenger App

* Facebook groups for Tasks

* Paper Tasks lists 

* Psychology Babble

* Self Actualization Journals 

* Personal Growth

CL= clicker points

TL= Task lists or tasks completed. 

This is a good one. 

[Preety_India]

Need to call the doctor for an appointment 

[Preety_India]

I just need some peace of mind at least till Tuesday 

[Preety_India]

Another toxic situation I'm stuck in. 

[Preety_India]

I wanted to write an update and I just forgot. Lol... What was it??? Thinking.. 

[Preety_India]

I'm too tired to do anything now. Fed up. Wanna breathe. 

Pack my bags and just go. 

This chapter is over and I need to close it and begin a new journey in my life. God knows where it takes me. Just too much stress in today's world. 

Need to start a time line based system of recording my activities . Too much has happened and I never really focused on myself... It has been a lot to go through and finally I have made up my mind. No more is no more.. 

 

[Preety_India]

I have finally decided to break things off after a lot of contemplation and I'm not ready for another. 

 

Need to pay bills 

______

Update : paid the bills 

Edited March 10, 2018 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

A 40

 

Tomorrow need to check up on house rent and maintenance and see other bills. Pending bills. Keep the cards safe and make online accounts and do some programming work. 

Edited March 11, 2018 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Need to see the  cause behind my health problems and work on those issues. 

[Preety_India]

 

 

If the outcome is not good the only possibility is that it will be bad. 

*life is uncertain and full of uncertainties 

*you have to take risks either knowingly or unknowingly. There are visible risks and hidden risks 

* Accept and embrace and bravely face the uncertainties of life. 

*everything is a summation of dysfunction. 

* Accept the fact that life can have a sad ending especially when you see the possibility of it. It does not always have to be sweet and happy. It can be sad too. A sad ending is just a logical consequence of events and does not mean anything bad. Life is an adventure, an experiment and it can fail. Accept failure. 

*Don't be out of touch with reality. Mostly a cause of trouble. But dreaming something unreal is not bad either. 

*Work without attachment. Do not be attached to the outcome but be attached to the effort and the goal for which the effort is made. Work selflessly and with detachment. Your effort to solve  problems and fight with circumstances to create a positive outcome is far more important and worth rewarding than winning or losing. Even if the outcome didn't turn out to be the desired one or doesn't look like you will have the desired one, you should not stop putting effort because that means giving up and also its okay if the required outcome was not achieved, you can always embrace and be proud of the struggle you put up to get there.    You know that you played a fair game and did your best and done your part.  The burden of guilt doesn't lie on you. Focus on your efforts and don't be attached to the outcome .  Work without expectation of good/bad result or without attaching to the outcome of your struggle.  1) Do your duty, but do not concern yourself with the results. Keep working do not expect results. 

Do Not Become Attached to the Fruits of Your Labor

 

* life is an adventure and hence its mysterious and can have both good and bad outcomes and endings. It was not meant to be a straight road with a perfect meaningful scripted ending. It was never meant to be beautiful or smooth. 

 

* expectations clash with reality resulting in frustration. 

 

* life can have a happy ending too. It's just a game of chance and luck. 

* nothing ever goes as planned. But good planning is important. 

* whenever anything is out of logic and sequence and there's disorder and chaos, the ultimate outcome is destruction. A good outcome is just a romantic fantasy. 

* Acceptance that life can have a miserable sad ending helps to cope with frustration and despair and gives Liberation from the cycle of guilt, self pity, conflict, dissonance and frustration. Lack of Acceptance leads to more frustration. 

* Do not take the final outcome of life too seriously and or be too attached to it or overly obsessed with it. This cause more frustration. Taking it lightly liberates you from tension, despair and frustration. It makes you feel like you are playing a game and winning or losing doesn't really matter. 

* life is for the brave and courageous. Have the courage to accept and face uncertainties and fight through them instead of letting them push you into hopelessness and depression. 

* life is not for the weak hearted that can't take risks and face setbacks. 

* Embrace your struggles. They help you learn, grow and become better and give you a hope that better things are on the way. 

How to make decisions in the face of uncertainties of life :

* Decide with your brain. Take risks but take calculated risks. 

* keep Plan B ready as a safety net, so if you end up losing out, you don't lose much or end up in distress. Plan B always saves and keeps you afloat. 

*  don't ignore your gut instinct and your heart. Not all decisions from the head work out as per the calculations. Not all decisions by heart can be relied on. It has to be partially divided between the two. Use both. 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited March 12, 2018 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Male sexuality is very complex and completely misguided. 

[Preety_India]

Today was a good day.