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Nexeternity

Bufo Alvarius Ceremony #4 Buenos Aires

9 posts in this topic

I keep typing the first few words of this post and deleting them, I really cant find the words to describe this trip.

It was the most powerful experience Ive had in my whole life.  I think all the trips prior to this and the Vipassana retreat set the stage for it to happen.

I was really afraid about working with the medicine.  The last trip was tremendously strong, I remember my ego getting obliterated and my arrogance shown to my face, my tears of anguish and screams of rage that were let out from that trip.

So I smoked it full of fear and as it started to come on I remembered.  

I remember what this medicine was like, my ego disolved but I stayed conscious.  

I tried as hard as I could to not interfere but also not to not interfere.

So it was this weird kind of trying not to try but also trying not to not try also.

I let it happen by itself, as best as I could.

And as the beauty set in, the mind got really quiet, the anxiety and fear vanished, the faith welled up in me like never before.

I saw what I have always been seeing and always will see.  That I am not doing any of this, that its all happening by itself and each move is inevitable, that my arrogance and unconscious fear stands in the way of my peace, freedom, and authenticity.

It was all so beautiful and peaceful.  

I know I have this fear in me, and I dont think Ill ever understand it fully.  Just have to keep dissolving it with the practices, tripping, facing my fears, and being as honest and authentic as I can.

I really love you guys!

Thanks for being here to share with.

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Thank you for sharing with this community, awesome post bro

 

What  I am curious about is what now? Do you still think you will work with psychedelics?

 

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@herghly Thanks man!

Yes definately, every single trip has gotten deeper for me.  I see it as something Ill do my whole life to keep growing, like reading or meditating.

Even the idea of becoming a shaman becomes really enticing. 

I think the trick is actually working the insights and inspirations in between the trips.  If you do that you set yourself up to get deeper insights and diferent inspirations the next trip.

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13 minutes ago, Nexeternity said:

I think the trick is actually working the insights and inspirations in between the trips.  If you do that you set yourself up to get deeper insights and diferent inspirations the next trip.

This makes sense ?

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Thank you for sharing!

Just one thing... Don't expect that you will be doing this. Instead open up for the possibility that you don't want to do anything in the future <3

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