Admitting you're wrong

[electroBeam]

If you do something that annoys someone else, admitting you're wrong seems like a spiritual thing to do. The contrary to it is defending a position of righteousness, which in the end feels like clinging onto a piece of shit that's smelly and isn't that good to be around anyway.

But what if the person gets angry at you so much that it makes you feel stale inside and posions the rest of your day? 

Where is the line between admitting you're wrong, and not tolerating someone posioning your life?

Is there ever a situation where not admitting you're wrong is the spiritually acceptable thing to do? Or is it all ego

[Slade]

@electroBeam I’d say to first admit you’re wrong and then see what happens in the relationship. If they’re still super angry then that’s toxic and you shouldn’t be around them. My top value is integrity, you’d be surprised how much weight is lifted off your shoulders when you’re honest with yourself and others. By expressing your truth, you let go. It’s amazing give it a shot. 

[Echoes]

@electroBeam there is a buddhist saying that goes something like this: "What a person is saying is his karma, how you are reacting is your karma." 

So imo, admitting being wrong is the "right" thing to do. The anger of the other person is only your problem if you let it be so. The question is, why are you letting the anger affect you so much? This is where I would look and investigate.

[poimandres]

2 hours ago, electroBeam said:

If you do something that annoys someone else, admitting you're wrong seems like a spiritual thing to do. The contrary to it is defending a position of righteousness, which in the end feels like clinging onto a piece of shit that's smelly and isn't that good to be around anyway.

But what if the person gets angry at you so much that it makes you feel stale inside and posions the rest of your day? 

Where is the line between admitting you're wrong, and not tolerating someone posioning your life?

Is there ever a situation where not admitting you're wrong is the spiritually acceptable thing to do? Or is it all ego

There has to be more to this story here. Why would you associate with someone who moves you to that degree of anger?

Saying, I'm sorry, and then going right back into a destructive environment? Doesn't make sense, maybe give some clarification?

[electroBeam]

6 hours ago, poimandres said:

There has to be more to this story here. Why would you associate with someone who moves you to that degree of anger?

Saying, I'm sorry, and then going right back into a destructive environment? Doesn't make sense, maybe give some clarification?

having an argument multiple times a day over petty stuff.

[Reflection]

Good question.

Perhaps you are adding a little bit of slap to your opinions?  Try not to put them into a position where a confession would feel like utter humiliation, or even defeat.  In reverse, try not to let such feelings of humiliation or righteousness keep you from confessing when you are wrong. 

Focus on building them up, instead of tearing them down.  But make sure they want to be built up first.  A person who is convinced against their own will, is still of the same opinion.

[YaNanNallari]

Your mind is adding things to admitting you're wrong. It does it with many things. Twist is a nice word, because even good concepts are twisted by our ego to fit older models or to protect itself.

Edited February 8, 2018 by YaNanNallari

[Shin]

Did you consider this possibility:

What if sometimes, apologizing is how more ego is created ?

It can happen, I guarantee it ... 

 

Edited February 8, 2018 by Shin

[electroBeam]

9 hours ago, Shin said:

Did you consider this possibility:

What if sometimes, apologizing is how more ego is created ?

It can happen, I guarantee it ... 

 

I don't physically apologise, but try and let go of my opinions about defending myself, but is there ever a point in time when defending yourself is the less egoic thing to do.

12 hours ago, Reflection said:

Good question.

Perhaps you are adding a little bit of slap to your opinions?  Try not to put them into a position where a confession would feel like utter humiliation, or even defeat.  In reverse, try not to let such feelings of humiliation or righteousness keep you from confessing when you are wrong. 

Focus on building them up, instead of tearing them down.  But make sure they want to be built up first.  A person who is convinced against their own will, is still of the same opinion.

+1 Don't focus on the confession but focus on why things happened.

Instead of trying to let go of defending yourself, ask why the situation happened and let go of every opinion that was just grabbed out of thin air, and put all opinions that were deduced in the situation in context (on the chopping block) rather than just letting go of opinions without assessing the situation. So basically give your defense a second chance rather than immediately dismissing it.

[Deep]

23 hours ago, electroBeam said:

But what if the person gets angry at you so much that it makes you feel stale inside and posions the rest of your day? 

Where is the line between admitting you're wrong, and not tolerating someone posioning your life?

Is there ever a situation where not admitting you're wrong is the spiritually acceptable thing to do? Or is it all ego

If you know in your heart you're right, there's no need to apologize or admit fault. If you're wrong, it is better to admit it because it would only make you feel worse. How someone else feels is their problem. If they can't accept your apology, they're the ones who are wrong. 

[Shin]

31 minutes ago, electroBeam said:

I don't physically apologise, but try and let go of my opinions about defending myself, but is there ever a point in time when defending yourself is the less egoic thing to do.

+1 Don't focus on the confession but focus on why things happened.

Instead of trying to let go of defending yourself, ask why the situation happened and let go of every opinion that was just grabbed out of thin air, and put all opinions that were deduced in the situation in context (on the chopping block) rather than just letting go of opinions without assessing the situation. So basically give your defense a second chance rather than immediately dismissing it.

Is your first sentence a question ?

BTW, I'm happy for you, you seem to be less confused than some months ago  

[MarkusSweden]

I admit I was too prejudicing in the past regarding how man and women are! 

I changed my mind, and now I think differences are bigger between individuals then groups and sexes.

If fact, as enlightened being we are no longer those labels. I'm not a man this and that tall with that occupation. 

No, I'm consciousness, infinite awareness.