Ibn Sina

How do I stop getting offended so much? My mind is killing me!

11 posts in this topic

To an intended or an unintended offense, my highly unenlightened , unaware ,egoistic and impulsive mind goes on for hours keeping a very violent, dormant , seething anger and deep, heart wrenching  negativity  and as I hold it for prolonged periods my soul gets burned , I get very tired, I suffer a lot. May be I am suffering from a mental condition. How do I stop my mind from latching to petty insults, , to which I helplessly mull over and nibble on for hours no matter how much illogical I can perceive it to be, which eventually saps all my life energy and takes my youth and  vitality away. I can't focus enough to learn or work. Help. 

 

 

 


"Whatever you do or dream you can begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. "   - Goethe
                                                                                                                                 
My Blog- Writing for Therapy

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Write it out on some pen and paper (not computer). Work through and get it out your head. That way you'll be able to see what happening a bit more clearly. 

It will show how illogical your mind can be, even more so when you come back to have a look what you previously wrote. 

Its always good to 'throw up' our thoughts on paper where they can be examined. If you leave them in your thinking, they'll just spin around and develop with no grasp of what the hell you need to get passed.

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@Ibn Sina  Time. Simply time.

You have a lot of it if you can indulge in that behavior.

 

If you get a life, your mind will be busy with that instead.

The best thing would be if you ended up in a prolongedsurvivalsituation, where you yourself needed to take action. What really matters totally wipes out bullshit very fast.

I recommend that you start working with some really physicallabour, outdoors and with real men.

The body work will tire you out, force presens of mind and the men will not accept bullshit and hold you accountable for showing up and putting in an honest days work. There will be no time for you to run away and hide in your mind then.

The outdoors will litterly blow some fresh air into your brain/mind.

 

When you become more balanced, I think that your writing and choice of words was really good and you seem very gifted with the pen. So there could be a brilliant carrer for you within that field.

One problem with overly intelligent people, and I think that you are one, would be fixation, selfcenterdness and fragile egos. This can result in the inability to actually move on/get unfrozen/get out of a thoughtloop/take action.

 

I would bet that you by now are part pissedoff and part discombobulated?

Well, know that I mean well and that you do need a kick in the ass to move forward.

Where do your mind go? To problemsolving, that you asked for or back to mindlooping? You know where, if you do take constructive action with your problem.

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Taking lessons from Leo's "all criticisms are untenable" video. I have found that whenever I get offended by something someone did, I remember a time where I infact did that exact same thing. For example, maybe a person doesn't like you and are giving you signals that they don't like you. But then if you can remember any time in your life (you may not be able to remember any) where you did the exact same thing, then your minds argumentative side sort of dies down some because "Why am I getting mad at someone for doing the exact same thing I did." And that may not make you any less sad or angry, but it will definitely help with winning against your mind in an argument.

 

But there's also just not caring about peoples opinions, which Leo has a video on. 

 

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Anchor yourself with your breathe or with a mantra.. I found that my breathe was the perfect tool for me to bring myself back to my awareness. 

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Thank you so much friends!


"Whatever you do or dream you can begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. "   - Goethe
                                                                                                                                 
My Blog- Writing for Therapy

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On 2/6/2018 at 1:05 PM, Ibn Sina said:

my... mind goes on for hours 

 

On 2/6/2018 at 1:05 PM, Ibn Sina said:

I helplessly mull over and nibble on for hours..

 

On 2/6/2018 at 1:05 PM, Ibn Sina said:

I get very tired, I suffer a lot.

I didn't mark them to discomfort you, but, if that's the case for real, then:

On 2/6/2018 at 1:05 PM, Ibn Sina said:

petty insults,

Can you give some specifics about it? Is someone targeting you obviously? Is it a situation that you feel vulnerable with no-protection? Is it an inner sensation that you see/picture yourself inferior, easy to get hurt by others?

@Ibn Sina

Edited by Sevi

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@Ibn Sina Whenever you feel offended, ask yourself why? What values of yours are in conflict? What about that irks you, and why?

Ask yourself is it reasonable for you to hold these values (maybe they're wrong) or to defend them so much as to suffer for it?

Ask yourself if it's possible for someone to be told the same thing or witness the same thing and not feel negatively about it? Would an ant be offended by that? Would god? Why are you being offended then?

This isn't a catch-all solution but maybe it helps.


God and I worked things out

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Find you life purpose and get to work on that.  It’s when we are idle that we get offended.  When you are focused and on a mission, you don’t have time to get offended.  Don’t repress or suppress getting offended either.  Just accept the thoughts and emotions fully and watch them.  Don’t identify with them.  Just become aware of how the self-image causes all thoughts and feelings of being offended.  And we all have Ego — it’s just some of us have de-centered it more than others have.  But that takes time to do, the rest of our lives are devoted to it.

Edited by Joseph Maynor

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@Ibn Sina There will always be something to offend, until the fixated self-identification as someone who is offended falls away.

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@snowleopard it's possible for a non enlightened person to not be offended. In order to be offended you need to have a negative emotional reaction, you can still be attacked as an ego and not feel bad about it.


God and I worked things out

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