Sensitive soul

[Shin]

1 minute ago, Charlotte said:

I have to admit, I took what you said in other thread completely wrong and then it clicked. Once again I took something personal, quite embarrassed to be honest ?but never mind that 

Is this why you feel your having a depressive episode?

I don't understand what you're saying (no joke)  

[Charlotte]

11 minutes ago, Shin said:

I don't understand what you're saying (no joke)  

Right... Explain to me what you meant by

"lol It still doesn't feel like you really exist, just like the people I saw this morning and even my mom."?

[Shin]

11 minutes ago, Charlotte said:

Right... Explain to me what you meant by

"lol It still doesn't feel like you really exist, just like the people I saw this morning and even my mom."?

Well I talk to them, but to me it's like there is just a physical appearance using words, but I don't fundamentally feel like it's an another person.

There is a glitch in the matrix, if I fully felt it it should be enlightenment from what I know conceptually.

 

[Charlotte]

5 minutes ago, Shin said:

Well I talk to them, but to me it's like there is just a physical appearance using words, but I don't fundamentally feel like it's an another person.

There is a glitch in the matrix, if I fully felt it it should be enlightenment from what I know conceptually.

 

30 minutes ago, Shin said:

I don't understand what you're saying (no joke)  

Okay, well AT FIRST I thought you mean it as... How do I put it... " How do I know your real person? You could be anyone over the internet"

 

See not everyone on this forum talks from a non dual perspective, some people, as we know are at different stages of self actualisation. 

 

So when I say "it clicked" I meant as in, I realised you meant it literally. 

 

I went through this "does my mum even exist?, Why am I here then?" And to be honest my head was absolutely baffled and I became depressed for a period of time, my mum understood what I was going through and she said "You need to take a break from it Charlotte". I did too much to soon 

And from what I understand I had an 'Ego backlash' which wasn't a pleasant experience. 

So yeah, hope that explains what I mean. 

[Shin]

14 minutes ago, Charlotte said:

Okay, well AT FIRST I thought you mean it as... How do I put it... " How do I know your real person? You could be anyone over the internet"

 

See not everyone on this forum talks from a non dual perspective, some people, as we know are at different stages of self actualisation. 

 

So when I say "it clicked" I meant as in, I realised you meant it literally. 

 

I went through this "does my mum even exist?, Why am I here then?" And to be honest my head was absolutely baffled and I became depressed for a period of time, my mum understood what I was going through and she said "You need to take a break from it Charlotte". I did too much to soon 

And from what I understand I had an 'Ego backlash' which wasn't a pleasant experience. 

So yeah, hope that explains what I mean. 

Yeah, that will happen sooner or later, but you may have more important things to do now  

I don't personally think it's a good idea to have some deep realizations if you struggle with your psychology, because it will make things even worse.

Some people become completely crazy because they didn't care about their psychology before doing this kind of work,  they've gone too far too quick. Too much psychedelics, too much retreat etc ...

At the same time I don't like saying things like that because it can be used as a defense mechanism to not do anything towards it.

Edited February 7, 2018 by Shin

[Charlotte]

7 minutes ago, Shin said:

Yeah, that will happen sooner or later, but you may have more important things to do now  

I don't personally think it's a good idea to have some deep realizations if you struggle with your psychology, because it will make things even worse.

Some people become completely crazy because they didn't care about their psychology before doing this kind of work,  they've gone too far too quick. Too much psychedelics, too much retreat etc ...

At the same time I don't like saying things like that because it can be used as a defense mechanism to not do anything towards it.

Right now my main purpose is to sort out my life purpose. I have to be FULLY commited to that (at the moment). I'm going studying psychology and hoping to progress to university etc but I've been out of education for a while so it's a little daunting. 

 

I've studied and inquired to death, I know on the surface level there is a glitch in the matrix, I know my whole life is just like some theatrical play, I makeup, I know 'Charlotte' and all my beliefs, likes and dislikes are fictional, I know I AM not real, but honestly? What else do I have? By knowing this, I don't take myself as seriously as I used to. I try and use life as a playground to have fun with everyday, but at the same time I weed out the shit. I've only been studying self actualisation and spirituality from around Aug last year and I've come a LONG way in such little time. My life has radically changed. 

 

Yes I agree with what your saying about the defence mechanism but if you truly believe your perception of reality is flawed and you know there is no 'I' you will ALWAYS be searching in one way or another. 

[sgn]

5 hours ago, Shin said:

I don't personally think it's a good idea to have some deep realizations if you struggle with your psychology, because it will make things even worse.

Some people become completely crazy because they didn't care about their psychology before doing this kind of work,  they've gone too far too quick. Too much psychedelics, too much retreat etc ...

So true! More people should know about this. I speak from experience.

I tried to escape a lifetime of suffering getting involved with enlightenment work only to experience the worst suffering ever because of it.

I still think Leo should mention this more in his enlightenment videos.