Is It Possible To Completely Convert Yourself From Introvert To Extrovert?

[7thLetter]

Nothing bothers me more than people claiming that they "used to be introverted," and now all of a sudden they have become an extrovert. They tend to think that being introverted means that you are a shy person, but it's much more complex than that. I mean I understand the two personality types pretty well, but is it possible to change the self-image of yourself that you are of the introverted personality type, into an extroverted personality type? Maybe through some sort of self-inquiry or any sort of spiritual work? If yes, then it would be difficult for me to imagine that I would be able to change the way I respond to certain stimulus and become more of an external person rather than internal. Over the past couple of years, I've been working as much as I can on my personality to become more of a social person and I am seeing some great results. But these are results in my social skills and overall confidence, and did not change the fact that I'm a thinker, or the fact that I need my alone time, or that I'm quiet in group settings, etc. etc.

[Toby]

Take Eckhart Tolle as an example. In the System of the Enneagram (something a bit like the MBTI) he is a "selfpreservational 5", which is by default the most withdrawn type out of 27 types/subtypes.

He is imo very free and at peace and he is able to at times show more extrovertet behaviour, but afterall he is still an introvert. So Awakening won't chance your personality necessarily.

Edited February 29, 2016 by Toby

[Isle of View]

@7thLetter

How does being an introvert serve you?

or

How does making the distincion of introvert/extrovert serve you?

How would you define an extroverted person, and why does it inply that he couldn't be a thinker or need his alone-time from time to time?

What would you need to face if you were more extroverted?

Visualise your optimum ratio of introversion/extroversion which would suit your purpose line and visualise how you would be, behave, commune with others and your surroundings, your general environment et al.

I don't ask you to answer those questions right here, but to contemplate/work on them for a while.

~ Chris

[Stef]

An introvert by definition is someone whose energy is directed inwardly. You are energized by being alone, focusing on yourself and too much time spent with others feels overwhelming and drains you after a while.

An extravert is the exact opposite. Their energy is directed outwardly, towards other people and they charge their batteries from being around and interacting with others.

There isn't anything wrong with being either type. Everyone has stages in life where they withdraw/come out of their shell. It's not possible to be 100% on one end of the spectrum. 

It's nice to change things up for a bit but I don't believe in altering your type. Accept yourself for who you are.

[Delusion]

 

Why would you try so hard converting yourself?

I'd recommend this video, maybe you can find answers to these questions:
 

1.       What is introversion and do pure introverts even exist 

2.       What happens when you try to “fit in” and suppress who you are

3.       How denying you nature affects everything and everybody around you

4.       How and why society tries to change introverts into extroverts

[FindingPeace]

Interesting topic. I think it's possible to be both introverted and extroverted at different times. I see this in myself.

Generally speaking I am quite introveted. I like alone time, am inwardly directed and not bothered about imposing myself outwardly on the world or other people. I don't feel the need to participate and engage with the situations and people around me. I am happy as a 'fly on the wall'. I'm an observer, I like to watch and listen, not always contribute.

Yet, in certain situations where I am comfortable and familiar with the environment and the people I can be quite extroverted. Contribute, engage, be outwardly directed. I enjoy being social and interracting with people.

I think there is a time and a place for each way of 'being'. And it is possible to be either way.

Some people are chronically introverted because they lack confidence. Others just appear introverted because they choose to keep themselves to themselves - not because they aren't confident. Extroverts can be so because they crave social validation. Others can appear that way because they actively want to contribute and particiapte - not because they 'need' to be.

There are all sorts of reasons why people may be one way or the other, or both. But there's no rule as to which way you should be. Unless of course you feel that there is an important, personal, reson to change in which case you can work on that in time - but you need to identify what causes you to be the way you are first.

Maybe you like 'self' time and being an observer more than a participant. Nothing wrong with that.

4 hours ago, 7thLetter said:

Over the past couple of years, I've been working as much as I can on my personality to become more of a social person and I am seeing some great results.

Don't become a 'social person' for the sake of it. How do you 'become' a social person? By learning how to be something you aren't? A lot of 'socialising' is just pretentious BS. Learning how to talk BS to other people who can talk BS has no real value. When I watch social interracion between people or groups I see such a lot inauthenticity. People feining interest, story topping, comming out with 'interesting' anecdotes and factoids just for the sake of it... I've come away from social settings wondering what the heck sort of value I got from it, especially as I realise what nonsense conversations were had!

Always be yourself. Don't try to say or do what you think people expect you to say or do just because it prolongs the social interraction. Be genuine.

[Hengame]

Being extrovert is my problem too, maybe because of lack of confidence? Could be I am talking about myself  , I watched Leo video and I tried to take baby step, but still I do not have the feeling of being extroverted. This is one of my biggest problem, in a meeting even I have a excellent idea but I am not able to open my mouse and say that. I am suffering because of this, but I am working on it.  Last month my boss asked me why I am so quiet in meeting? Should I answe I hate to say so many bla bla like the other people like to hear bla bla and nonsense. 

[str4]

I've been pondering about my introvertness (is that even a word), for some time too. For me, it's clear that being an introvert has nothing to do with being anti-social; since I'm not anti-social, I just don't always like to be around people. 

Being an introvert is not always so clear to me, since I have some situations where I show the characteristics of an extrovert, such as:

When there's a party coming up or an event where there are a lot of people around, I feel positively eager to participate. This is more so when it comes to events with strangers. So this is a very UN-introverted thinking it would seem.

However, I've concluded why I think like this despite the fact that I consider myself an introvert. 

When there's an event coming up with new people I haven't met, I'm eager to talk to them, because I'm always looking for a deep, meaningful discussion with somebody new, who has fresh ideas and opinions. I'm terrible at small talk, and I always try to move the discussion towards a more deep conversation. If I can't get the conversation past small talk, I easily lose interest.

Now when it comes to events where there are people whom I know can't have a meaningful conversation, I don't have the slightest interest in being there. 

So, being a social introvert is not a problem if you ask me. It's the content of the conversation that matters.

[Guest Kingkong123]

Yes and no, Yes in the sense that you can become comfortable and at ease in social settings. No as in you can't change your 'hard-wiring'. Also, Introversion is not to be confused with shyness, neither Extroversion with confidence.

[Mal]

@7thLetter

What is more fruitful is to drop this idea of becoming extroverted 

We live in a society that rewards extroverts and marginalizes introverts purely because extroverts help to maintain the system.  They make better celebrities, neurotic managers, pickup artists, ladies men, entertainers to stimulate the neurotic needs of the deficient individual.  It's a complete facade.

Being extroverted isn't any more special than being introverted, it's just that society conditions introverts to hate themselves because they don't fit in with this ridiculous schema we have constructed for ourselves.

So be who you are, don't buy into more programming and lies.  What we need is more authentic people and less conditioned people desperate to "make it" in a system that is bound to fail, a system that never meets the needs of humanity, but only feeds the ideology of rationalism.

As Maslow once said: "And what shall we make of the well adjusted slave"?

[Fishy]

Love being an introvert. Gives me great space and time to focus on things i think is important to me, not chasing some social BS.

[Pelin]

@7thLetter I do believe with a lot of people here who say most people are both introverted and extroverted depending on the situation. I am mostly introverted when it comes to meeting people outside, having close friends that you get updated every second, going for drinks etc. (It thought these were just teenager stuff lol, but in thirties they still exist). I mostly hate occasions like that, and in my journey towards self-actualization I more often than not try to avoid these kinds of people and situations (like parties and group meetings and pubs).

Yet, in my relationship with close friends (well friends I meet at least once a year  if they don't live in another corner of the planet) and my significant other, and in the classroom (I'm a teacher), I am quite extroverted. There is so much insight I can gain through these interactions. How I behave in the classroom might be just the opposite of how I behave in a party. Even my posture changes!

And there was a time in my life where I found this awkward and unhealthy. Am I not being myself in one of these, I used to think. But now I am at peace with it. Both of these are real me. If I forced myself to participate more in the nonsense chitchat people enjoy, I wouldn't be myself. It's not being shy, I can understand it now. It's just turning inward is more rewarding at those times. (To me, shyness is more like, I want to interact but because of self-esteem and self-confidence issues, I find it difficult)

p.s. there is a great TED talk about how you can change your body language and therefore feel more powerful (that can help with being shy if you think that is your problem). I really like it and recommend it to students who feel shy especially in public speaking or classroom participation: