What can girls do to meet a guy?

[frnsh]

51 minutes ago, Shin said:

What are those habits and red lights then ?

Can you give some examples ?

Open up ... 

Thanks for caring and following this  

I know some of the confusions come from being gender fluid but I feel myself having this tendency to force the feminine side to stop itself or probably I look down on it and assume it weak even though my logic says otherwise. And well, I know most of it if not all, comes from the past.  I don't want to blame and I want to fix it in myself, but mostly I'm not sure what should I do. 

Like many times (especially casual ones) when I dress feminine my masculine part is like wtf is this. I ignore it but it makes me really self conscious and uncomfortable sometimes. On the other hand, I feel myself stopping the feminine part when the masculine one does something similar. There is this constant war in my head and I feel I'm in between cheering for and supporting the masculine one! Kinda funny when I'm imagining the picture now  

I got this great advice from one of my friends who is in a similar situation; she said that maybe I should stop labeling and categorizing things by them being feminine or masculine so I can have some peace doing any. Seems promising and it has helped, but I prefer a deeper fix on this. I have done some research but there is not much sources about it due to me being a bit of a minority.  

 

P.S. I hope this is still OK under the subject of this topic.

Edited March 8, 2018 by frnsh

[Shin]

5 minutes ago, frnsh said:

Thanks for caring and following this  

I know some of the confusions come from being gender fluid but I feel myself having this tendency to force the feminine side to stop itself or probably I look down on it and assume it weak even though my logic says otherwise. And well, I know most of it if not all, comes from the past.  I don't want to blame and I want to fix it in myself, but mostly I'm not sure what should I do. 

Like many times (especially casual ones) when I dress feminine my masculine part is like wtf is this. I ignore it but it makes me really self conscious and uncomfortable sometimes. On the other hand, I feel myself stopping the feminine part when the masculine one does something similar. There is this constant war in my head and I feel I'm in between cheering for and supporting the masculine one! Kinda funny when I'm imagining the picture now  

I got this great advice from one of my friends who is in a similar situation; she said that maybe I should stop labeling and categorizing things by them being feminine or masculine so I can have some peace doing any. Seems promising and it has helped, but I prefer a deeper fix on this. I have done some research but there is not much sources about it due to me being a bit of a minority.  

 

P.S. I hope this is still OK under the subject of this topic.

Hummm.

Actually I'm the same, good to know that term.

Well you gotta go for the spiritual path.

You don't categorize or judge your action like that when you're detached from your sense of self.

I personally don't care if I appear too «weak» or too «assholish», I just be how I feel in the moment.

Did you start your spiritual journey ?

If not you should buy «The power of Now», from Eckhart Tolle, it's probably the book that helps the most when you start, and it's easy to read and very on point on everything it teach.

[frnsh]

5 minutes ago, Shin said:

Hummm.

Actually I'm the same, good to know that term.

Well you gotta go for the spiritual path.

You don't categorize or judge your action like that when you're detached from your sense of self.

I personally don't care if I appear too «weak» or too «assholish», I just be how I feel in the moment.

Did you start your spiritual journey ?

If not you should buy «The power of Now», from Eckhart Tolle, it's probably the book that helps the most when you start, and it's easy to read and very on point on everything it teach.

Thanks I'll try that book. I have started my spiritual journey and have been in it for a long time now. This thing is a bit new to me as it revealed itself and started challenging me when I learned to open deeper parts of myself up. I think I need some adjustments to reduce the strength of some of my beliefs that are still standing (referring to the web of beliefs video of Leo). 

[Shin]

3 minutes ago, frnsh said:

Thanks I'll try that book. I have started my spiritual journey and have been in it for a long time now. This thing is a bit new to me as it revealed itself and started challenging me when I learned to open deeper parts of myself up. I think I need some adjustments to reduce the strength of some of my beliefs that are still standing (referring to the web of beliefs video of Leo). 

Just be conscious when those thoughts comes, see them from afar, don't judge them, be the passive observer ?

Also there is probably books about this, but I don't know any, so I hope someone will see your message, or maybe open a thread about it ? ☺

[frnsh]

2 minutes ago, Shin said:

Just be conscious when those thoughts comes, see them from afar, don't judge them, be the passive observer ?

Also there is probably books about this, but I don't know any, so I hope someone will see your message, or maybe open a thread about it ? ☺

True. Observing helps a lot, with most things actually

I'm not sure, I think I keep digging and practicing myself for a while. 

About what you said that you are similar, I suggest you taking some tests online. There is a thin line between all the categories they have and it's nice to know which you are closer to in order to have less confusion. Of course it's amazing not to care about it much, but it's usually not nice when it kicks in and you notice how annoying it is. 

[Shin]

9 minutes ago, frnsh said:

True. Observing helps a lot, with most things actually

I'm not sure, I think I keep digging and practicing myself for a while. 

About what you said that you are similar, I suggest you taking some tests online. There is a thin line between all the categories they have and it's nice to know which you are closer to in order to have less confusion. Of course it's amazing not to care about it much, but it's usually not nice when it kicks in and you notice how annoying it is. 

Do you have a good test ?

The 3 I did were not very well made.

[frnsh]

13 minutes ago, Shin said:

Do you have a good test ?

The 3 I did were not very well made.

I'm afraid not. I did a lot of them from different and a bit random sources when I googled. The point for me was that almost all resulted the same.