My Map For Development (advice me)

[severedfred]

Hi, you fine group of wise people. 

I've spent some time now (9 month) trying to map out the things in my life that is not working as well as I would like them to. I've done various personality tests (the enneagram for example, wich i defently find to be the most accurate for my purposes), I've done strength tests and been writing journal a long time to see where my biggest areas of suffering is. This is my list of the 14 areas I would like to give attention, to find the habits that most effectively treat as many areas as possible. What has become clear to me so far is:

Regular Meditation & Physical Exercise would benefit almost all of these areas, especially me since my personality type and history give me a tendency to be very neurotic, stuck in my imagination and "missing life". Its safe to say that I probably would feel 92% better in my life if i just had a routine of doing meditation and exercise every day. (well, meditation every day, not skip a day no matter what, as Leo suggest in his meditation video), and try to work out everyday while being mindful of the homeostasis, and be willing to do serious negotiation). 

Since, if you as me, truly try to listen to what Leo say, Self-discipline and Routine is where the rubber meets the road in personal development. With that logic, finding out the areas that most keep me from getting anywhere -to find out 1-3 things that give me the biggest results and putting them in to a daily routine, would make me grow the fastest. Since my past misstakes have been to try to do to much, and develop to many areas at the same time which left me with a routine to hard to follow with to many things to do, I now try to narrow it down to its fundamentals. 

To me, it truly looks like Meditation and physical exercise is the two things that gives the widest spread of development to me of all of the 14 areas of development. BUT, I might have overlooked something. This is important, since the conclusion of this list, will be deeply involved in the next 5-10 years of my life. I will soon make the commitment, to follow the results of this with a 100% focus, no matter how it might feel, or how much I doubt myself, I will follow threw. 

What do I ask for with this Post?

• I am a clear type 5 (the investigator) on the enneagram test, so I figured there might be others who are the same type that might have valuable insight to my areas of development, and want to share his/hers experiences and knowledge on the concrete activities/habits that works for you.
• People on this forum might not be as close to the problem as I am, and might see a bigger picture and a "clear path" that would benefit me and my areas of development. (something tells me that meditation and enlightenment is going to be the number one suggestion, which it already is for me in some degree). For that reason, this needs to be said: I meditate every day (not missing a single day) i am close to 3 month with 20 minutes focus on breath so far. I been on and off with meditation since I been having a problem with routines. But whats more important, is that I truly believe in meditation. I am very intrigued by enlightenment work, even tho it still may be from a distance. I am by nature, interested in the search for truth. I long for the day when I, more in depth, can dive into enlightenment work with more time and effort. I have already seen enormous tremendous amounts of benefits with meditation, even tho I don't have that much experience. So far I reached a state of "out of the body experience, and a deep connection with something I never felt before, something unexplainable, like a little nudge och something I would describe as true happiness. I have never tried any psychedelic what so ever, and look forward to a time somewhere in the distant future when I've reached a certain discipline and experience with meditation to accurately use them for deepening my understanding of life, myself and the humanity. So, if you truly think I should leave every other thing and just pursue enlightenment work, please, suggest it, but please don't try to "sell me on it".
• Maybe someone have more of a "narrow" expertise and experience with one of these topics, with biofeedback for example, as i gotten suggested from the enneagram test as a way of development. I am very interested in hearing your successful, concrete advice that I can apply into these areas of my life, both as a whole based on this information, and individual areas. 

GROWTH AREA 1 -The downside is that my capacity for concentration enables me to get deeply engrossed in my complex inner worlds, sometimes to the extent that i forget their surroundings or even to take care of myself. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 2 -Learn to notice when your thinking and speculating takes you out of the immediacy of your experience. Your mental capacities can be an extraordinary gift, but can also be a trap when you use them to retreat from contact with yourself and others. Stay connected with your physicality.

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 3 -You tend to be extremely intense and so high-strung that you find it difficult to relax and unwind. Make an effort to learn to calm down in a healthy way, without drugs or alcohol. Exercising or using biofeedback techniques will help channel some of your tremendous nervous energy. Meditation, jogging, yoga, and dancing are especially helpful for your type. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 4 -You tend to find it difficult to trust people, to open up to them emotionally, or to make themselves accessible in various ways. Their awareness of potential problems in relationships may tend to create a self-fulfilling prophecy. It is important to remember that having conflicts with others is not unusual and that the healthy thing is to work them out rather than reject attachments with people by withdrawing into isolation. NOTE: Some of this fear of conflict is based in the fear of physical confrontation developed in early years from bad parenting. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 5 -Behind Fives’ relentless pursuit of knowledge are deep insecurities about their ability to function successfully in the world. Fives feel that they do not have an ability to do things as well as others. But rather than engage directly with activities that might bolster their confidence, Fives “take a step back” into their minds where they feel more capable. Their belief is that from the safety of their minds they will eventually figure out how to do things—and one day rejoin the world. Fives spend a lot of time observing and contemplating.

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 6 -The intense focus of Fives can thus lead to remarkable discoveries and innovations, but when the personality is more fixated, it can also create self-defeating problems. This is because their focus of attention unwittingly serves to distract them from their most pressing practical problems. Whatever the sources of their anxieties may be—relationships, lack of physical strength, inability to gain employment, and so forth—average Fives tend not to deal with these issues.

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 7 -Notice when you are getting intensely involved in projects that do not necessarily support your self-esteem, confidence, or life situation. It is possible to follow many different fascinating subjects, games, and pastimes, but they can become huge distractions from what you know really need to do. Decisive action will bring more confidence than learning more facts or acquiring more unrelated skills.

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 8 -Fear of being useless, helpless, or incapable.

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 9 - Addiction -Poor eating and sleeping habits due to minimizing needs. Neglecting hygiene and nutrition. Lack of physical activity. Psychotropic drugs for mental stimulation and escape, narcotics for anxiety. I sometimes fall into a habit of using sleeping pils as a form of control. This because of a) fear of being sick, and b) fear of pain and suffering. When the fear becomes to strong, like if I can't sleep and I start to feel nauseous to the point that I feel like "i might going to be sick and puke" I feel the need to have control, to take a pill, and control the situation. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 10 -Do not pay so much attention to your feelings; they are not a true source of support for you, as you probably already know. Remember this advice: "From our present perspective, we can also see that one of the most important mistakes you make is to equate yourself with your feelings. The fallacy is that to understand yourself you must understand your feelings, particularly your negative ones, before acting. You do not see that the self is not the same as its feelings or that the presence of negative feelings does not preclude the presence of good in themselves". Always remember that your feelings are telling you something about yourself as you are at this particular moment, not necessarily more than that. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 11 -Avoid putting off things until you are "in the right mood." Commit yourself to productive, meaningful work that will contribute to your good and that of others, no matter how small the contribution may be. Working consistently in the real world will create a context in which you can discover yourself and your talents. (Actually, you are happiest when you are working—that is, activating your potentials and realizing yourself. You will not "find yourself" in a vacuum or while waiting for inspiration to strike, so connect—and stay connected—with the real world. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 12 -Self-esteem and self-confidence will develop only from having positive experiences, whether or not you believe that you are ready to have them. Therefore, put yourself in the way of good. You may never feel that you are ready to take on a challenge of some sort, that you always need more time. (Your type typically never feel that they are sufficiently "together," but they must nevertheless have the courage to stop putting off their lives.) Even if you start small, commit yourself to doing something that will bring out the best in you. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 13 -A wholesome self-discipline takes many forms, from sleeping regular hours to working regularly to exercising regularly, and has a cumulative, strengthening effect. Since it comes from yourself, a healthy self-discipline is not contrary to your freedom or individuality. On the other hand, sensuality, excessive sexual experiences, alcohol, drugs, sleep, or fantasizing have a debilitating effect on you, as you already know. Therefore, practice healthy self-discipline and stay with it. 

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

GROWTH AREA 14 -Impatience and stress - “Where am I headed?” you ask yourself. You ask this question every day. Guided by this theme of Focus, you need a clear destination. Lacking one, your life and your work can quickly become frustrating. And so each year, each month, and even each week you set goals. These goals then serve as your compass, helping you determine priorities and make the necessary corrections to get back on course. Your Focus is powerful because it forces you to filter; you instinctively evaluate whether or not a particular action will help you move toward your goal. Those that don’t are ignored. In the end, then, your Focus forces you to be efficient. Naturally, the flip side of this is that it causes you to become impatient with delays, obstacles, and even tangents, no matter how intriguing they appear to be.

WHAT ADVICE, EXPERIENCE OR RECOMMENDATION FOR HABBIT WOULD YOU RECOMMEND AS A SOLUTION FOR ME ON THIS TOPIC?

Thank you for reading and for any advice or comment you may have. Peace /Fred

[Dominik Drums]

Hello man,

I won't give you any advice at the moment. I just want to give you a feedback - I'm checking this forum from time to time and for me it's really rare to find people like you. Most of people are talking too much trash here and you are one of very few people who seriously take effort to make a change.

I'm with you! We share many behaviours and problems, I would like to really think about your situation and give you some advice, but I want to treat you seriously - advice to your post requires time and effort.

I will bookmark your post and follow it. If I find anything important to say I will reply. Right now just leaving you feedback - you are doing good work man so far and you will develop in nearest future if you stick to it, guaranteed! 

[severedfred]

@Dominik Drums Thx man, thats always nice to hear! 

I don't spend that much time here either, that would make me derail from my goal and purpose; to find my life's purpose. I find it easy to get stuck here sometimes just socialising, reading stuff that doesn't really bring me closer to my goal. But I truly find some of the people here really insightful in specific areas. 

I try to use this forum in the way I imagine Leo intended, to get help when you get stuck, and maybe find likeminded people when you feel alone on the self-development journey.

Thank you for acknowledging my hard work and effort, and of course I will take whatever advice or feedback you find relevant to share.

[severedfred]

 @Leo Gura  You might not have the time, but if you do (since your guidance led me to this point into my life) I would truly value your expertise. 

My question is this: While just reading thru my 14 areas of development, can you imagine something other than meditation and exercise that would benefit more- or as many of these individual problems of mine?