Help! I've designed a selfish life

[Butters]

I've always been extremely introverted and lone-wolfing this life, consciously designing it ever since I discovered self-help. I'm still working on everything, but throughout this journey I've created:

• A job that works for me
• A social circle that works for me
• Hobbies and interests that work for me
• Business and growth in this area that works for me
• A mild spiritual interest that works for me

It's all pretty selfish. Self-help has definitely pulled me out of a depression and created a pretty neat life that still in an upward spiral, but this bugs me. 

Has anyone been able to somehow break out of homeostasis and set aside the self agenda on a regular basis? I'm motivated to do so only from a higher consciousness, not AT ALL from lower consciousness. 

 

[Oliver Saavedra]

I would tell you to be honest with yourself and ask you some questions:

- Am I really really happy?
- Do I love my job? 
- Could I have that job for the rest of my life?
- Does my relationships feel true and meaningful? 
- Do my hobbies make me feel alive or are they just an attemp to relax and escape from something?
- What am I using my business for?, money?, security?, belonging?, esteem?
- Does my business feel like its going somewhere amazing and world-changing? 
- Why are am I interested in spirituality?, self-help checklist?, security?, belonging?, esteem?
- Why do I feel sellfish?
- How would it be if I were more self-less, loving, and compassionate?

You really need to sit down at least an hour a day and do nothing but contemplate this questions, be radically honest with yourself, and question your intuitive answers. Most of the times the problem is in the way you think about the problem, truly question yourself. 

[Barbarian Number 8]

Dear Mr. @Butters, you have managed to build a base that secure your base needs and now you seems to believe it to be homeostasis and selfish?

You need that base, of lower(?) consciousness needs,  to be covered in order to reach a higher consciousness wants.

There is another level to be built upon the base....or _many_ other levels, actually.

Leo got a clip of the matter.

 

I know it is a tricky thing to climb up from the abyss, build a good base and then the thought comes "was THAT it"? And then feeling empty.

Maybe that is normal?

But when you rested up after the climb and really get that you are safe, looking up and going into the "new" world state is very nice exploring.

 

It basicly sums down to two questions:

Would you rather focus on starwing?

or

Would you like to focus on leveling up?

 

 

 

 

[Ocean]

@Butters The more improved/aware the person you become, the better you'll be able to help those around you by example (rather than preaching). 

Self-development is a selfish process until its not. Enjoy the ride and be friendly to yourself. 

[aurum]

10 hours ago, Butters said:

• A job that works for me
• A social circle that works for me
• Hobbies and interests that work for me
• Business and growth in this area that works for me
• A mild spiritual interest that works for me

Dude, that's amazing.

This work IS selfish. We're all here because we want to live the greatest life possible, not the shittiest one.

The fact that you've seen some positive results is a cause for gratitude and celebration.

When Leo talks about becoming less selfish, he doesn't mean stop improving your life. But he is pushing you to become aware of how we all contribute to societies problems. No one is exempt from that, not even the Buddhist monk who lives in a monastery.

So don't beat yourself. Ride that upward spiral as much as you possibly can, and while you're doing that, help as many people as possible.

[Moreira]

Introversion is a deep aspect that is in your DNA, dont fight it. This natural tendencies like introversion, social anxiety, enjoying loneliness may sound bad in a society where the general narrative says that we must be social and extro. But this tendencies are survival mechanisms inherited from our ancestors. In other ages, the cautious, introverted, queit that didnt rely in strangers survives, whereas the overly social that trusted everybody may be cheated, ambushed, robbed or killed.

 

[Damir Elezi]

As I understand it, we are all inherently selfish creatures by nature. If all these things really "work" for you, I don't see a need to change them fundamentally. But then again, you wouldn't want to change, if you didn't feel some kind of need to do so. So what exactly is it you want? Why do you consider selfishness a bad thing? What would you like to change exactly? 

At this point in my life, I am striving towards designing a life like yours, but I understand that I probably won't be completely fulfilled by that. Maybe this is the time to take spirituality serious and get into that field? I heard that Leo has made a lot of videos about that stuff lately

[Nahm]

@Butters It doesn’t need to be one or the other. We can always take where we’re at, and find what need in it. Find more symbiosis in your ongoings. Train employees to be more than they imagined they could be, and integrate PD into the work place. Grow yourself out of the business, more freedom. Use the time to deeply pursue spirituality / enlightenment. Donate time, and or output from your hobbies to charities.  Live in the flow of beneficial for self and other. Obviously you’re doing great. Well done. Good luck!