Should I kill off this relationship?

[thehero]

There's this friend I have had since childhood. We aren't THAT close. He's my neighbor. I have nobody else. He has friends that he's closer with. We have some good laughs, some fun. 

 

Here's the dilemma: 

We constantly argue about self-improvement. He is not into self-improvement so a lot of the ideas I bring up are extremely opposite to his socially conditioned belief system (I am partly to blame here because I trigger a lot of arguments)

Top things that bother me (in order): 

He thinks he's better than me

He thinks I am a bad/terrible person (I had to drop out of school to pursue my bliss) 

He makes fun of me with other people and he talks shit about me 

He doesn't respect me & has a low opinion of me 

He thinks I'm a cuckoo head

Thinks I'm dumb & stupid 

 

Problem is, I helped him so much to start up his business. Gave him techniques and tactics and life philosophies that will help him for the rest of his life... And this is how he treats me... 

Though his opinion is so shit of me, I shouldn't care right?... Like it shouldn't matter if he thinks I'm lower than him? 

 

KEY: 

He doesn't directly communicate this stuff, it's mostly sub-communication. I've seen it all indirectly. Sometimes in arguments it's pretty apparent what he thinks of me and my ideas though.

 

Edited January 18, 2018 by thehero

[Spiral]

Well I generally try to avoid talking about PD with friends unless I know they are into it as well. 

Now would I from personal experience recommend cutting him out? no, because someone is better than no one.

It's really tricky to meet new people you don't have any other actual friends, especially if your maybe not the best at it. 

I would try to meet new people that you could transition into, to make new friends so to speak.

[Faceless]

Do we know what it takes to be in a healthy relationship. Do we hold a self imposed image being a conception, impression, or idea of ourselves and others? Can there be a relationship with yourself and another when there is this image set in place? Does this image u have about the other serve as a means of self gratification, personal pleasure, or self validation? Is this image projection set to bring a sense of security to the self? . If so is that a relationship, or a relationship with the image you project? 

Some practical questions that might help. Hope this stands out as significant for you?

[d0ornokey]

.

Edited January 18, 2018 by d0ornokey

[d0ornokey]

@Spiral

@Faceless

Great advice, thank you

[aurum]

@thehero

Don't talk about personal development with people who aren't into it. It's not your job to help them if they don't want it.

Also, I'm giving you a homework assignment. For the next week, write five different things you like about this guy every night.

[thehero]

3 hours ago, aurum said:

For the next week, write five different things you like about this guy every night.

ok ill do it. why though

yeah you're right. I feel pretty fucking dumb for talking about personal development to him for an entire year even though he doesn't resonate with it. im so unaware 

Edited January 19, 2018 by thehero

[aurum]

10 minutes ago, thehero said:

ok ill do it. why though

It's to shift what you're focusing on about him. If you do that, many of these problems will fall away.

[thehero]

@aurum

wow ok