Attachment to resolutions

[Buba]

I made a resolution for 2018, not to smoke, drink no alcohol, no daydream. Also to meditate everyday and exercise 3 times a week.

Now I get nervous, because I really dont want to deviate from my resolutions. Especially exercising is a huge burden. I know if I dont exercise 3 times a week even once, I will get discomfort and feel empty. Should I keep it like that or deviate from resolutions on purpose at least once or what should I do? Also I should mention that despite of making a resolution I daydream everyday, I would say, every second. But I still feel nervous and being forced to obey other resolutions.

[Leo-Tzu]

If it is a longterm resolution ofc you can pause it sometimes, your mindset should be "i will train for the rest of my life whenever i can" . . . Now you can 3 times a week sometimes 2 etc . . . That's how i think about resolutions not "i will train for 3 times a week for entire 2018" because you might fail, feel worse and that might take you lower than you were before. . .

[Joseph Maynor]

Dial it back before you quit.  Keep every category of thing you are doing.  If you gotta cut, cut how much you are doing things.  You need to keep your commitment to your resolution.  Quitting is the enemy of progress.  You are probably over-extending yourself, so dial back the amounts that way but keep every task on the ledger, if that makes sense.  You need to get over this hump.  It takes 60 days to form a habit.  You need to pay that price, and then it will be much easier because you'll have a wind at your back.  You're gonna have to endure a little pain for a while.  

Watch this video:

 

Edited January 18, 2018 by Joseph Maynor

[aurum]

@Buba

My gut reaction is to say you're trying to do too much at once.

Pick one of those habits and start with that. I suggest meditation.

[Sahil Pandit]

If you want to make working out easier, put a weight in your room or somewhere you see it often

[Forestluv]

When I started learning Spanish, I joined an online “90 day challenge” group. We each set study time and progress goals. We held each other accountable by updating an online progress sheet. Many people set their goals too high and burned out.

My goals were high, yet reasonable. The problem was, after two weeks it felt like work. I HAD to do it. My fascination with language and culture got zapped. My joy of learning flatlined. All obligation and checking into work. I quit the group and my zest returned.

[Buba]

I think I could not explain my situation very well. Actually exercising itself is not a problem, but attachment to it is. If I have attachment to even easy things, they become a burden for me. I feel stressed. When I wake up in the morning, I say "Today is an exercise day, I should do it. I wish evening came soon and I exercised and got rid of today's burden and felt relief.

4 hours ago, Serotoninluv said:

When I started learning Spanish, I joined an online “90 day challenge” group. We each set study time and progress goals. We held each other accountable by updating an online progress sheet. Many people set their goals too high and burned out.

My goals were high, yet reasonable. The problem was, after two weeks it felt like work. I HAD to do it. My fascination with language and culture got zapped. My joy of learning flatlined. All obligation and checking into work. I quit the group and my zest returned.

Same applies to me. When I make an obligation, something I enjoy becomes an annoying thing.

15 hours ago, Mighty Mouse said:

So what you are saying is that the reasons for exercising aren't because that's what you want to do for yourself, but because you want to avoid discomfort and feeling empty...

 

When I make resolution I make it for my health and happiness, but afterwards I get attachments to them and they become ego-feeding things. If I dont do them I feel miserable, even anxious, if I do them I feel fulfilled, does not matter if they contribute to my health and overall happiness, I dont care, I just get short joys from accomplishments. If I set a goal to do 20 push ups, but did 19, I would feel sense of lack, like something is wrong in my life. The most important thing in my life are numbers, they direct me, they tell me if I am good or bad, if I am on the right track or not.  

[student]

@Buba these should be your everyday thoughts, surpass your current self, be better, stronger. Resolutions are for lazy people. Individuals should work everyday to reach their higher self, their goal. 

I do the "work" everyday. I wouldn't even care if in a month we would all die. I would just continue to do the work. That's all individuals have to do. Drop those resolution thoughts, they just provoke in you anxiety. Time is also a complex thing. It has no measure. It has sense just in the realm of low consciousness.