My profound trip on magic truffles (Psylocybine)

[MaxV]

Greetings, 

Yesterday evening i had my first ever non-recreational psychedelic trip alone with magic truffles. This had to be one of the best and most profound experiences i had to date. 

Some background information:

- I'm in my mid 20's and born and raised in The Netherlands. Psychedelics like magic truffles are legal in here. 

 - i've done quite some substances and i've abuse some of those (alcohol, mdma).  I recently stopped using anything  because i realised i used most of these substances to run away from my insecurities. I'd only do psychedelics now and  I'm not planning to use these recreational again (after this experience i cannot understand how these are even used in a recreational way to be honest)

- i have some experience with psychedelics in the past too. But these were recreational experiences. Not anything really profound was experienced apart from some minor insights (i suddenly thought about how time is actually a strange phenomenon). The emphasis was more on the visuals themself. 

-  I always considered myself to be an outsider, had troubles fitting in, people thought i was a weird guy being diagnosed with 'adhd' etc.  Throughout my teen years i experienced alot of suffering and anxiety. I had a tendency to overthink pretty much everything and self sabotage was not uncommon to me.  I only fairly recently discovered Eckhart Tolle and Actualized.org (last year in April). This happened after i got my heart broken by someone i really really liked. This probably is because of my own fault. Through the voice in my head i selfsabotaged the situation. Acting like a needy little bitch. which ultimately lead to the situation of her never wanted to see me again.

I felt so utterly depressed by this situation that i started Googeling: how not to feel like shit. This ultimately lead me to The Power of Now and Leo's video about Self Acceptance (stop beating yourself up. And tearing yourself apart). 

Both Leo and ET blew my mind countless times. And i realized that i didn't even scratched the surface of this. Even after a year of  learning, asking questions and experiencing. But i have to say my life today is miles ahead in terms of happiness , growth and personal developement. 

 

The Preparation:

The dose was 15 grams (not dried) of 'Psilocybe Atlantis' magic truffles. I decided to make tea out of them. before the preparation i re-watched the video of Leo taking Mushrooms to give myself a better idea of what was going to happen. I felt ready to do this and was preparing the room which i wanted to trip with something to drink and eat and a bucket in case if i'd throw up. The lights are dimmed down (i have colored lights in my room) and i put some relaxing music in the background.

After everything was set into place i added the truffles to the water and waited for about 20 minutes. 

 

The Trip:

After i ingested the tea i started to feel some effects after about 20 minutes. It was a weird stoned like feeling and gradually intensified. After about an hour stuff really hit the fan and i felt my senses being sharpened in a way i never experienced before.  This sense of bliss was felt through out my body and it was like i experienced consciousness outside of my body. it literally blew my mind in a way i just can't describe. I felt a complete oneness with everything in the room. 

At this pointed i started to get into some very profound thought patterns. I can't remember them all correctly anymore (some are just so deep its just not possible to describe this through words.) but the one that really struck me was: 'Nothing matters... Nothing really matters.. There is literally nothing to be afraid of. Life is beautiful as it is. There is no point in anything we do. We should 'be' instead of just 'doing'. I had these thoughts about how pointless society as it is now actually is. And that things can be so much better without all the idiocracy. One would think this would be an extremely depressing thoughtpattern but i felt really relieved and at peace thinking this. It was a really enlightening experience. Even though i was not enlightened. 

Allthough at some point i went to the bathroom to take a piss and i noticed myself in the mirror. This was a really interesting experience. As i genuinely felt like this was 'a body' instead of 'my body' The comprehension of this idea suddenly made alot of  sense and this was also a very peacefull idea. 
Before this experience i liked the idea of what Leo tells in the Enlightenment video's. But after this experience i have a glimpse of what it actually feels like. 

At some point i was thinking about how masturbation and porn feels like (i'm on nofap experiment). If i was on a stimulant i would definitely fail the experiment.
But the thoughts about masturbation quickly subsided. I suddenly noticed how egoish decisions suddenly did not compell me at all. As if there are far greater things to be done. This is a feeling that still sticks with me now. 

I had some really interesting thought patterns and experiences after which i simply cannot put into words. The only thing i have to say that this was simply the best most pro-found experience i had so far. This easily beats the first time XTC (which was fantastic too. But diffrenlty and without the cost of feeling like utter shit after).

The day after:

It took me a while to fall asleep but i slept like a baby. When i woke up i was a stil a bit tired but i felt refreshed and clear after i had some coffee. 

It really feels like my brain had a defragmentation and is cleaned from some negativity. I really feel like this changed something in me for the better.  I realize this is only a very, VERY tiny aspect of the whole. But it surely did ignite a bigger spark in the journey of self actualization and reality.

 

 

 

 

 

[Max_V]

Amazing story, cool to find another Max_V from the Netherlands who is into self-actualization  

[Adam M]

sounds pretty profound...thanks for sharing!

[cirkussmile]

2 hours ago, Max_V said:

Amazing story, cool to find another Max_V from the Netherlands who is into self-actualization  

Lol

[phoenix666]

@MaxV thanks for sharing your experience! 

@Max_V hahaha I noticed as well, I first thought it was you 

[Max_V]

@phoenix666 hahaha, when I saw my own name pop up from another account I was like “ What the hell??”  

[phoenix666]

@Max_V it's all you interacting with yourself anyway

[MaxV]

Yeah this is an interesting coincidence. 

[Leo Gura]

@MaxV So, you've dipped your toe in the rabbit hole...

Careful not to get cocky with them. They will skullfuck you if given the chance.