17 year old dating 26 year old

[LuukL]

Hey, I've been reading this forum for a long time but never really had a trouble worth discussing until now.

I drove a girl home around newyears because if I didn't she had to go home on bike by herself in the middle of the night, which seemed a bad idea to me.

After that she started to kiss me and I kind of went along with it.

The problem is I found out that she's becoming 18 in 2 weeks, she told me that when she came over again the next day.

Now I'm getting all anxious about this age difference and that I'm doing something really wrong here, but she keeps texting me. Last thing I want to do is hurt her feelings but I should quit this right ??

How would you go about ending this ?

 

ps. please dont judge me, I know I must be really immature for a 26 year old.

pss. I should also note that I know her brother pretty well..

Edited January 5, 2018 by LuukL
typo

[Max_V]

Trust your judgement. 

If you think you like this girl and she is 18 you could give it a shot. Don't blindly buy into the cultural assumption that the people who date should be close in age. My aunt and uncle met the same way. He was 28 and she was 18. Although at first this may seem weird, they don't care about it. They are happily living together without worrying about that stuff.

So contemplate it for yourself, without taking other people's opinion into account. Do you want to have a relationship with her. yes or no? 

Don't wait long with this. Be decisive and don't play with her emotions.

[sgn]

What do you see as bad or wrong about the age difference?

Edited January 5, 2018 by sgn

[LuukL]

8 minutes ago, Max_V said:

Trust your judgement. 

If you think you like this girl and she is 18 you could give it a shot. Don't blindly buy into the cultural assumption that the people who date should be close in age. My aunt and uncle met the same way. He was 28 and she was 18. Although at first this may seem weird, they don't care about it. They are happily living together without worrying about that stuff.

So contemplate it for yourself, without taking other people's opinion into account. Do you want to have a relationship with her. yes or no? 

Don't wait long with this. Be decisive and don't play with her emotions.

Thanks for your response.

If it really comes down to it no I don't think I want a relationship with her, but I do enjoy her company.

Perhaps I should ask her what she wants from me the next time I see her.. and if she just wants to have fun then its all good right ?

[LuukL]

On 05/01/2018 at 1:54 AM, sgn said:

What do you see as bad or wrong about the age different?

Thanks for the response.

Nothing myself, but I am not mentally strong enough yet to beat against society.

And when I google my situation I see alot of negative responses and it makes me feel guilty/ashamed.

I suppose theres truth in that. I got my own place and she is still in school.

[LuukL]

1 hour ago, blazed said:

You don't even want a relationship with her so what are you doing?  Have you told her that? You should be honest as much as possible so she can make the right decisions too.

Thanks for the reply.

You are right I have to be honest so that is what I did.

I told her I got the feeling she wanted a relationship and that I don't see that happening. She agreed and told me she didn't either. Its just casual fun.

So my chest is now alot lighter

 

[Spiral]

She is a adult legally if she is 18 right? I would also find it strange but if you both want to, what's the harm?

If the brother is a close friend you might want to reconsider.

[BobbyLowell]

Oh buddy. Women get emotionally attatched with sex. If it's just for fun can't you just find someone else your age?

[Ruby White]

The main question is do you really like or have interest in this person?

You do want to end it because of lack of interest (apart from the sexual interest) and are using age difference as an excuse?

Because the way you speak you don't seem that "into it"... that should be your first cue.

My mom married my 36 years old dad at 19 and my god parents have 29 years apart in age. She was 17 when they started dating and they've been together for over 50 years now. That never stopped them from loving each other and sharing an awesome life.

[pluto]

Age does not define maturity as grades don't measure intelligence. If the Love is authentic, all the answers will be clear and effortless

 

[Key Elements]

On 05/01/2018 at 2:09 AM, LuukL said:

Nothing myself, but I am not mentally strong enough yet to beat against society.

This sentence of yours really caught my attention. I could really relate to it. I've been married almost 20 yrs, married in my early 20s. Both have to be mentally / financially stable to go through with it. Both have to literally not care what anyone else thinks. The relationship is between the two ppl, not the two ppl and other's opinions. The couple's attitude would have to be: other's opinions of our age difference, "race" difference (whatever that means), "religious" difference (whatever that means), or where we live in this world, etc., doesn't count. It's none of their business because they don't know what's going on. (In other words: dropping ppl in categories and gossiping about others.)

[ADD]

Going against the norms can be used as spiritual challenge. I mean your ego wont want you to be in a relationship that is seen as bad in society. This helps you differentiate between ego and authentic self.

[Chives99]

your both over the age of consent so I don't an issue in that regard You may find that your paths will  go in very different directions with age gaps at this age

[Shroomdoctor]

26 and 18 arent even that far apart. She's an Adult so who cares if she is a tad younger than you?