How To Learn About Relationships?

[Rosie]

Hey all,

Im interested, what was the best material you used on relationships and dating? I'm trying to learn much about this theme but can't really find real good materials. How to date? How to find love? or even just general relationships. Any recommendation is highly appreciated,

Next time I decide to get into a relationship I want to know what am I doing and how do I affect the other person. I would like to learn about human behaviour as much as posisible.

[T1r1on]

I'm sure Leo has some stuff on his book list. Honestly, I'm looking fornthe same thing. If I run into anything I'll be sure to share it.

[kalter000]

Step one: have relationships (or try to attend them somehow).
Step two: be mindful. Let the life to give you necessary lessons and through careful introspection find hidden sticking points.
Step three: as you become aware of them most will fix themselves.
Step four: find material for specific problems, that have stood unfixed . 

Best material is your own experience, I'm not a fond of seeking resolutions for non existent problems. Broad answer for broad question.

[Rosie]

2 hours ago, kalter000 said:

Step one: have relationships (or try to attend them somehow).
Step two: be mindful. Let the life to give you necessary lessons and through careful introspection find hidden sticking points.
Step three: as you become aware of them most will fix themselves.
Step four: find material for specific problems, that have stood unfixed . 

Best material is your own experience, I'm not a fond of seeking resolutions for non existent problems. Broad answer for broad question.

I do not agree on this. I think learning this is absolutely possible. I do have relationships but i would like to better at them...

[kalter000]

@Rosie I didn't say it's impossible. In your relationship notice every time when you or your partner get triggered and be mindful of that. Ask yourself "Why am I feeling it? What struck my nerve in this situation? Why am I feeling insecure or fearful right now? Oooh, perhaps because of this, that, etc".
The more you notice these situations, the more you have control over them and start acting in positive manner, more consciously. It's almost like behavioral therapy. 

[Truth]

I think understanding yourself on a deep level is key here. but there are some really good books. - 5 love languages by Gary Chapman (how to love others and what people do that make you feel loved.) sadly most of the things I know are for guys and the topics are deep. I recommend you find a system, how to be a women, gender roles, biggest mistakes, breaking up, all that good stuff. Start googling

[Guest]

Most relationship advice online is for guys since they tend to be far more clueless. Be okay with this, you can learn a ton by putting yourself in the guy's shoes. 

Here are some good places to start:

Coach Corey Wayne

AttractionInstitute

Dr.Nerdlove

GirlsChase

 

By understanding the male perspective,you'll have a better idea of what's going on inside his head. However, the most important thing you can do is work on yourself and keep self-actualizing.

[Dhana Choko]

There are a lot of good relationship books out there. 

I recommend for starters:

• 5 love languages
• Brene Brown: Daring Greatly
• Seven Principles to make a Marriage work
  
  There are so many more. Amazon will help you!

[Guest]

Learn the 5 love languages  Best you read the whole book. Watch all videos from Leo on this topics, watch even those that is directed towards men. 

Then also Coach Corey Wayne like I said before, Maybe watch Teal Swans take on masculine and feminine essence.

[FindingPeace]

On 26/02/2016 at 7:47 PM, Rosie said:

Next time I decide to get into a relationship I want to know what am I doing and how do I affect the other person.

Be yourself. Be authentic, don't pretend to be something you're not to impress the other person or get them to like you.

You don't need to 'affect' the other person. They will either like you for who you are, or they won't. If they do, great. If they don't, so what? Move on.

You don't need rules or techniques. These are just tools for manipulating the situation and the other person. For manufacturing a relationship.

A relationship needs to happen naturally. It cannot be forced or manufactured. That won't last.

Leo has a great video on "How to be attractive". Lots of good advice there.

[Artemis]

The Thinking Girl's Guide to the Right Guy by Joanne Davila and Kaycee Lashman. Literally the next best thing to taking a class on how to date as a woman. I cannot recommend it enough.