5 meo Trip Buenos Aires #3

[Nexeternity]

Not sure how to write this trip report.

This trip really showed me how superficial my other trips were.  Yes I reached some nice states, some healing was done for sure, I got great insights and my consciousness was raised.  

But this trip really humbled me.  Like stunned me into surrender.

I really wanted to go as far as I could in the trip.  I intended to die and would try to not put up a fight to the medicine and the shaman.

The shaman was amazing.  He started working through all the layers of ego in my body.  

I screamed in murderous rage.

I cried in heartbreaking fashion, like a mother who lost her child.

There is a little kid inside me that has been very hurt.

I saw how much resistance I really live with.  It's so amazing, I had no idea I had all that in me, I was so unconscious to it.

Its all in the body, the chest, stomach, legs and arms.  So much tension, stored fear, sadness, anger.

The shaman pinned me and opened me up masterfully, guiding me on.

He told me to scream loud.  He told me to cry.  That real men, that warriors cry.

He guided me to ask for forgiveness and to be grateful.

Not in a guru or dogmatic type way, I really felt I needed to say sorry to God for how arrogant I have been.

At the end I jumped for joy, “I am free, I am free”  I felt infinite happiness.

But of course the ego has come back, though with a dent in it.

There is soooo much work to do.  I am totally asleep, now I realize this.

I am really grateful for everything.

Thank you.

[Leo Gura]

@Nexeternity Man, you are on a 5-MeO roll.

[Visionary]

Beautiful bro. This shows how much healing/shadow work is a crucial part of this journey. Much love.