How do I get over the fear that I am unlovable?

[BobbyLowell]

I think that I know that I am lovable but maybe I don't know for sure. How do I get over this? People in my life are giving me cues that I am unable to be loved. I love myself but then my friend (a horrible one) gave me cues that no one else can love me. I'm sure of these cues it's not like I'm just being insecure plz don't tell me that. 

[Ether]

@BobbyLowell Ask it: Is it true? Could someone else have a different opinion? If they can, how am I sure my perspective is true? Then which perspective true? Whats the truth?

[BobbyLowell]

What?how will this help???????? @EtherI have asked myself that!!

[Ether]

@BobbyLowell You probably  havent. Do it again. If you find out that your is not true, your attention leaves the thought, and you wont be bothered by that one again.

[BobbyLowell]

What??? Are you saying I might not be lovable???? @Ether

Edited December 22, 2017 by BobbyLowell

[Ether]

@BobbyLowell You arent lovable or unlovable. You just are, those are concepts, they arent real. Can you find lovable or unlovable on yourself? Try to find it. In your room, is there any lovable or unlovable?

 

If you think you are lovable, can someone think differently? If you think you are unlovable, can someone think differently?

If there is "evidence (imaginary) evidence on both sides, how can you say you are one of those concepts? You are neitheir! Your true nature is beyond that. You true nature is silence. When you ask: "WHat am I?" You cant find anything, only silence. Thats what you are. Your true nature is stronger than any concept ever invented. Hope this helps.

[BobbyLowell]

!!!!im not asking existentially though, I'm asking about before that . First according to Maslow hierarchy or needs you need love then the self actualization stuff. I mean in the world I live in, I am not enlightened . Like say people existed

[Ether]

@BobbyLowell Love cant fulfill you.

[BobbyLowell]

@Ether BUT IM TALKING ABOUT IT. I WANT TO KNOW THAT LIKR PEOPLE CAN LOVE ME. IT MATTERS TO ME!!!!!!!

[Ether]

@BobbyLowell Of course people can love you. But that doesnt make you lovable. Action \=\ Concept

 

Your parents love you, your friends love you. Why do you think you cant be loved? Everyone can love you. Crowds can applaud you, rural people can like you, NBA players can appreciate you. All of this is possible.

How do we know this? We can always look at similiar people who achieved the same things. Can you find an example of a person who taught he was unlovable and then people loved him? Try to find that example.

 

[BobbyLowell]

@Ether ok that's what I'm asking, thank you so much❤️❤️

[Ether]

@BobbyLowell I like to help people. It also helps me with my explaining and contemplation.

[Ian]

Life is giving you exactly the lesson you need, but it looks like you need a bit of help interpreting it! So well done for seeking advice - you are truly wise.

 

6 hours ago, BobbyLowell said:

People in my life are giving me cues that I am unable to be loved.

You see events in your life, but I feel your perception of them is clouded. This is the universe letting you know that only you can provide yourself with all the love you need and are worthy of. You are ready to receive this understanding, and so it is being made known to you, both through your direct experience, and through these words I type.

 

6 hours ago, BobbyLowell said:

I love myself but then my friend (a horrible one) gave me cues that no one else can love me

This is a simple test. When people give you shit, can you find the strength to love yourself even more than before? As counter-intuitive as it sounds, the more your heart is broken into tiny little pieces by your heart-breaking interactions with others, the more you are able to open yourself up to true love. In moments when life cuts you down, you deserve more love, not less. Give that gift to yourself. Each devastating blow to your heart is an opportunity to become more resilient and more self-loving.

 

Know that the actions of other people are simply a reflection of where they are at in their journey. If they do not have the strength to love themselves relentlessly, what makes you think that they can show you any love? You are not unloveable - you are simply surrounded by people in immense pain that they are not even aware of. If you can realize that, then you can love them (in addition to yourself) without expecting anything in return, as your gift of healing to the world.

Thank you for helping me.

May you be blessed with the most tender love

 

 

[Ian]

5 hours ago, Ether said:

@BobbyLowell Love cant fulfill you.

@Ether I acknowledge your pain.

[heisenburger]

@BobbyLowell bobby try this.

https://mega.nz/#!ntBVCQIa!QBDmqgmWKzD6MC77p8p9L5csWNo4V5c4tolRMfpcyr4

[heisenburger]

@heisenburger https://mega.nz/#!j5YERT6B!NikNo1QLKKvoJShUFI_-iUeCJRSuYB53XqSc6tA2M4o

[h inandout]

You see this little baby?  That's what you used to look like!  

Tell me, when did God decide that these beautiful little baby being should grow up into detestable adults? 

Look at the way you are telling stories in your head.  Seriously. Like step outside yourself, and review the past period of time that this unloveable feeling has been growing.  Not calling you a liar, but it's okay to let loose the chains of paranoia for a minute to see that maybe some of those events where people didn't show you love, were pretty explainable.  Like my big brother, when we were kids, always thought I was annoying because I would ask the same questions that he had asked three years ago.  Pretty understandable.  Does that make me unloveable.  No.  Did it make me believe I was unloveable.  Yeah, it really did.  Until I started studying all this stuff.

Do you really wanna manifest something incredible?  This is my challenge to you: next time you are gonna be out amongst people, wear a t-shirt that says lovable.  The whole day.  Without shame.  Just be normal old you!

[h inandout]

Something I wanna add, is the the most powerful way to flush out old limiting beliefs is to do something to directly counteract it.  Pick someone random in your life and do something real gosh darn sweet for them, just for the sake of seeing them smile.  

[Faceless]

What is Love? 

One way to tell is what love is not? 

If we can’t narrow down what Love is how do we know if we love or if we are in the presence of love? 

Edited December 23, 2017 by Faceless

[sgn]