Why do book, videogame, movie endings leave me empty inside?

[Serge]

Hi guys!

I didn't pay it much attention in the past, but now it's something very dominant in my life. 

The time I experience the most powerful emotions is when I watch/experience/think about these fictional worlds.

Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, Harry Potter, Disney and Pixar movies, dozens of books and videogame campaigns. Those amazing adventures, full of emotion and life. Sacrificing your life for a higher purpose, doing good for others... Very beautiful things, but, at the same time, very sad. Thoughts like "I wish I lived in those special worlds", "I wish I did something meaningful", "I wish I was surrounded py people like those from these worlds". 

It's enough for me to listen to a LOTR soundtrack and I get very emotional and, at the same time, feel a huge void inside me. So the experience is kind of "negative" for me.

It's like nothing I do in my "everyday life" even compares to those strong emotional impulses.

Could you please guys share your points of view on this? I would really appreciate a view from a side on this one. Thanks!

Edited December 15, 2017 by Serge

[Shin]

You expect them to fulfill you, which they can't.

Spend more time on your life purpose, then video games/movies will be fun again, as a hobby.

Edited December 15, 2017 by Shin

[Serge]

@Shin Yes, I know they can't. And I don't think I do expect them to fulfill me. I think it's more the case that I expect reality to be as one of those worlds and it's not.

@blazed Probably I wouldn't. But definitely a part of me wishes I could. Also... maybe reality doesn't have to be the way it is? I don't know...

I just think this void and those emotions are trying to tell me something about me. I just don't know how to interpret it.

[Adam M]

I used to experience similar things and I would crave to play engrossing rpg games like WOW 

@Shin is right...they won't fulfill you 

[Shin]

7 minutes ago, Serge said:

@Shin Yes, I know they can't. And I don't think I do expect them to fulfill me. I think it's more the case that I expect reality to be as one of those worlds and it's not.

Subconsciously, you still do, otherwise you wouldn't feel empty, you would just stop playing and do something else.

[Serge]

@Shin I mean, I don't have craving to watch a movie/play a video game. Not at all. Actually, I haven't played video games for a couple of years now. And movies, maybe I would watch one or two per week. Actually, sometimes it can be quite emotioanlly painful for me to watch a movie I love, think of a videogame ending, because I know that after that, for a couple of hours/days I'll feel empty.

What bothers me is this strong emotional impulse. Why do I have the strongest emotions namely in this scenario?

Or, maybe you're right and it's my ego defending right now. Idk..

[hundreth]

I used to have similar feelings about comic books, wanting to have mutant powers like an X-Men and help people. I definitely had a phase of my life where I felt like I was stuck, and not having deep, meaningful experiences. Over time, just following your standard school -> job -> career trajectory I was presented with several calls to action and adventure. I had to choose to accept these. Choose to leave the corporate job for a Start Up. Choose to leave the start up and move my entire life to Israel for a year and a half. Choose to travel, experiment with psychedelics, have an intense relationship, etc. Over time I found out the real world is just as magical and adventurous as those fictional worlds are. 

Will those adventures bring you ultimate fulfillment? No, but they will teach you 1000x more than sitting around and reading on the internet will. Life has beaten me with a stick so many times, it's the ultimate teacher.  Just be ready for those calls to action, and when adventure calls, make sure to pick up the phone and accept!

[LaucherJunge]

@Serge It is pretty much all a matter of dopamine. Are you sure that there is nothing in your life that gives you high states, like porn for example? In general it could be any addiction which gives you those highes and automatically makes you dull about anything else in life.

[Serge]

@LaucherJunge I don't know.. I think it's because life doesn't generally make me happy. I'd say I'm in some form of a mild depression.

I think practicing gratitude and love would help in my situation. 

Maybe those powerful emotions are telling me that it's possible to feel this beauty in my everyday life. Maybe they show me my potential.

[LaucherJunge]

@Serge Beauty is the highest expression of ourselves in physical form. Truth is the highest expression of ourselves in the form of the mind. Love is the highest expression of ourselves in form of feelings. Those are the things everyone is motivated by if you break it down, find your form or forms of expression.

[Leo Gura]

4 hours ago, Serge said:

I expect reality to be as one of those worlds and it's not.

You're right, reality is infinitely better and bigger than those worlds. All those world are a tiny subset of actual reality.

But you are too lazy to actualize it.

You only get what you give from life. You haven't given enough to it yet to experience its magic. You expect magic to be delivered to you on a silver platter because modern society has made you lazy and weak.

[Serge]

@Leo Gura That's exactly what I needed to hear. Thank you.

"I haven't given enough"

This resonates with me really deep. Let's start my "giving" adventure! 

[Nahm]

@Serge The themes of the movies are almost all the same. There is oppression, and there is liberation. You love the liberation, we all do. You have not learned to love the oppression. They are two sides of the same coin. One with the other, One without the other. Bring them into your ‘real life’. See the oppression for what it is, and you will be without fear, without doubt, and without suffering - as the characters are when their journeys are complete. They all strive to overcome what is without, and yet rejoice in having overcome what is within.           Reality is far more magical than could ever be depicted in a movie.

[Serge]

@Nahm So beautifully written. Thank you very much. Really

[Nahm]

@Serge Thank you, really! I didn’t know that answer until I read your post. 

[art]

@Leo Gura Is everyday a magical day for you, Sir?

[Shin]

20 minutes ago, GlenCurtis said:

Oh, dude, I feel the same thing. It happens only when I am reading/watching/playing something really good and qualitative. It happened when I ended to read the Martin's book "A song of Ice and Fire" and it happened again recently, when I stopped playing Diablo 2. I think that this game is perfect, and it's sad that I am not playing it anymore. I remember this good old days when I my character was the strongest one, because I have bought some cool items on d2king.com. It was great time.

Yeah I think it's basically what I said

You could just sit and enjoy reality, and it will be way more amazing
It just so happens that we are used to think not doing anything or just relaxing is for lazy person, or friendless person, but the truth is that once you do that, you can't lie to yourself for very long about your true identity.

Then you can still play or watch whatever, and you'll enjoy it even more, because you'd be already complete and whole, so the end of it won't be painful.
Any other experience is experienced fully for what it is, rather than for what you seek in it to feel complete (which can't be done since you already are complete).

That's also when true relationships can happen, before that, there is always an underlying need from it on some level, and now you can just appreciate whatever relationship you have, regardless if it will last or not

 

[Spaceofawareness]

So, what’s the difference between an awesome game or movie, and your current real life reality?

In those movies or games we all know and love, the main character is faced with some kind of ultimatum, and events conspire to force them into an adventure, where they discover they are more capable than they could have ever imagined.

They are forced out of their comfort zone, compelled by some looming catastrophe to act.

In real life its a bit different, there is no looming catastrophe, things are pretty comfortable and stable, we go to our jobs or study etc, we come home to relative comfort, there are no great challenges or obstacles. 

As Leo has been telling us, we need to find something we really care about, that will take us out of our comfort zone, push us to become more than we currently are, for something greater than ourselves.