I don't deserve to be happy

[Ryan_047]

That right there is the most damaging limiting belief I have.I realized that today.This is why is so hard for me to do anything..I can barely get myself to meditate and study..why become a better person if I don't deserve it?

Yeah yeah..I know that beliefs are not necessarily true(most of the time) but that doesn't help me.

I am dealing with self hatred..I honestly believe that the world would have been such a better place without me in it,and I haven't done anything horrible to anybody.I also procrastinate on everything..even eating or playing a fucking video game.I bought Psycho Cybernetics a few weeks ago..read only 1 chapter ever since.

I am really stuck I don't know what to do.I tried Leo's visualization on self acceptance for a couple of weeks,with no effect.Tried the visualization on contemplating my own death.. didn't impressed me..at least if I die I won't suffer anymore...

What does it take for someone to deserve happiness?What does it take for someone to deserve anything really?

Edited December 10, 2017 by Ryan_047

[Rinne]

17 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

What does it take for someone to deserve happiness?What does it take for someone to deserve anything really?

Nothing... really. I person can be happy just cause they can. Check out Leos video on authentic happiness. 

 

19 minutes ago, Ryan_047 said:

at least if I die I won't suffer anymore...

Stay strong. You got this. 

Advice:

1. Meditate consistently even if its only 10 minutes everyday.
2. Drink a lot of water. 
3. Breathe consciously.

Take it or leave it. 

sweatergoat//lit

[Rinne]

A person*. And actually this is the video. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5WSlkzz2_Bk also check out this video too https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgvVEW3XEo8

 

 

[Faceless]

To seek happiness is conflict. To avoid sorrow is conflict. So what’s left?

To accept that there are times of sadness and there are times of happiness 

Use this pain u have to energize your inquiry into why you are having these thoughts, fellings, and conclusions about yourself. 

Learn about who and what u are. This learning never ends 

??

 

Edited December 10, 2017 by Faceless

[YaNanNallari]

Watch Leo's newest video. Then see that you can go full circle on this and realize that nobody deserves anything, so you're free to receive anything from life.

[Ryan_047]

@Rinne @Rinne I am meditating 20 minutes every day.

Could you please talk about more about consciously breathing?How and when do you do that?

[Guest Young Padawan]

I've been there, I think you need to let go of everything, because you don't really have to do anything, because you can't even do anything.

Happiness is not the goal, it might seem so, the aim of life is not to feel happy (though you can) or to make success or to achieve anything etc..

Have sometime with yourself, enjoy being alone, do whatever you like, sleep well, try to go to gym, try new lifestyles, change your daily routines, discipline yourself, don't expect anything from others or from life, don't stress yourself about getting results because you can't do anything about it. But more importantly: don't believe me and don't believe anyone, you're on your own, it's your life, not others' and you have to do the work alone.

Another tip: watch many episodes from Leo's, they can be really helpful.

@Ryan_047

Edited December 10, 2017 by Mahmoud Bishr Kebbeh

[Rinne]

@Ryan_047 20 minutes? Thats amazing bro. Keep it up. Your on the right track. 

Heres the breathing technique. DEFINITELY out your own free will look into it. It works miracles for all facets of life. Heres a link. If you find anymore depth to any new breathing techniques let me know. Please lol. 

Dont know if you remember me but this is mercy lol.

sweater//where is she?

[Leo Gura]

@Ryan_047 You have classic low self-esteem.

That's a big obstacle that you need to seriously work out before you can move forward with other work.

Do all the exercises in Nathaniel Branden's books on self-esteem. That's your solution. Take the exercises seriously and do them daily for a whole year. That should lead to a significant improvement.

Also, I would recommend a few years of daily Holosync for you.

[Faceless]

@Mahmoud Bishr Kebbeh ....Be alone is right 

We have to be a light to ourselves ??

[In Progress]

Even if you don't deserve to be happy, the people around you deserve to have a happier and more self-actualized you. If you can't do it for yourself then do it for them.

[Faceless]

Low self esteem can be eradicated in seconds  

If anyone sees with there whole being the nature of the self image “ego” this alone should be enough to let go of such negative/positive beliefs about oneslf. If this is fully grasped, not as an idea but so strong that it’s a fact then observation through subjectivity becomes identifiable and is properly realized after direct perception is distorted by thought.  

From what I experience is that this process seems to be changing in that the distortion of thought is avoided all together. It becomes more natural and I catch this distortion before it occurs . I don’t even notice that it happens sometimes. 

For a while there was no sense of me whatsoever and it was rather nice. But there are reasons why I have to have one foot in the subjective realm and the other in the objective realm. As much as I love living without the center I feel balance is necessary. 

Although I do spend more time in the timeless state and know the me is just a big act. 

 

[beastmode]

@Ryan_047 you're thinking about this the wrong way. That's not a limiting belief. That's actually exactly what you should be thinking. You don't deserve anything! Expecting that you deserve anything is being a victim. Realize that everything is in your control. 

https://www.actualized.org/articles/how-to-stop-being-a-victim

https://www.actualized.org/articles/understanding-responsibility-vs-blame

ugotdis bro

[Sevi]

@Ryan_047 look this pretty girl has a message for you :

[Sevi]

@Ryan_047 of course you deserve to be happy and loved, it's as simple as that:) and most probably more than most of the other folks.. but seems like you are so hard on yourself, and not appreciating your efforts.. why not though? Giving a little breather, a bit of self-appreciation? Looks like you need yourself more than anything else but somehow you are behaving mean to yourself by not being with yourself.. it's really not necessary, stop punishing yourself like that, you are a beautiful creature.

[Jamie Universe]

Ok.

So right now your dead on the inside. What do you do? 

Well first you should realize that you beating yourself up isn't some solid part of reality. You mentioned the thing about belief and how there sorta of not true. Well that part of the equation reveals all. To me at least, and I'd imagine everyone one else (though honestly I'm not sure). has a belief system.

 

And right now you have a belief saying "I don't deserve anything good." Those things Leo put out about affirmations and visualizations are used to change you. And at least apart of them is to change your belief. But I mean you can't just be told information and expect it to work. If you really want to change a belief or opinion, you've got to be convinced to.

 

A belief has some properties. It can be changed. Its sort of like a reaction machine, where based on (blank) I'll do (blank). In your case "Based on (I'm not worthy) I'll do/be (sad/other negative emotions)".  

A belief also has no cosmic importance, or magical truth to it. Which basically means that the term 'deserve' is a human construct, and not some unknown magical force, which some ideological people have. 

 

 

Don't underestimate the belief part of this. If you yourself go out there and just sit down and contemplate what a belief is, you'll be able to see like me how many things people say and believe are based upon beliefs and how much it affects their emotions. (And don't think this means that peoples ideologies are somehow not meaningful.) 

But realizing how much of yourself is belief alone you can use that truth as evidence to convince and change so much in your life to be better. 

 

[Nahm]

@Ryan_047 who decides these things?

[Joseph Maynor]

On 12/10/2017 at 3:22 AM, Ryan_047 said:

That right there is the most damaging limiting belief I have.I realized that today.This is why is so hard for me to do anything..I can barely get myself to meditate and study..why become a better person if I don't deserve it?

Yeah yeah..I know that beliefs are not necessarily true(most of the time) but that doesn't help me.

I am dealing with self hatred..I honestly believe that the world would have been such a better place without me in it,and I haven't done anything horrible to anybody.I also procrastinate on everything..even eating or playing a fucking video game.I bought Psycho Cybernetics a few weeks ago..read only 1 chapter ever since.

I am really stuck I don't know what to do.I tried Leo's visualization on self acceptance for a couple of weeks,with no effect.Tried the visualization on contemplating my own death.. didn't impressed me..at least if I die I won't suffer anymore...

What does it take for someone to deserve happiness?What does it take for someone to deserve anything really?

Have you snapped back into things yet!