should one try to get a girlfriend?

[Principium Nexus]

How about replacing it with the sentence, should one try fall in love? "To get a girlfriend" feels so materialistic, sounds like we are shopping around ?

[Goliath]

I think you should put yourself in and enviroment where you are having fun and there is a good chance of meeting people. THe activity should be fun tho, without you having to meet anybody, otherwise you just do it for the motive (girlfirend) and not for the activities sake.

This might be easier said than done, but I would argure that it produces the best results. Also how this looks for you is completely up to you. My advice would be to look at all of your interests, write them down, and try to find groups in your area that do some kind of events. You then simply go to the events for the events sake (cuz the event is interesting to you!) and then you meet people by luck.  And these people should all have something in common with you, so thats a good start...

[Girzo]

You know, the moment that desire to have a girlfriend is wasting more of your time than actually getting one is the moment you take action and go for it.

Having a girlfriend is fun. If the self-development journey is not giving you enough fulfillment yet (and it's not as I see it from the very fact that you are asking this question), then a girlfriend is exactly what you need. There's no point in making life a torture, so if your life is dull right now I would say go and find yourself a partner.

As to how, I find old materials of Leo very useful. He points out there the most common problems guys have: being needy; not going out and being social; not approaching women; difficulty talking to women; not being immediately sexual enough; not taking the lead; not closing the deal; and having a bad text game. Contemplate and work on those and everything will turn out naturally. You don't need to perfect at all of those, but the more, the higher your chances.

[WaveInTheOcean]

have you ever had a girlfriend?

"One of my biggest fears is wasting time"

" personal development is more important to me than having a girlfriend,"

If you've never had an actual girlfriend, then I feel I should tell you that having one will develop you in ways you can't imagine.

"“When you are in relationship with people, in a thousand and one ways you are provoked, challenged, seduced. Again and again you come to know your pitfalls, your limitations, your anger, your lust, your possessiveness, your jealousy, your sadness, your happiness all moods come and go, you are constantly in a turmoil. But this is the only way to know who you are" - Osho.

[Viking]

@Girzo @WaveInTheOcean I discovered during this post that I have no desire for a girlfriend really, but I have the desire to feel love. By aiming to have a girlfriend im missing the point. I believe that if I get a girlfriend from an active pursuit I wont feel that love, because love I think cant be forced. Aiming for a relationship would be counterproductive because it's not the relationship that I want, I want the love, and the love comes spontaneously.

[vizual]

[Girzo]

@Ilya Ego tries many different things to avoid getting hurt. I think you are lying to yourself. If you didn't want a girlfriend you wouldn't be here asking this question. Drop the narration and see what's left. That is what you really want. Don't tell me what it is, don't write it here, but answer for yourself.