Ignoring People & My Resistance To Improve With Women

[kieranperez]

So I'm facing an issue right now. I don't feel that needy for a relationship. I mean, I want an authentic one but I don't find myself feeling desperate by any means. I tend to feel really lonely but that I've really started to learn that that's just me being so out of place with simply being which @Leo Gura has talked about in the past. Now that I'm about to start my journey with Enlightenment, that's something I know I'm going to get a lot better with in time. 

However, I notice I'm totally ignoring people and relationships now at this point and not wanting to work on my skills with women. I'm confident with my looks so it's not really an issue with that. I know I'm a good looking dude that knows how to dress well and all that. I just feel so out of place though socially. I'm noticing I'm becoming more and more introverted. Which I know is not a bad thing. Hell, it feels more real now. Yeah I get lonely but hell, I have mastered myself yet so I don't expect myself to be perfect.

I just out of touch because I don't feel in contact with anyone though. Like, I'm just not putting myself out there. I can make easy conversation but I don't even feel compelled to flirt anymore. The more work I try to do on myself, the more out of touch I feel with people. I do want an authentic relationship but at the same time, I don't feel compelled to go out there. I think part of it has to do with insecurity that I don't have anything going in my life yet. Like, I still live with my dad and little brother and 22 so I guess I'm concerned with the way I come off. I feel like I'm not a true independent man yet. I guess I just don't feel like I have much to show for myself. I'm kinda at a cross roads where I'm questioning all the things I thought I was passionate about but seem so trivial now so I don't really know what to say about myself now. 

Again though, because of all that I'm just totally ignoring people now. This has been good in a way because now I've really been shown that the people who I thought were my best friends really aren't since they don't bother ever reaching out to me. A tough reality but a helpful one nonetheless. 

I think what has me feeling stuck is my own sense of lack of substance and stuff to offer. So I just feel so unmotivated to be out there anymore. I'm scared I guess too.

[Spiral]

Flirt not because you want to attract someone but instead for fun. Self-amusement done right.

Where you active before socially and with the ladies?

[kieranperez]

9 hours ago, Spiral said:

Where you active before socially and with the ladies?

Not sure what that means or if that was a typo... Are you asking if I've been social with girls in the past? A little confused

[Spiral]

@kieranperez I mean: Were you a hanging out with lots of people and having success with girls before.  So things have gotten worse or did you not and now don't feel the need to improve. (but you want to rationally) 

I mean because you said "I don't even feel compelled to flirt anymore".  So I assumed you did feel compelled, but I don't know of you did actually flirt in the past.

Typo my mistake.

Moving out would absolutely help, independence is really important and not just for the sake of getting girls.