Isn't Meditation Itself Self-inquiry?

[Edvard]

As I'm able to shut my mind down more and more, I get deeper and deeper insights about every meditation session, although it generally goes up and down. It's been a good week.

Just wnt to share my experiences and some thoughts about all those techniques, because getting enlightened, to me really seems extremely simple (not necessarily easy though). Two things:

- don't think, which means train the mind to get better at that skill, and become present.

- dare to not think, and become one with everything. Dare to release.

So to sum it up: don't think.

At my peak moments I sort of become more and more aware of me thinking about becoming aware, and then aware about me thinking about thinking about being aware. It's almost like it's spiraling more and more into an emergence with the thoughts and awareness to eventually become one, and it also seems to me that because this spiral can always become smaller, means there are many, maybe infinite levels or degrees to how close to clomplete emptyness you can become. And it goes deeper and lasts longer for me every session (some periods, including this week). At the peaks I had today, I got to the point of liberation, and I think it's the best experience I've ever had. Still scary to the ego though. I sometimes put in a thought saying «I'm ready to die, just surrender», and some thoughts about what reality is may pop in. I have to dig deep for subconscious assumptions like the self-image, too. And by deep concentration I get to the states of more and more emptyness, or whatever you'll call it. There probably are some more insights to be had, you don't know after all. I don't get the insight of consciousnesses «splitting», as some, at least Leo, claims. So not quite sure about this oneness, although I feel one with every sensation from the same perspective, sure. But I don't see some friend outside my house, thinking that I am him. I don't know what happened before the Big Bang either, as some seems to «know». That's like reality says something conceptual to you, like «you are one with everything. You are Jesus». I'm just saying it, because I think it may be easy to becone dogmatic about these things. You hear all these concepts about what the Truth is. I'm certainly open to me being everyone else, but that's probably a much deeper insight than what I'm currently having. I'm probably still scratching the surface.

I'm not saying I'm enlightened (certainly not as I write), but I think I can see where it's going: more emptyness, and less centeredness. To me it doesn't even seem to be a sudden thing, but a gradual. I guess jumps can be made, and maybe somebody sees it without training, like Eckhart Tolle, but even he hasn't probably reached the rock bottom, if bottom even exists. 

I also wonder, how can you ever get enlightened by self inquiry, when that process seem to require thinking? I tend to mix it a little with meditation, and sometimes just try to be conscious of what reality is during a peak moment from time to time. I mean, isn't meditation that anyway? Why need a separate technique for just asking conceptual questions? Nothing wrong with asking now and then, but setting aside 1hr every day?

And lastly, of course, one doesn't know anything, including me.

 

Edited November 4, 2017 by Edvard

[Leo Gura]

4 hours ago, Edvard said:

I also wonder, how can you ever get enlightened by self inquiry, when that process seem to require thinking?

A) Self-inquiry isn't really about thinking. The thinking portion of it is mostly to get the mind looking silently in the right direction. Advanced forms of self-inquiry involve no thinking, or very little thinking.

B) It actually IS possible to think your way into enlightenment. The way that works is, you think until the mind suddenly thinks a thought which sends into an unexpected tailspin straight into The Void. Sort of like when you're talking to a friend about something and then you suddenly realize you left your kitchen stove on. You get this shocking "Oh fuck!!!" moment.

C) Thinking can also exhaust itself. After lots of thinking, the mind gets tired and surrenders to non-thinking.

D) As you get better at self-inquiry, it will start to look more and more like meditation, and vice versa.

[Source_Mystic]

@Leo Gura Zen koans operate in such a way. They pose as riddles for the mind but really they are minefields of frustration exhaustion and flat out mind-fuckery to give you no other option that to surrender to the truth of now and true clear awareness  in other words a level of enlightenment.   Your mind can never out wit a koan. The koan is never about mental acuity or intelligence.

"I went to school to learn ,  I learned zen to forget"

Edited November 4, 2017 by Source_Mystic

[Leo Gura]

@Source_Mystic Yup

[onedude]

This post made me remember a quote by Alan Watts. It goes something along these lines: "The state of moushin is kind of a quick thinking that a good comedian has".

As I understand this, basically theres a state of mind where you can react spontaniously without thinking about what to say or what to do. And your reaction would be most geniune and appropriete in the situation, if you are intelligent/trained enough. Now, i'd like to mention that I am by no means close to mastering this state (talking about it as if theres anything to master at first place ), but just recently, Ive started to become more and more aware that it indeed exists and I can certainly relate to the thoughts you are having.

Nicely put and thanks for sharing!

[Source_Mystic]

The three most important words are is be and are. Things like self inquiry meditation any spiritual exercises are trying to break your ego and shatter you mind in one way or another Because all of us have been brainwashed from birth. We have been told the rules of existence and  "this is how things are" when in fact 90% of that is garbage,  baggage and negative conditioning that actually hurts us takes away mental peace. To come back to your essential nature it is imperative  the get rid of all that false conditioning. 

A lot of this stuff is very easy for me to talk about and even understand practicing it and integrating all of it in you life every day is the hard part that is why I think a lot of people feel like hypocrites sometimes nothing on this path is easy.  Just do you best and keep pushing though and have persistence even when it gets hard and you will get there.

[Samuel Garcia]

12 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

C) Thinking can also exhaust itself. After lots of thinking, the mind gets tired and surrenders to non-thinking.

So is this how one overcomes the addiction to thinking if traditional mediation doesn't work? After doing a 10 day vipassana retreat, my (ADHD) mind was chattering even more than before and could never settle down compared to others people who were able to access deep concentration.

[Leo Gura]

@Samuel Garcia I think you just require a lot more practice.

It takes YEARS for the monkey chatter to calm down.