21 Days Without Orgasms

[Nadia Starseed]

Have any of you guys tried the 21 day challenge?
.. The tantric one, where you're not suppose to have orgasms for 21 days, with the purpose of boosting the natural hormone production to get happier and more energetic?
- If you've tried it, I really want to hear about your experiences!

When I heard that it is possible, to achieve the same amount of happiness and creativity as you experienced as a child, I really got exited about trying it out.

Maybe some of you want to try it out at the same time and with me, for the next 21 days?

It's free..

Here's a video with more information:

 

[Anicko]

I think it's a bunch of baloney. If you believe it's going to make a difference, you'll likely experience just that (placebo). It's how our minds work. 

Instead of sexuality being a ticket to hell, it's some sort of key to unlocking your mystical powers! I feel like humans feel such a need to put their biological functions on a pedestal so we can have more meaning in our lives. We've got to be better than our friend's dog that's always humping our leg, right? 

I've never *intentionally* gone really long periods of time without orgasm, but it's happened plenty of times over my life. It makes no difference either way. 

That said, there's no harm in you experimenting. That's how we all learn and grow. But be careful with the beliefs you allow into your mind. Don't shortchange yourself later by believing you can't be creative enough if you aren't controlling some random facet of yourself (especially something as silly as how many days between orgasms). 

 

 

Edited February 23, 2016 by Anicko
Small clarification ;)

[Extreme Z7]

@Nadia Starseed 

7 hours ago, Nadia Starseed said:

Have any of you guys tried the 21 day challenge?
.. The tantric one, where you're not suppose to have orgasms for 21 days, with the purpose of boosting the natural hormone production to get happier and more energetic?
- If you've tried it, I really want to hear about your experiences!

When I heard that it is possible, to achieve the same amount of happiness and creativity as you experienced as a child, I really got exited about trying it out.

I understand you feeling excited at the possibility of feeling the joy you felt as a child before. The tricky thing to understand is that the source of the enjoyment as a child is always there. It's been buried after years of conditioning not only by sexual desires but all kinds of imaginations your mind creates. What you need is not just to experience not having the desire fulfilled. You need to remove the attachment from it. And even then, that's just step #1.

You can clean the cobwebs but you need to find and kill the spiders

@Anicko

1 hour ago, Anicko said:

I think it's a bunch of baloney. If you believe it's going to make a difference, you'll likely experience just that. It's how our minds work.

I'm confused. So are you saying it will not work or it will work? You say you think it's useless advice and then immediately follow it up with a sentence implying that it may work as long as you believe it does because that's "how our minds work"? Please notice the contradiction and clarify your message. I mean take a look at this sentence:

I think it will work great! If you believe it's going to make a difference, you'll likely experience just that. It's how our minds work.

This is more contextually coherent in my mind.

[Ayla]

11 hours ago, Nadia Starseed said:

When I heard that it is possible, to achieve the same amount of happiness and creativity as you experienced as a child, I really got excited about trying it out

If you think about it... it is an orgasm that created the person that you (and I and every living animal) are right now here on Earth.  

[Anicko]

@MaxWare1997 Just because you believe something is true does not make it so. The brain has the capability of being really convincing, but it's still a lie. 

In the science/medical community it's called the placebo or psychosomatic effect. 

I know this whole anti-masturbation, anti-sex thing is super popular (I love how trends cycle), but people aren't seeing the illusion being sold to them. 

My husband has bought into the whole no fap thing. For months now. From his perspective, he feels "amazing". He's not seeing reality. At all. In the least, it's made him behave really rather annoyingly to me. I've got other things to do besides fuck for an hour or more a day. And he doesn't take 'no  thanks' for an answer at all. Sucks for me, a lot actually.   I appreciate what he's going for, but he won't allow himself to see how he's being fooled. 

 

Edited February 23, 2016 by Anicko

[Extreme Z7]

@Anicko You are right about the mind being deceptive about what is truth in the world. However, here's something a bit freaky. Awareness of the placebo effect still does not reveal truth. Your mind still does not know itself for what it is. You might even say that illusion that the mind is consciousness is the ultimate placebo effect.

I'm not sure if you consider yourself a spiritual seeker. If not, then feel free to ignore what I just said. I just like to approach conversations of the mind through a metaphysical/consciousness perspective.

Regarding Nadia's challenge, I also don't think the 21 days without orgasm is going to help much. Getting rid of sexual desires will only help the person who is obsessed with it to a point that it holds him/her back. I'm a person with minor physical problems that prevent me from experiencing orgasms. Never had one in my life, although I don't think about it too much, I actually care very little about sexual desires. My lack of sexual experience has never held me back. Yet, I've experienced terrible difficulties in happiness and creative areas growing up. I'm only now finally working my way up and building my skills. What actually works is ambition, discipline, serenity, all other "flowery" and calm traits and a whole bunch a knowledge. Not knowledge from scientific experiments, though. I find those will not help you much. I mean knowledge about how your consciousness actually works and how to direct it. Knowledge so deep that it is impossible to accurately communicate to another person.

I'm rambling about consciousness again. Well, I'm off to maybe play some NES games on emulator.

[Franz]

I was single + no sex dates for over three months and was 100% sure to not go back to fapping or porn. 

At the end, it was pretty easy. After a while you stop to be horny all the time, to the point where having sex with yourself

would feel weird and pointless. I channeled that energy somewhere else in life.

 

Sex afterwards didnt feel much different than before, so if this feels like a challenge to you, dont overestimate the benefits. 

[Anicko]

You must be careful to not buy into the lies of your own mind just as carefully as the ones from other people. I prefer to err on the side of not believing pretty much anything. When you do this, you discover what the truth actually is because no matter an opinion the truth can not be changed. 

I have found that as I remove false beliefs from my mind, my life changes pretty amazingly. Depression and anxiety disappeared from my daily life. I'm not angry all the time. My imagination is returning. My sense of humor is back from a long vacation. 

People don't like to be told that their life sucks because of their own mind. It's a big ugly pill to swallow. But the people who do realize it, and take the journey through their own pain will find so much better on the other side of it. Not having an orgasm for 21 days might fix a problem for you if you believe it will, for a little while. Then you have to keep it up, like it's a drug. It's a trap. Get into your mind and find out why you don't feel creative or happy enough, fix the beliefs that are in your way and then you have actually fixed the problem for good. Then you can go back to your actually desired orgasming schedule.   

[Extreme Z7]

41 minutes ago, Anicko said:

My husband has bought into the whole no fap thing. For months now. From his perspective, he feels "amazing". He's not seeing reality. At all. In the least, it's made him behave really rather annoyingly to me. I've got other things to do besides fuck for an hour or more a day. And he doesn't take 'no  thanks' for an answer at all. Sucks for me, a lot actually.   I appreciate what he's going for, but he won't allow himself to see how he's being fooled. 

To an extent, everyone fools themselves to some degree regardless of whether or not they're being sold a "magic pill" or raised in the rainforest and has never seen a television before. Do not state that other people are not seeing reality until you yourself have not only seen it but become it. (Yes, I'm talking from a consciousness perspective again). When you say "reality", what you're actually saying is your perspective. So when you say your husband is not seeing reality, you're actually saying that he does not see your perspective which is just as narrow and deluded as not only his but everyone else's.

I recently wrote in my journal about my short experience where I suddenly felt separation between experience and mind. It was so radically different from what mind used to tell about reality. It's the closest I've ever felt to reality itself yet I know there is still more to discover.

3 minutes ago, Anicko said:

You must be careful to not buy into the lies of your own mind just as carefully as the ones from other people. I prefer to err on the side of not believing pretty much anything. When you do this, you discover what the truth actually is because no matter an opinion the truth can not be changed. 

I have found that as I remove false beliefs from my mind, my life changes pretty amazingly. Depression and anxiety disappeared from my daily life. I'm not angry all the time. My imagination is returning. My sense of humor is back from a long vacation. 

People don't like to be told that their life sucks because of their own mind. It's a big ugly pill to swallow. But the people who do realize it, and take the journey through their own pain will find so much better on the other side of it. Not having an orgasm for 21 days might fix a problem for you if you believe it will, for a little while. Then you have to keep it up, like it's a drug. It's a trap. Get into your mind and find out why you don't feel creative or happy enough, fix the beliefs that are in your way and then you have actually fixed the problem for good. Then you can go back to your actually desired orgasming schedule.   

You're already doing a pretty good job in managing your mind! There is still a lot more to discover about reality. Being overly skeptical about everything will not help you advance to these higher levels of truth that I'm trying to point to. Not only that, I actually recommend that you listen to everything but without judgement. Experience everything but without attachment. The next step is to discover what the mind actually is existentially. Do this and you have reached the next evolutionary step in your consciousness.

[Anicko]

Reality is simply the manifestation of the sum of your beliefs. Reality is not truth. 

I am not skeptical. I don't want to put any more lies in my mind. As contradictory ad it may seem, they do not mean the same thing. And just because I don't believe something doesn't mean I judge it. You are the one judging me- and I say that with kindness and respect, because if you are seeking what you said in your previous posts, you would appreciate having it brought to your attention that you are judging and making assumptions. If you must label me, I prefer "not gullible" to overly skeptical.   

It is a hard thing to put into words. It's hard to say it in a way that most people would understand. I only mentioned the one small piece about my husband and my situation as a personal anecdote. Ultimately, it doesn't mean anything because it's an illusion anyways. 

I am not concerned with existentialism at this point in my life. I don't care why I exist, all that actually matters is that I do. Should I discover something along those lines, fantastic. What I'm seeking is peace, joy, a life worth living. And I'd love everyone to have the same thing. So I'm that friend that's always got to tell you when you're thinking something silly or harmful. It doesn't always make me popular, but it might make me the truest friend you ever had. 

[Sarah Marie]

Nope, I still am trying to grasp why people don't want to have orgasims. 

Talk about feeding my muse.

[Anicko]

8 minutes ago, Sarah_Flagg said:

Nope, I still am trying to grasp why people don't want to have orgasims. 

Talk about feeding my muse.

Because some idiot (maybe even with the label of "expert") told them to stop for one of/or many reasons, and deep down inside everyone battles the core belief that sex is bad and they are going to hell, so they want to believe the idiot. Cue placebo effect, some people feel better, so, many people take that as evidence the idiot was right. It's a neverending cycle it seems. But even that will just be the reality (illusion) itself until everyone "wakes up". 

... I totally realize you were likely being light-hearted, but that was a great comment. 

[Sarah Marie]

@Anicko I feel the opposite of buying into that, I'm trying to figure out how to have better, stronger, and longer orgasims. 

When I think about living to my full potential, having awesome orgasims is important. The idea that sex or orgasim is bad is completely silly to me. I feel like that's saying my urge for water is bad, your body is thirsty so drink. 

[Anicko]

But it's a hard belief to avoid taking on for most people. It exists everywhere in this world, especially where religions are prominent. So I don't judge those that make the choice. I've had my own issues. But I would caution them to keep an open mind, and it's better to believe it's a lie and discover truth than it is to believe everything because your own mind will then deceive you. And I'm definitely not jumping on that bandwagon with them, ha!  

Edited February 23, 2016 by Anicko

[Avi]

I'm on day 17 of no PMO (Porn, Masturbation, Orgasm). I just have to say that abstaining from PMO was the best thing I have ever done. It really showed me what I was missing out of life. I have so much more time to do personal development work, I have way more energy, I actually go out and talk to real girls, have fun, my voice has gotten deeper, hike, eat healthy, read more, view women as actual people instead of objects, the list goes on and on. 

I was addicted for over 10 years and I'm still trying to get over it. Let me tell you though, the withdraw symptoms are extremely horrible. Flashbacks, no sexual drive, extreme sexual drive to watch P and to MO. But so far it's been really worth it and I'm only on day 17!  @Sarah_Flagg So this would be one reason why I wouldn't want to have an O. 

The whole point of no PMO (typically 90 days, but varies for everyone, specifically males) is to to reset the brain to pre-porn status. In case any of you are curious. Please let me know if you have any questions. 

[Sarah Marie]

@Avi this is so interesting. I understand addictions very well and have suffered from different kinds of addictions. Awesome for you this makes me happy for you!

[Avi]

@Sarah_Flagg Thank you :))) SARAH_FLAGG BEST MOD IMO. 

[Sarah Marie]

1 minute ago, Avi said:

@Sarah_Flagg Thank you :))) SARAH_FLAGG BEST MOD IMO. 

[DizIzMikey]

@Sarah_Flagg lmao

9 hours ago, Sarah_Flagg said:

@Anicko I feel the opposite of buying into that, I'm trying to figure out how to have better, stronger, and longer orgasims. 

When I think about living to my full potential, having awesome orgasims is important. The idea that sex or orgasim is bad is completely silly to me. I feel like that's saying my urge for water is bad, your body is thirsty so drink. 

Lmao 

[Fishy]

From what I heard from other sources earlier its only men that waste their sexual energy. Thats by ejaculation, maybe thats why you women doesn't notice any difference. I feel drained any time i ejaculate, now i gone 17 days without and it does feel good. It feels good to not feel drained and tired all the time.

Edited February 24, 2016 by Fishy