Managing Intense Bliss Depression Fluctuations

[electroBeam]

Hry guys recently I've been going through large fluctuations of bliss and depression.

One part of the day I would be in absolute bliss and egolessness the next day my mind would be extremely depressive, bringing up the meaningless of life, and other things not worth mentioning. And there would be just a state of depressive Ness like the void would inherently contain sadness in it.

 

This has repercussions for school work, normal work and social relationships.

While I don't have bipolar disorder, it would be equivalent to a void version of it.

Has anyone ever read anything about this issue and what they did to calm down the fluctuations?

[Brimstone]

Try CBD @electroBeam , it has many benefits including mood stabilisation

[Nahm]

@electroBeam I was diagnosed with manic depression around 20 years ago. Sounds similar. Tried several meds, didn’t help, side effects sucked. Daily meditation, exercise & good eating were completely effective. I think I had stuff going on from my angry dad. I learned a lot about that, and about what manic depression is and what is known about it. The understanding made the food part much easier. Try everything you can. I feel for ya. Blows.

[Leo Gura]

@electroBeam A natural part of the spiritual purification process. Keep applying mindfulness to your ups and downs. Notice their impermanence. You're clearly still clinging to moods and states. That needs to be transcended eventually.

Instead of chasing bliss, pursue reality -- that which is actual.

Stay the course. You're doing fine. The ego will create mood swings to buck you off like a cowboy at a rodeo.

[Arman]

6 hours ago, electroBeam said:

Has anyone ever read anything about this issue and what they did to calm down the fluctuations?

My experiences are similar to yours. Part of the reason the 'down' portions are as miserable as they are is because of the attachment to being high and the resistance to being low. Part of the issue is thinking that it is problematic or that something is wrong. Notice the assumption that you are supposed to be happy and successful all the time. I have heard that belief described as 'unique to modern western civilization'. It is a destructive belief because it denies the rhythms of nature and self development which leads to frustration, confusion and lowered self esteem because every time the pendulum swings the other way it's an opportunity to beat yourself up. 

What has helped me to grow and evolve through the fluctuations is constantly keeping in mind the idea of the 'rhythms of expansion and contraction' that are fundamental to this world and a part of all systems. Without sounding too esoteric: night always follows day, what heats up will cool down, flowers open and close, etc. These rhythms directly apply to the inner journey and particularly the expansion and contraction of the psyche. 

Holding this in mind helps to avoid becoming too 'zoomed in' to any one aspect of the experience. This expanded awareness in my experience seems to accelerate the process which makes the highs less frenetic, and the lows less miserable. You can then honor the difficulties as opportunities and you will have a more intuitive motivation to become less 'grabby' of the good times. 

Edited October 8, 2017 by Arman

[zazed]

I tend to experience a similar thing.

I seemed to fluctuate between no-mind meditative states, and feelings of self-doubt and of emptiness, i was questioning the value of existence.
Recently i have taken a more firm hand in my psyche, and started watching motivational video's, reading about confidence building techniques.
From this i concluded three things:

1. Ideally i would be bliss 24/7 and not need motivational confidence building techniques
2. building up the self in between moments of no-mind is preferable to the alternative (depression)
3. Watching the mind and steering it by rejecting doubt, increasing confidence and strength, takes a form of mindfulness

For me, just watching it without intervention, was spiraling me into depression in my daily life. This did not impact my meditation rly.
I am curious to learn how others view this, am i going backwards or forwards in my spiritual practice, by keeping my mind in check?

 

A small addendum: I was not bothered by my lack of motivation, or my feelings of emptiness emotionally. It was all perfectly fine for me. The issue was, it was impacting my work, my social life. I was not really living anymore, i was just mindful and passive all the time. I could find no reason to do anything anymore, other than striving for enlightenment.

Edited October 8, 2017 by zazed
A small addendum

[Hero in progress]

@electroBeam  

Study and learn about the Secret of the golden flower, its a book you should get it. Ancient book, its material was written by Masters. And the method has been around for thousands of years. That will guide you to go further.

[WelcometoReality]

@electroBeam The boring answer: Structure and routines in your day to day life. Each day eat, sleep and wake up at the same times. Daily exercise. No drugs or alcohol.

[electroBeam]

@Hero in progress you mean osho's one? 

[Hero in progress]

@electroBeam

Osho has a book called the secret of secrets. In the book he is explaining and commenting on the book I am talking about. I am talking about the actual book The secret of The golden flower. 

[electroBeam]

@Hero in progress the actual book is written in mandarin

[Hero in progress]

@electroBeam

I recommend reading both translations. The technique explained in much detail in these books will guide you in circulation of the light. It will help you. 

[pluto]

See every moment of both ups and downs as a test the universe has sent you to see if you pass or fail, if you fall for it or transcend it. Everything in the universe functions in a spiral manner. I was going through something similar few years ago and it happens from time to time you just have to keep doing what others have mentioned in the comments to keep your awareness sharp and eventually it will fade once you learned your learn and transcend your lessons.