Self Love Techniques

[LaucherJunge]

I feel like the area im making the least progress in is self love.
So i want to ask you all what are your ways to practise self love?

[Highest]

Self love for who? How do you love yourself anyhow? Why do you need it? If you know who or what you are, why tell yourself I love myself? The ego needs self-love, the actualized understands that love comes from within anyhow (very subtly). Love others and you will be fulfilled, no matter if they love you back or not. There is no need to love oneself, you are already fulfilled and complete. Grasp this and you will understand why self-love is futile, just part of the incomplete ego. I'm God, I'm this and that, I'm confident, I'm x and y and b and s. All of this is ego.

[Toby]

It's one thing to discover love as an aspect of who you are but meeting all that is unresolved is something different. "Shadow work" is more or less necessary for that. In that domain I like "The Work" by Byron Katie, "Somatic Experiencing" by Peter Levine and the Enneagram as taught for example by Eli Jaxon-Bear the best. But there are so many other approaches as well.

[LaucherJunge]

5 minutes ago, Highest said:

Self love for who? How do you love yourself anyhow? Why do you need it? If you know who or what you are, why tell yourself I love myself? The ego needs self-love, the actualized understands that love comes from within anyhow (very subtly). Love others and you will be fulfilled, no matter if they love you back or not. There is no need to love oneself, you are already fulfilled and complete. Grasp this and you will understand why self-love is futile, just part of the incomplete ego. I'm God, I'm this and that, I'm confident, I'm x and y and b and s. All of this is ego.

I thought the same thing recently but I don't see this working for me anymore. It was for a time and i decided to write to a girl from my past recently with a mindset of just loving and giving. But i still can't really deal with it, i resolved the emotional pain i had everytime she rejects me with an answer, but the main issue is that I am more attracted to her in an egoic way when she acts like this and I find myself just waiting for her 1 sentence answer and writing whole texts back and it makes her just more attractive the less she writes back. Only if i really focus on my breath or something else for a meditation im not totally caught up in thinking about her.

[Highest]

It's not just about giving and loving, it's about being fulfilled which in my standpoint self-love will not help. If you have girl problems, that's another thing. What you need is a straight path my brother, you have to help yourself. You ca love yourself as much as you want, but all that does is building up your ego. You should be fulfilled as a man, not chasing small stuff. The mind makes all these projections, can you be in a state where you are just existing, and almost everything happens by intuition, or from the heart/soul? Do some shadow work or psychedelics, should get you on a path if you are not already on one. Go the hard way, in the end it will give results. My advice.

[LaucherJunge]

6 minutes ago, Highest said:

It's not just about giving and loving, it's about being fulfilled which in my standpoint self-love will not help. If you have girl problems, that's another thing. What you need is a straight path my brother, you have to help yourself. You ca love yourself as much as you want, but all that does is building up your ego. You should be fulfilled as a man, not chasing small stuff. The mind makes all these projections, can you be in a state where you are just existing, and almost everything happens by intuition, or from the heart/soul? Do some shadow work or psychedelics, should get you on a path if you are not already on one. Go the hard way, in the end it will give results. My advice.

Yes i can be in such a state, I know that my mind is projecting but it doesn't change the outcome.
Well how exactly am i supposed to get fulfilled as a man?

[Highest]

 

5 minutes ago, LaucherJunge said:

Yes i can be in such a state, I know that my mind is projecting but it doesn't change the outcome.
Well how exactly am i supposed to get fulfilled as a man?

No more being a slave to the mind, that is enough fulfillment. 

[LaucherJunge]

13 minutes ago, Highest said:

 

No more being a slave to the mind, that is enough fulfillment. 

That is exactly what I was asking for in this thread, how to not let my mind disturb me at all even though it is going crazy. Sure i can go meditate and i can focus on my breath or anything else at any given time but if i want to interact with girls and people for that matter I will have to think from time to time, also when sleeping I can't really meditate and i feel at the next day how this situation is giving me a headache after waking up for all of the day.
A cave meditator doesn't have to care about such things, I know that but I actually want to function in society and not be the next Eckhart Tolle.

Edited October 3, 2017 by LaucherJunge

[Highest]

The mind is connected with the ego, to end it is a long process and many never do it. If you really want a quiet mind, your ego has to die. Believe me, you can function perfectly in society without an ego around you. But most either have to take psychedelics or years/decades of spiritual practice to just get a hold on the mind. Just take one thing at a time. ''if i want to interact with girls and people for that matter I will have to think from time to time''. You can do all of that, thoughts never really ends. But it is possible to interact without thinking, in other words just being. Talking happens, but the mind is quiet of thoughts. You don't need to think in order to interact with people, I know that from experience. 

[Nahm]

10 hours ago, LaucherJunge said:

I feel like the area im making the least progress in is self love.
So i want to ask you all what are your ways to practise self love?

Exercise & meditation. ?

[Sage_Elias]

Try doing some self affirmations...while at the same time doing what these good people mentioned above