Testing The Ego

[OhHiMark]

My new house mate just moved in, I wanted to make sure I chose the right person but of course, you never know until you start living with them. Right now my ego is very offended and need some advice.

The last two people to move in have been pretty odd, and don't worry, I've asked myself "maybe it's me". 

My current housemate was worried that I was using their dish cloth to wash my plates, to which I responded I was using my own. We then carried on our fun conversation of learning languages, cultures and our landlord, no issues, right? Well it turns out they've now taken their dish cloth in their room to which I can only deduce is to prevent me from possibly contaminating theirs with sauce. (It's a fresh cloth)

Both new and old housemate keep their 'valuable' kitchen products in their room in the event I may use a dish washer tablet of washing powder. I brought this up with them to ask their opinion to which the response was "Well if you pay for something you don't want the other person using it", I have my own products, it's a 2 bed flat not a 6 room hostel.

"I'm a clean freak" she told me, doesn't want to use my plates or me use hers etc.

So right now my ego feels offended, I know this feeling well, I want to right this wrong but at the same time, I want to just let it go, give the ego a good test.

Do you approach said person or do you embrace the discomfort and continue to have fun conversations like nothing happened?

It all seems so incredibly petty.

Any similar situations? 

 

 

 

Edited October 2, 2017 by OhHiMark

[Epiphany_Inspired]

I haven't had a roommate in at least 15 years, but I've had lots (lived on my own since 17)...yeah, there's a lot of petty shit....I once had a roommate/ friend almost kick me out for pulling her recycling from the trash...she refused to recycle thinking it was "dirty"...although it's an example of communication that eventually worked out...I was also a total jerk, just to get my way...I tortured her with photos of landfills etc...until she "got it" that I "needed" to recycle or I would inflict guilt on both of us about harming our world...the thing is a huge % of our recycling now goes in the landfill anyway, because the recycling process often costs more than the materials are worth...perhaps it's all a scam to make our egos feel less destructive in this toxic culture...who knows...

If it's possible to actually fully let it go, *with no lingering resentment*, you could maybe try that...otherwise maybe use a communication model?....maybe set the intention - you want to have a good relationship because you like them and want to feel comfy in the home together...maybe tell them your "feelings"- the ones underneath "offended", which is likely sad & hurt...maybe tell them your "context" - maybe you were offended because you were called dirty as a child or something....maybe if they understand your position...and you understand theirs you could work it out...or it might escalate the pettiness...I have no idea...play it by ear?