Change Behaviour Or Just Be Mindfull

[haai14]

When i see my self doing something egoic like judging, being fearful or something else should i just be mindfull and dont change my behaviour and watch my self doing it or is it better to stop doing it. Because in one of his videos he said awerness alone is curitive so is it better that way or stoping the behaviour.

[Elton]

Awareness of taking the right action and practicing mindfulness within that, awareness involves being too...  

Maybe after reaching levels of high awareness you might get aware of the true nature of reality or perception and small issues of the ego won't matter anymore... 

Be aware of what is the fear of?  Why is the need to judge coming out?

Be aware of the lies you tell your self.. Be aware of the guilt. 

 

[haai14]

if i get to the root of it for example im judging because... will that awernes and knowing the root autofix the problem? 

[Elton]

10 hours ago, haai14 said:

if i get to the root of it for example im judging because... will that awernes and knowing the root autofix the problem? 

I am not sure if it will fix your problem cause I myself am very less aware,getting higher states of awareness is not probably easy as you may have to dedicate your entire life to gain higher levels of awareness until you reach those levels it will be a safe bet to take action to overcome these feelings.... 

Vipassana meditation is a type of concentrative type of meditation where you focus on the body sensations they say that is the unconscious mind.... Where you treat everything objectively.... The root of you feeling all these emotions may be due to your childhood years which can take years to solve...

After seeing leos vedio I think that all my suffering is due to bad parenting but I don't blame them and I need to take responsibility of my own life... 

Judgement and fear is due to social conditioning.. 

[phoenix666]

the moment you become aware of the unwanted behavior the need for doing it should weaken. or at least in my experience and if it's not too deeply rooted into your subconscious. in that case it take times and times again of you engaging in the 'unwanted' behavior and just becoming aware of it, again and again. patience is the key. and don't beat yourself up. I know it's not easy, but try to literally love your 'sins' to death <3

[YaNanNallari]

Because we can't be fully aware so some action is necessary. There will almost always be some uncomfortable feelings and things you want to push through. Even if things won't work out then there are valuable lessons to be learned. Don't be much of a perfectionist regarding action when it comes to basic habits. Also remember that says in that video "if you really want to do it, then do it and watch the consequences." (Your minds thoughts may also lie about the motives, see how you feel about it deeply instead of just taking the first thought as a fact)

I'd also watch this video and do the exercise. It teaches a perspective you could apply to other things than yourself as well.

 

[Elisabeth]

@haai14  I understand your question. I'm not sure if there is an answer, more likely you have to choose the approach that works better for you for every particular problem. Like, maybe you don't have much problem refraining from junk food so you can stop yourself but you absolutelly can't give up smoking, so you just watch it. Maybe there's even ballance to be found for every particular problem: you get angry so you watch yourself being irritated and snappy at people, but you stop yourself from actually attacking someone. 

I get the feeling my answer here is not very deep, but that's how I understand it in practice right now. 

[Preetom]

The first step: Love your heart.

The middle step: Love your heart.

The Last step: Love your heart.

Every disturbing experience that grab your attention and open the pandoras box of judgement and micromanaging, you need more love not less. Love becomes the only response to life no matter what arises. Matt Kahn <3

Do this and see the magic of auto correction over time.

 

 

[Epiphany_Inspired]

@haai14 I'm not sure...I think the order could maybe switch-up as needed?...for example: sometimes there may be behaviours we could change...but we aren't even aware of them until we use mindfulness to discover them where they lurk....on the other-hand....if you are aware of a behaviour and have the desire and the ability to change it, you could just go for it....combining the two might be best in other areas, especially where the behaviours are tricksters and may try to re-immerge...I don't know...

Edited October 3, 2017 by Epiphany_Inspired

[starsofclay]

@Elisabeth This is exactly what I'm going through right now.  From the junk food, to smoking, to being irritable. You were spot on, haha. It's like you were channeling me or something .

Junk food is easy for me to give up. When I do eat it, it's not an addiction, and I can use mindfulness to stop myself.

With cigs, I am growing to hate this nasty habit, but I can't (or don't) stop myself. So I have just been observing it, and observing what it does to me and how it makes me feel, which is usually pretty yucky after a few of them.  I think in time I will have no desire to do it any more. but mindfulness doesn't help me just quit cold turkey.

Also I work in a very high stress environment and do get snippy sometimes. I usually end up embarrassed at myself and try to contemplate how I should have responded better. This is mindfulness, and am trying to train myself to be mindful when it is actually happening instead of getting embarrassed after the fact. 

[Forestluv]

@haai14 It all is. A thought is a thought. An action is an action. a feeling is a feeling.

Society and language is based on judgement. Consider how many adjectives and adverbs there are in the English language. Good/bad, beautiful/ugly, mean/nice and on and on. A day without adjectives/adverbs is a very different perspective.

Edited October 3, 2017 by Serotoninluv

[Elisabeth]

4 hours ago, starsofclay said:

@Elisabeth This is exactly what I'm going through right now.  From the junk food, to smoking, to being irritable. You were spot on, haha. It's like you were channeling me or something .

4

Haha. Actually, I chose the most common examples I could think of  As for me, luckily I don't smoke, but I have a huge problem to reduce my sugar intake. So far, observation has helped with chewy sweets, I don't buy those anymore 

[Joseph Maynor]

The advice you need depends on where you are in your personal development.  

Relevant video:

 

Edited October 3, 2017 by Joseph Maynor