My First Experience With Ayahusaca In Europe

[Samra]

Hi All,

 

I am currently living in UK, and I had my first Ayahusaca experience here in Europe! For the sake of the privacy and safely of the people involved, , I will not share too many information. All im going to say, is that it was not hard to find a super reliable source in Europe. The lady who set the ceremony, as well as the Shaman and his team were incredible! By the end of three days retreat, I was in love with everybody involved, and the Shaman and his team. He had studied in Peru under Peruvian Shamans 14 years ago, and he constantly travels between Europe and Peru. The medicine herself was great as well.

There are couple of things I am going to warn you about doing Ayahusaca if you were thinking about doing it.

1. Do not do it without a master Shaman(s). This medicine is super strong. You need someone to guide you through it. It bends space and time, and it literary takes your spirit out of your body ( at least thats how i felt and I saw). It is a very intense experience. Never do it with amateurs or at home. Do not take this point lightly. There are many cheap places in Europe who just provide the medicine for cheap and an amateur person who just do it for you. Do not do it. Don't be cheap. Find a reliable source and a proper master Shaman. Very important. 

2. You do not need prior experience with other psychedelics. I did not have any. However, you need to be super open minded. Dont go just cause. Only go when you have the calling. You know it when you do.

3. One or two session will not change you. For better or for worse. So don't fear it. Also don't get disappointed if its not a miracle cure. 

4. Never push anyone to do it with you. You must have a calling. I had a calling , and i needed to go. But my partner and friends were not ready at the time, so I went by myself. In fact, I recommend doing in alone. Especially without a partner. I think that is the best and least distracting way.

5. Ayahusaca is not a psychedelic trip. It might happen, but thats not what you are there for. You may not have any visions. It is a healing medicine. It is a teacher. It will may not be a fun experience. In fact, it is quite a difficult inner journey. Simply because it shows you your most inner secrets and lies you believe, that you do not want to face. But is it worth it? Absolutely. Some of the most brilliant and significant teachings i ever had. 

6. You need to let go. I could not let go all the way. I could not face my demon in its totality. So my experience was not full. But now i know what i need to do for my next healing session. I know what to meditate for. So maybe don't go to Peru for your first time. Try somewhere more local. Once you become more familiar and the master of your fears, then go for Peru. That is my plan at least. Practise makes perfect.

7. Follow the necessary diet for at least 3 days before the ceremony.

Anyways, There is so much more I can say about the experience itself, but I want you to see it for yourself. Do your research, but dont listen to other people's experiences too much. I did not. I just went for it. So i had no particular expectations.

 

Let me know if you have any questions,

Ta!

Samra

 

 

 

[Nahm]

@Samra Peru has been on my compass for years. I appreciate your taking the time to share this. ❤️

[Samra]

My pleasure @Nahm  Definitely go for it. If Peru is too expensive for you, try and find a good local Shaman. 

[Samra]

Its been a year, but im finally going for my second Ayahusaca retreat. This time with a friend from Canada, and it will be in Portugal. I actually wanted to go for a 5 Meo DMT ceremony with a Shaman in Germany, but after talking to my friend, we decided to go for another Ayahuasaca ceremony before 5 Meo, just to be more prepared. I know nothing really prepares you for 5 Meo, but i still felt this is the way for me. I am hoping to be able to go way deeper this time. I am on a lot more strict diet, I have done a lot more research, I am more proficient with Yoga and meditation. I have read more books, watched more videos. Hopefully, I can have a breakthrough. If not , it will still be a lovely inner journey, shared with ma gal. I'll update this post in four weeks time. I am going on an internet fasting for the next two weeks to cleanse the mind, as well as the body.  

Edited June 2, 2018 by Samra

[Leo Gura]

@Samra Nice!

[Samra]

@Leo Gura Thank you! :> Happy to see you back. Can't wait for your upcoming videos and blogs. I hope you experienced what you wanted in your retreat last month. 

[herghly]

@Samraif you don't mind sharing how we're your experiences ? 

 

Im still surprised Leo hasn't tried ayahussca ?

I"ve tried many different psychedelics and nothing makes my body feel better than ayahussca 

[dude]

http://www.dosenation.com/listing.php?smlid=8856

For research purposes... But be warned it may shock you lol

[Samra]

@herghly Last time was alright. I had a hard time keeping the tea in my stomach. My friend who was with me was vegan , and he got a lot more out of it. This time I am physically and mentally more prepared. I let u know in two weeks time!

[Samra]

Ayahusaca Trip report : June 2018

I arrived in Lisbon, Portugal on a Wednesday and met up with my friend who has flown from Canada. We had lots of fun exploring the beautiful city of Lisbon and catching up. Next day, we rented a car and drove three hours to our retreat. We met with all the other super interesting people who were there for the ceremony. There was a total of 12 of us. I had an interview with one of our Shamans. She asked about myself and my intentions, as well as any previous experiences with any drugs or psychedelics and all the other important details. 

Around 9 pm, we all gathered around in a beautiful glass room called Spaceship for obvious reasons. We had our Purge ceremony. Basically, you drink a horrible Tobacco medicine, and after some time, you drink gallons of water, until you throw up. It is not pleasant, but after you are super clear and you have this amazing sensation. Bunch of us gathered in the backyard, and talked about ourselves and intentions and experiences. I made couple of lovely connections which i will never forget. 

Next day, we had a very healthy breakfast. No salt, no suger,.... We had an even simpler lunch at 1 pm. Around 3 pm, me, my friend and bunch of other people went to a beautiful beach near by, high above the cliffs. The beauty was mesmerising. I sat on top of the cliffs, and meditated and contemplated for a while. 

Once we got back to the retreat, I found another glass meditation room and just stayed there by myself, trying not to get tangled up with conversations with other people. Most people were doing the same thing. We were all preparing for our journey.

Around 9 pm, everyone gathered in the Spaceship. The Shamans told us were to sit. The had paired people up for based on some sort of logic.

The Shamans who are a couple, had a very interesting of singing their Icarus songs. They each sing a different song with a different beat. At first it was very confusing, but soon it made my brain do a funny thing. It would split my consciousness and brain activity in two. I got to love it by the end.

After an hour of taking the medicine , I still couldn't really feel anything. People were already throwing up, so I though something must be wrong with me. I was getting frustrated and thought maybe i am not worthy. It was then when the Shamans called for anyone who wants a second cup. Almost everyone got up. I managed to go as well. This was quite surprising to me, since i had a very hard time last year. It seemed that my body and mind have become much more tolerant and stronger. 

Within minutes of having the second cup, the plant started talking to me. I started shaking and feeling pain all over my body. I felt an alien going through my veins. It was a horrible pain. I realised this must be how a heroin addict must feel like. And I learned compassion.  The plant told me if i can't take it, I am allowed to through up. I told he/she I am ready, so Bring it on.

Right away, a light burst out of my chest, and I saw a portal opening, and the alien entered my being. It took control. I started seeing a lot of visuals. Beauty, destruction, death, life, horror, pain, fear, love. Everything was visual and sensual. I was in bliss and pain at the same time. 

I asked her what is my purpose in life? He/she said why don't you become a Shaman? And i said no way. Im not strong enough. And she said fine, then i'll give you an easier purpose. Just draw me. Just paint me. Show people my beauty, and that will alone will bring light. And he/she showed me all her incredible beauty ( which i m already starting to forget) . She also told me that she is not only light, but the opposite as well. And all this dark forces appeared. So powerful and masculine. I was terrified. But she said accept. So i did. There is beauty in horror. He/She has no preference, and so I should learn not to have a preference either.

And then I here the Shaman calling my name. I walked in front of him, and my friend was called by the female Shaman. Then they Sang a song specific to each of us at the same time. I was blown away. Sharing this experience with my friend is priceless.    

 

To be continued ...     

 

 

 

[Sparkist]

I loved reading your reports! Thank you for sharing. Will look out for more to come.

[Charlotte]

@Samra fuck man! That's incredible. Good on you! Looking forward to part 2 of your second retreat

 

Thanks so much for sharing ♥️

[Samra]

@Charlotte @Sparkist thank you lovelies <3 

[Gladius]

That sounds like a really profound experience! But do you feel "cleaner" or "healt" somehow, or is it just a trip? I just posted mine by the way (you asked me to do so in another discussion).

[Samra]

@Gladius  My intention was to have an ego death. But the plant does as it likes, and you just go with it  And it showed me my life purpose, i was not expecting that. I guess i wasn't ready for an ego death  I read your trip report. Sounds fascinating! 

[Samra]

...

After the Shamans sang our songs, I went back to my mattress. I could feel vibrations and the effects of the songs within me. They were working their magic. I started seeing and becoming one with the plant. The plant showed me that my mother is not a human. No ones mother is a human. There is no human. And everything starting going back in time. And everything became one simple plant. He/She said, I am your mother. You are me. Then everything started to go even further into nothingness. And all sensory systems disappeared.  I started seeing the original fabric of existence. It was made of two linear lines. Floating and dancing, changing colours, playing with each other. 

Sometime after that the ceremony ended. I through up right before the last song at the request of the alien within, and it made me feel better. As i walked out of the spaceship, I was blown away by the stars in the night sky. For the fist time in my life, I could see the Milky way. My friend joined me soon after. We picked up bunch of blanket, went on the big porch balcony in pitch black, and slept under the stars for some time.

Day 2: 

In the morning, we all gathered in the same room, cleaning up after our own mess, and cleaning our buckets. We all shared details of our journey to each other and to the Shamans. To my surprise, most people didn't have any visuals. Most people had physical and emotional insights. Some just had a hard night, throwing up violently. That somehow fed my ego. I was proud of myself for seeing so many beautiful things, whilst others didn't. I though to myself ( that's because I am an artist and I have a super creative mind). This ego backlash came to hunt me at night.  

On this day, I made couple of mistakes in retrospect. I slept in the afternoon, from 1 pm to 5:30 pm. Although the Shamans suggested that, it made me super drowsy. Also I think i ate more than I needed. So by 9 pm, i was still not hungry. I started running around the retreat, trying to burn some energy and feel more alive. Nothing really worked. I went in the ceremony not in a great mood. 

Like the first night, Ceremony started and everybody had a cup of the medicine. I soon started to feel the effect. However, no visuals. I wanted to see. I needed to see the visuals again i thought to myself. My ego took over, I was in so much control. I was so frustrated at myself. After sometime, the Shamans offered a second drink, no one went for it. So even though i wasn't really feeling high, i didn't go either. An hour later, two guys went for a second cup. It was then that the plant ( or the ego) asked me to for the second cup. I was in doubt, but i heard the voices in me, "i thought you are ready for this. I though you wanted an ego death. I though you wanted to know me. Why are you being a pussy now." So i went in front of the Shaman for the second cup. The Shaman looked me with doubt. But he offered me a little bit. I literally had a sip, half the amount the Shaman offered me. 

As soon as i got back to my seat, I started seeing visuals again. "Now we are talking!" I though to myself. But the visuals were in pure. They were forced. They were mine, not a gift from the plant. I accepted that and enjoyed my trip anyways. 

Sometime after that, the ceremony ended, and my trip didn't.  I tried throwing up, nothing cam out. I was so dizzy. Everybody left the room. I went to my room to my friend. She had an amazing night. She had cried and felt so much love. And she had seen so many beautiful visuals. I hadn't experienced any of that. Jealousy took over. We went to bed, and my real trip started.

I had heard about bad trips before, but i have never really experienced it. I now know what hell is like. I was in so much agony. Physically, emotionally , spiritually. I could see darkness taking over me. My breath became toxic. My blood pressure dropped. I was dying, but not in a nice way. I was fading away and joining the dark forces. Light was gone. And thats when i started getting a lot of insights.

I told myself: You have brought this on yourself by being a control freak, you accept the responsibility. Face it all. Face this moment. And i faced all the sadness, hate, suffering. I faced my ugliest form: I am impure. I am weak. I am alone. My parents are dying. War is coming. No one likes me. I have no friends. I have no talent. I am such a mediocre artist. I am a failure. I dont deserve love. I dont know love. I dont deserve a good life. This is all fake. I am so fake. I am such a pity. Nothing matters. No one will save me.... I faced all of myself. I was dying. From inside myself, I called up thousands of Roman soldiers to come to my protection. All these gladiators surrendered me. But a powerful female entity appeared, and melted all the soldiers away. She said there is no escaping this. Face it. So i faced it all. It never got easier. This went on for an eternity. I though i am lost in this madness forever. To be honest, even now, i am still not sure if I totally got out. 

Sometime past. I was able to get out of the bed. I needed to get the alien out of body. My friend woke up as well. We went to kitchen, and i had gallons of water. Finally something came out. Still feeling dizzy and weak, we went to our room. My friend came to my rescue. She so full of love, lied beside me, gently cresting my hair, telling me it will be alright. I let her go to sleep, and i went back to my own darkness. Around 8 am, I fell sleep. I think i slept for an hour total that night. 

Around 9 I woke up. Feeling dizzy and weak. But I was reborn. I survived the night of the dark soul. I congratulated myself. Went out of the room.

At 10 , we had breakfast and shared our night experience. Most people had a fantastic night. So many insights, so much love. So many beautiful visuals. My night stood out like a swore thumb. I cried and was shaking the whole time describing my experience. Both Shamans looked at me with their wise eyes and smiled. I was so humbled. I am just an old child.

Thank you. 

 

  

 

 

 

Edited June 30, 2018 by Samra

[Vladimir]

@Samra Wow thank you so much for sharing this....especially the difficult part. I just got back from an intense 11 day shamanic retreat where I did 5 aya ceremonies, 3 san pedro and 4 kambo....I'm still trying to put everything together and will post a trip report when it's ready. I just wanted to congratulate you for being so brave, for facing your deepest fears and sharing about your experience. I thought I would be able to let go completely during this retreat but it didn't happen, so I'm still left wondering just wtf death/enlightenment really is, though every time I get close to it the theme is always the same - I'm God, I'm the only one in this Universe, there is no one to awaken but me, I have to face my deepest fears and have been shown them in all kinds of creative ways, I'm the creator of everything and at one point I fell down to the floor out of desperation and inability to control it anymore and said "forgive me for everything".....though it came out in Russian (простите меня за все....) there was no doubt at that moment that I'm responsible for all creation. There was a lot of beautiful visuals too and another theme that keeps showing up is the - serpent, puma and condor which I keep seeing every time I drink aya, mushrooms and now san pedro....which seems to be the source of my power, it's unlike any power that exists in this 'human realm' and I feel like it's my true essence. Anyway I'll post the whole thing later, I just wanted to connect with someone who can relate to the difficult part of this awakening and healing experience.

[Samra]

@Vladimir wow! Thank you for sharing!! You have done so much! So many amazing experiences, visions and insights! I have not done San Pedro and kamboo yet. I am doing a shamanic diet next year for 10 days. It will be 7 days solo in a cabin, one meal a day and three ayahuasca sessions. You cannot leave the cabin surroundings. You have access to nothing except some papers and pencils. The shaman will come to you once a day for a simple meal. And you have to take a certain plant medication daily, which will affect your dreams. The medicine will be given to you based on your experience of  the first night with mother ayahuasca. Different plants work with different chakras. My shaman told me I am ready to go further. He said ayahuasca is a general medicine. It's the other plants that do the work. So I'm going for it next year.

Once you wrote your report, please tag me somewhere so I can find it and read it!

[Forestluv]

On 9/17/2017 at 1:09 PM, Nahm said:

@Samra Peru has been on my compass for years. I appreciate your taking the time to share this. ❤️

I did an aya retreat in Peru that was amazing. Be careful tho - there isn’t any regulation and there are some shady outfits.

[Charlotte]

Thanks for sharing @Samra always love reading your reports, I'd love to know how you got on following the few weeks after your 'bad' trip ?