Trust Issues Hurting Me Regularly

[CuteCornDog]

I can't trust the people that mean the most to me in this world because I think they're all disloyal.

Potential to be cool friends, but too caught trying to look cool to everyone else.

It hurts wanting to spend time with people, and admitting it too.

I've felt this way for years.

People I REALLY enjoy bonding with.

I have to say something about it today.

I REALLY wish I could just not want to spend time with them, and let them go.

I'm also always used to having a bunch of people around me being behaving really unacceptable towards me.

Judging me and being judgmental.

That's the way I get treated.

I want to want nothing to do with the disloyal people, and to continue to proof the other people wrong the way I do.

 

The person I bonded with the most disowned me, and is afraid of me today.

Can't tell me how he really feels, and just wants to be famous.

[Spiral]

Perhaps somewhat unrelated but I also consider myself judgemental. For me it's just means observant. I mean if it a mistake then fine everyone makes mistakes but, if they are for instance disrespectful then I'll avoid them. 

I don't really see the problem with being judgemental if I keep it to myself.

As for wanting to look cool, why? What does that give you? people generally don't care about what you own or what you have done in the past. They only care about how you are now, hiding you achievements is better. If nothing else it will make you seem cooler. As for changing I'll recommend preparing and doing so when the people you hang out with change. New job, college etc.

Said this sooo many times before now but, female friends helps in so many ways especially if you have trouble opening up.

 

 

[smd]

@CuteCornDog Why not just limit the time you spend with these disloyal people and make a little time for yourself to find some new ones?

I once played a little game with one of my "frenemies" once...hahah.  The guy would only want to hang out with me when he wanted something.  Over the long years, I had caught onto it & I was tired of it.  So what I did, was I didn't pick up the phone, wouldn't respond to calls.

Next thing you know, he's calling & texting a billion times to get in contact with me...lol.  What I learned from that experience is that I could create more value by being absent & thought about in my absence, as opposed to always just hanging around & being treated like some gopher or flunkie.

They can get the gift of missing me & at the same time obtain their respect & I don't even have to be there & can put my mind to more important tasks.

[merimo28]

well, people generally are not loyal, so I don't see that you have a problem...

[Nahm]

@CuteCornDog apply honesty. It is you who is judging and trying to be right, so you are experiencing judgement and condemnation.