Why Can't We Speak Or Ask Questions Freely?

[Siv]

Hello, 

In social media, we chat with others friendly and freely. For instance, in this forum, we start questions and post our replies. In this way, we learn many things about PD. But why don't we do the same at our workplace or other social events.  What stops us not to speak out freely?  Is it too personal stuff or some fear to ask or something else? 

A small note, I didn't mean to speak out stuff that hurts or offense to others. 

[Christian]

Firstly, most people simply do not know that personal development exists. So how can they discuss a topic they've never heard about? 

Secondly, personal development  is a personal and private topic for many people including myself. I don't personally enjoy discussing PD topics with people in real life as I feel that it is a waste of time and energy. I would rather keep things light and friendly. 

Talk is cheap anyways. I just take action and let my actions speak for themselves. They are the true indicator of personal growth, not how well you can talk. 

 

[Joseph Maynor]

We are afraid of being judged stupid or crazy by our peers.  We are afraid that we might find out we are wrong and have to give up some of our cherished beliefs.  We are trained not to discuss beliefs and it is culturally considered to be rude.  We protect and respect each others' bad habit of denial.

[ajasatya]

4 hours ago, Siv said:

But why don't we do the same at our workplace or other social events.

because nobody gives a shit about growth. it is too painful.

we become serious about doing the work and enjoying it by "accident".

Edited August 17, 2017 by ajasatya

[Marinus]

@Siv

This forum is a collection of likeminded people from around the world and we can access this forum from our comfortable home. It is our intention to learn and help each other grow on this forum.

Our purpose at work is mainly making a living, you don’t have much time to dive into deep topics, because you are there to work (obviously it also depends on the kind of work you do). The employers probably don’t know anything about personal development, otherwise they might integrate it into their company some way. At school people are there to study and are already in an environment where they (hopefully) grow.

Personal development isn’t a mainstream topic, so you won’t encounter many practitioners. There are people who aren’t interested in it, but there are also people that are, they just didn’t bump into it yet.

At my previous work I talked a lot with people about it, I could because I worked at an assembly line (which was boring).  So out of boredom I wanted to work on my social skills and eventually I discussed the topic personal development. To my surprise many people showed interest and some of them even showed signs of growth themselves.

Sometimes people just need to hear about it, that power lays within your hands.

I hope this helps you.

[Spiral]

@Siv You can and it's a great why to open up, but you require great charisma to pull it of in a good way.  If you can't speak freely you lack confidence or care to much about other people view of you. Although it is common in my experience that people will assume that whatever problem you bring up is something they glorify, so things gets awkward. 

[Damir Elezi]

I think what stops us is simply social conditioning. Almost Nobody really shows his true face in public because some aspects of the mind, which are very real and in fact crucial to life, are forces that are frowned upon by society. Sexuality as a simple example is the thing that keeps the human species alive. The whole body works with sexual energies, it's essential to human life, yet it is considered rude to talk about it. 

Society just seems to be scared of things which are a bit aggressive and self-expressive. So it's normal that people won't tell each other their true nature. However, as self-actualizing people, we should, by definition of the word, try to be as authentic to ourselves and others as possible.