My Ocd Feels Like It's Destroying My Life

[kieranperez]

I really don't know how to get around nor conquer my OCD and I quite literally feel like I'm going insane. The centerpoint of all my obsessive thoughts that I'm attached to just keep me so fucking sucked in I feel like I lose touch with reality and I just can't function. I'm trying so fucking hard to do something about this but I just feel so overpowered by all of this. I really need help. I'm not getting anything done. 

Yes I know there's the techniques for awareness alone is curative and all this stuff but I've applying all these things and I just feel like it's fair to say that clinical mental illnesses are a bit trickier than that. 

I really don't know what to do. I just want to live my life and stop feel chained down by these thoughts, emtoions, anxieties, etc. that I have these chanined down obsessions to.

[ajasatya]

@kieranperez search for people who overcame ocd. i can't help you with this but one thing i know for sure: it won't be easy.

[Erlend K]

Do you go to therapy? Theres a form of CBT called Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) that is very effective against OCD. If you can't find a therapist who practice ERP you can read up on it and try to do it on your own.

Have you tested any medicines? Anafranil is very powerful in treating OCD symptoms.

[Ry4n]

FORMER SUFFERER OF OCD WHOS RECOVERED. 
Check out Mark Freeman on youtube. He does some great videos about various things relating to mental health but talks a lot about ocd and effective treatments for it.

Mark Freeman's definition of a compulsion (the cause of ocd)-Anything you do to cope with, check on, or control uncertainty, anxiety, and any other feelings you don't like.

The two main forms of therapy which I used and found effective was a combination of Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). Both are extremely useful for cutting out the compulsions that cause such suffering. Medication (SSRIs are probably your best bet as they have less side effects than other meds) can be useful too when doing the therapy. Studies have shown its effectiveness in combination with ERP, so I'd highly recommend it when doing ERP. While I say this, you should know that medication is no long-term solution to the problem, merely something to give you the strength to cut out compulsions and build the skills.

Tips on ERP: THE PAIN IS NOT THE PROBLEM. Remember that the urges, sensation, thoughts and feelings themselves while painful are not the problem, but the compulsions that you do, either in your head or out in the world, are the problem. They are what lead to your suffering, and could cause other problems such as depression and addiction.

ACCEPT ALL UNCERTAINTY- Whatever uncertainty it is. It could be as simple as "I wonder why my phone buzzed" or "I wonder what she thinks of me" to as extreme as "Did I just kill someone", "has the house burnt down" ,"what if I'm a pedophile, or a murderer, or secretly have schizophrenia", "what if none of this is real". So much in life is uncertain. When we react to the uncertainties in our head, we cause more uncertainties that are more extreme than the previous ones. Accept it all! You cannot know! You Will never know!

Try to look at the cores of your fears and the extreme consequences of your fears, and over time learn to accept those things. The cores of all fears include: Death, loss of resources and being alone. Try to find which fear is most related to your obsession, and learn to accept that as well as the obsession.

Realise that you are not your thoughts, and that your thoughts are just stories, not facts. This tip is more related to ACT. I'd recommend "The Happiness Trap" by Russ Harris to learn more. Cognitive Defusion is the key concept I am referencing here. The great thing about ACT is that it is something you can do for the rest of your life and continue to benefit from it, and it will be able to help you in various situations as well as recovery from OCD.

Remember that through this process of recovery, to be kind to yourself. Be gentle with yourself. This journey is hard, but trust me it is well worth it. RECOVERY IS POSSIBLE. I am a living example of that. I am free of the need to engage in compulsions because of these techniques. I don't take my thoughts seriously anymore, and no matter how negative my thoughts are, I can accept them and live a life I value, and if you do the things I mentioned, you will recover. Just be patient, this wont happen over night. Good luck, work hard, recover, self actualise.