Need Help Understanding These Experiences

[zunnyman]

I've done over 100 hours of SDS (strong determination sitting) and have had all sorts of experiences during SDS and experiences outside of SDS as a result of SDS. A few times I had weird wtf moments happen while I was sitting on the toilet and 2x while I was more than half asleep all as a result of SDS. I'm just really trying to understand what is going on here. I've seen all the enlightenment videos and don't think I have had an enlightenment experience, so then what can all this be? Are there any common effects people are known to have during SDS or does it vary depending on the person? 

Anyone know where I can get more information on SDS, perhaps a book? Ive seen both Leo's and shinzen young's videos already. 

The reason I am partly concerned is because sometimes these experiences get really intense and I don't know if that is a good or bad thing. 

When I close my eyes these days, in just seconds I can feel all sorts of bubbling sensations everywhere in my body, often in my head. I may be creating this myself but my visual perception begins to change in ways I never saw before. I am also trying to understand why I enter into meditative states, where it feels like a meditative wave comes over me slowly. Also sometimes I am deeply peaceful, then all of a sudden I get this intense experience I don't know how to describe. And sometimes I go from really deep meditative states, to really fast heartbeat. There are some other experiences I don't know how to describe but the only words I have are mystical or spiritual. I am not sure if thats true, maybe my mind is interpreting it like that. 

[Leo Gura]

Yeah, of course that will happen. Did you see my video: The Dark Side Of Meditation? It's all about this topic.

VERY weird stuff can and will happen when you meditate a lot and deeply.

You shouldn't be worried, but excited! This means you're meditating properly.

Expect a lot energetic shifts, expect to see colors and lights, expect full-on hallucinations.

The fast-heartbeat I can easily explain: you're at the brink of ego-death, and the body is reacting to it with primal fear. You will have to surrender to it at some point to get your enlightenment.

And if you feel like you're going insane, you're definitely headed in the right direction. Don't be surprised if you fall through the floor of your house one day

The only thing you really need to do is mindfully observe all these phenomena with curiosity. Maintain your desire to see the TRUTH. And practice self-love and surrender.

All of that stuff is the Devil leaving your body, and sometimes he don't go quietly

[zunnyman]

Wow I had no idea any of that was possible doing SDS, I'll definitely check out that video!

And for the fast heart beat thing, how exactly do I practice surrender? Is that the same thing as acceptance?

 

[zunnyman]

Woah I thought I was going crazy because 2x I experienced a really bright white light literally out of nowhere when I was more than half asleep, and my mind unconsciously (because I was more than half asleep) was telling myself to accept it fully 

[Guest username]

@zunnyman As far as I can tell surrender is exactly the same as acceptance. I was confused for a long time what people meant by "letting go" or "surrender" until I read "Letting Go: A Pathway to Surrender" by David R. Hawkins.  The word "accept" resonates much more strongly with me, and it seems you.  Letting go and surrendering always struck me as much more active/manipulative things than they are. 

[Leo Gura]

@zunnyman Surrender is a very easy thing to understand. Just imagine that someone pulls a loaded gun to your head and is about the pull the trigger. And you just feel okay about. You say, "So be it." Without any resistance, without fighting to have your way. You just surrender your self.

You're gonna have to do it as one point in your life no matter what. So might as well bite that bullet and do it now. Die before you die.