Life Purpose Course: Dilemma While Making The Plan

[Wouter]

Hi All,

While taking the life-purpose course, I am struggling with a dilemma.  I am pretty clear about my values: Truth and all the ones I consider associated: nature, integrity, purity, simplicity. I love thinking, but I consider myself pretty mature in looking for other ways of getting  understanding: for example I remember intuiting that I could learn about metaphysics by deeply investigating what actually happens when I see something, or that I don't know what I am, before I learned about spirituality.  I am currently semi-on track with spirituality: I do about 40 minutes of formal meditation a day, and I read the books of Leos list to increase my motivation / learn new techniques, traps etc. I also read about psychology, sociology, philosophy because I love it. I took the "Strengths Finder survey" and this where my top 5 strenghts:

-ideation

- analytical

-intellection

-strategising

-input

The current version of my impact statement is: "helping people live a curious life, and get  closer to the t/Truth"

Currently I think the best way to do this is by starting a blog with content about:

- how to think for yourself, find interesting pieces of information,  connect dots , remove biases,.. ( as in "How to think like Da Vinci"-Gelb or 

"Intuition Pumps And Other Tools for Thinking"-Dennett)

- live according to what you think (for example not blaming people if you don't believe in free will)

-content that opens up the minds about how interesting the world is and makes them epistemologically humble: anthropology, existentialism, quantum mechanics,...

- when I have made enough progress myself: spirituality, the whale

- sharing interesting resources like "the school of Life" (a youtube channel), actualized.org, workshops and awesome books.

- cool stuff like sensory deprivation tanks, neurofeedback training and so forth

I would love to research, contemplate and share my ideas about all these topics, and I think I would be pretty good at it. The biggest challenge seems to articulate them in English (a foreign language for me) and a fun-to-read, convincing way. Once my blog has enough followers I see plenty of opportunities to earn a living from it: organising workshops, selling courses, make the book-list paying, make the book list with affiliate links, donations.

My dillemma is the following:

I currently have a bachelors degree in Physics and initially I had the plan to do a Phd in theoretical physics. I am just so curious to a very deep description of physical reality: String theory, holography, physics of black holes, quantum field theory. Theoretical physics is a very competitive field. So when I am pursuing this I will have way less energy for meditation/ self enquiry etc. During last year I noticed that while I study I don't really enjoy it: not only during the subjects I find less interesting like "Solid state Physics" (interesting for technology but not really "deep") but also during "Relativity". Sometimes while studying I was in awe, but a big part of the time I was also cramming. I think this is because I consider myself a competitor (for good grades, academic opportunities: phd position) in physics. After the phd, I will also be 6  years (2  masters degree and 4 phd) older, so a less maluable enlightenment-seeking mind.  I think doing a phd (on a very narrow subject) is also in contrast with my input-reflex to always find other information to get a bigger picture. On the other hand: I probably would have a lot of experience with wath I want to make my blog about and a deep dive in theoretical physics also touches something deep inside me.

This brings me to the idea of immediately starting my blog and work a few years as a high-school teacher (part-time) to support myself (20yo, no near child-wishes), work on my blog and enlightenment, until my blog-tribe is big enough to become a professional blogger.

 

Can I have some advice on considerations I forgot from you guys?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Visitor]

@Wouter I think you are juggling too many things. You want too many things at once, as if you were afraid that 'time' will run away from you. Too heady for your own serenity. Settle down and let things unfold naturally. One step at a time. One blog entry at a time. One subject at a time.

Don't be so keen on promoting yourself as a person who knows. . .

On 8/5/2017 at 7:36 AM, Wouter said:

- how to think for yourself, find interesting pieces of information,  connect dots , remove biases,.. ( as in "How to think like Da Vinci"-Gelb ...

Learn how to deal with dilemmas. Sort your ego out so you won't be so enslaved to all its wants, impatience, validations etc. It is running you instead of you running it.

Stop the head games and sit with your heart. Listen to that deeper warm loving part of yourself, and find out what it is saying to you. It won't be a story, you will find it to be just a few simple words to steer you right.

[Joseph Maynor]

@Wouter You need some concrete action-plans.  Start to take some baby-actions on a daily routine.  Sounds like you are like me a little bit weighted on the thinking side of things.  That can be a trap.

Consistent daily actions directed at your purpose is key.  I would lay the theory down for a while and focus on baby-stepping in some daily-routines that will let you explore around with these matters.  Be an explorer.  You don't need to nail-down the plan before you take action.  In fact, that strategy might slow you down and cause limiting-beliefs to sprout and fester.

Push past theory with practice for a while.  Let theory catch up later.  It will.

Watch Leo's video on "Balancing theory and practice."

Edited August 13, 2017 by Joseph Maynor

[Fredrik Andersson]

On 6 augusti 2017 at 11:56 AM, Visitor said:

Learn how to deal with dilemmas. Sort your ego out so you won't be so enslaved to all its wants, impatience, validations etc. It is running you instead of you running it.

Stop the head games and sit with your heart. Listen to that deeper warm loving part of yourself, and find out what it is saying to you. It won't be a story, you will find it to be just a few simple words to steer you right.

@Visitor  Thank you for this advice, It was hurtfully spot on to my situation. Have you had difficulties with being controlled by the feeling of "to little time"? And if so, what did you think really helped you get out from that? What would your number one, concrete advice for "sorting out my ego, impatience and validation" be? 

Edited August 13, 2017 by Fredrik Andersson

[Fredrik Andersson]

15 hours ago, Joseph Maynor said:

Consistent daily actions directed at your purpose is key.  I would lay the theory down for a while and focus on baby-stepping in some daily-routines that will let you explore around with these matters.  Be an explorer.  You don't need to nail-down the plan before you take action.  In fact, that strategy might slow you down and cause limiting-beliefs to sprout and fester.

@Joseph Maynor This is helpful! "baby-stepping" is something I really need to get a grip on. I have a tendency to spin out of my own axel. 

Can you pls give me some advice on how I best prioritize my "baby-stepping"? How do I know where to start? I mean, "always do whats emotionally most difficult" is one thing that I keep in mind, but that changes from day to day, so there is no consistency in that type of strategy..

[Joseph Maynor]

2 hours ago, Fredrik Andersson said:

@Joseph Maynor This is helpful! "baby-stepping" is something I really need to get a grip on. I have a tendency to spin out of my own axel. 

Can you pls give me some advice on how I best prioritize my "baby-stepping"? How do I know where to start? I mean, "always do whats emotionally most difficult" is one thing that I keep in mind, but that changes from day to day, so there is no consistency in that type of strategy..

Here's a good way to describe it.  Say you want to find a girlfriend.  Step-one is to write-down that goal and actually read it every day.  Step-two is the implementation of that goal.  You need a strategy for obtaining your goal.  The best strategy is to break your implementation down into a daily or weekly-routine.  In this case, let's do a weekly-routine.  You are going to get a girlfriend by implementing a weekly-routine on Friday nights.  Say you target a specific club to hunt for your potential girlfriend.  If you have resistance or fear here, you're not just gonna walk in that club every Friday and talk to women.  So, you baby-step yourself.  Maybe the first Friday all you do is sit in the parking-lot of the club for 30 mins and then drive away.  Maybe the second Friday, you get out of your car and just walk around outside the club for 30 mins and then leave.  Maybe the third Friday you go inside the club for 30 minutes and then leave. See?  You are baby-stepping your actions on a routine that will eventually lead you to getting a girlfriend -- over time.  You are slowly building-up momentum and confidence to get you to your goal of obtaining a girlfriend.  This strategy is called baby-stepping.  It's a hugely effective strategy that you all should be using!  One major reason why people fail (or worse, don't even try) is that they don't know how to strategically baby-step the implementation of their goals.  A mountain is moved by a thousand baby-steps.  Think of your goals this way instead of trying to move the mountain in one or two goes.  Ain't gonna work like that.  Not for big-goals which are often scary and intimidating.  That's why achievement of big-goals is a rare and valuable thing.  Most people don't do it, and more importantly, they don't know how to do it. They lack strategic-thinking.  You wanna be like a general on the battlefield of your life, with one eye on your final-goal and at the same time with the other eye on the little tactical, strategic maneuvers that will add-up to your final victory over time.  The trap that most people fall into is they want the girlfriend right now -- they want the quick-fix.  That's a huge trap. That mentality often, but not always, leads to disaster.

Edited August 14, 2017 by Joseph Maynor

[Fredrik Andersson]

1 hour ago, Joseph Maynor said:

Here's a good way to describe it.  Say you want to find a girlfriend.  Step-one is to write-down that goal and actually read it every day.  Step two is the implementation of that goal.  You need a strategy for obtaining your goal.  The best strategy is to break your implementation down into a daily or weekly-routine.  In this case, let's do a weekly-routine.  You are going to get a girlfriend by implementing a weekly-routine on Friday nights.  Say you target a specific club to hunt for your potential girlfriend.  If you have resistance or fear here, you're not just gonna walk in that club every Friday and talk to women.  So, you baby-step yourself.  Maybe the first Friday all you do is sit in the parking-lot of the club for 30 mins and then drive away.  Maybe the second Friday, you get out of your car and just walk around outside the club for 30 mins and then leave.  Maybe the third Friday you go inside the club for 30 minutes and then leave. See?  You are baby-stepping your actions on a routine that will eventually lead you to getting a girlfriend -- over time.  You are slowly building-up momentum and confidence to get you to your goal of obtaining a girlfriend.  This strategy is called baby-stepping.  It's a hugely effective strategy that you all should be using!  One major reason why people fail (or worse, don't even try) is that they don't know how to strategically baby-step the implementation of their goals.  A mountain is moved by a thousand baby-steps.  Think of your goals this way instead of trying to move the mountain in one or two goes.  Ain't gonna work like that.  Not for big-goals which are often scary and intimidating.  That's why achievement of big-goals is a rare and valuable thing.  Most people don't do it, and more importantly, they don't know how to do it. They lack strategic-thinking.  You wanna be like a general on the battlefield of your life, with one eye on your final-goal and at the same time with the other eye on the little tactical, strategic maneuvers that will add-up to your final victory over time.  The trap that most people fall into is they want the girlfriend right now -- they want the quick-fix.  That's a huge trap. That mentality often, but not always, leads to disaster.

@Joseph Maynor Haha, jesus! thats some high-quality advice man! Thank you!!
I did what I could while reading right away. I wrote down my goal, and then putted the strategy in place. THIS IS SO MY PROBLEM. Thank you for operating in my mind like that. 

So in conclusion, my problem is "wanting the quick-fix". I've heard this so many times, and Leo talks about this. But I think I didn't put any attention to it since I didn't realized it was this big of a trap, and that I had a problem with it. So nice to realize that now. This stress of trying to move a mountain every time I set my eyes on something is killing me- my energy, and slowly drag me down to passive state. 

So I can see how big of a deal this is. But it makes me wonder, cuz my mind is so black and white most times. Now I just want to focus on this goal, right? Its a big and compelling goal of getting me forward. So its a good goal (the way Leo talks about in his goal setting video). But I got more things than one goal that is important. And not in a manic way, but life is more than one thing right. Like say, I have this goal, but I sleep in every morning, and have a hard time with procrastination. Thats also a big deal that kind of twine into my big goal. So:

1. Can I have more than one baby-step goal? In that case, how many can I have with out overstepping?
2. And how would you prioritize them?  
3. How would you deal with negative time thinking, like "I got to little time". 

Sorry if I'm kind of badgering you with confusing questions. I know they're kind of personal to my situation (I think), and that it might be hard for you to tell me what to do, but I'm glad for the help I can get! I can be an extremely effective person, but stress is my Achilles heel. And it really sabotage my progress. 

Edited August 14, 2017 by Fredrik Andersson

[Spiral]

@Joseph Maynor@Fredrik Andersson I strongly advice against trying to find long term relationships in nightclubs, unless you really enjoy the "get drunk and party" lifestyle. Too many neurotic and/or fuckgirls. On the other hand if you want to get better with girls then it's a easy way to do it. Don't get me wrong I like the method just not the example.

Edited August 17, 2017 by Spiral