Posted July 30, 2017 None of you might expect this coming from a guy and I've really haven't told this to anyone really except for maybe my therapist and my best friend but, yeah even at 28 years old the prospect of anything to do with sex and romance really doesn't interest me and I doubt that it ever will. When you guys think back to your preteens and early teens around I think 11, 12, and 13 did you all have the same feeling whenever you had sex education and learnt about puberty like that yuck factor. I mean when I think about it even at this age I'm almost 30 still a virgin and guess what happy to be a virgin and not ashamed. I just really think that it's just gross when I think about it. I mean the penis is a place where I pee from and it really disgusts me that it's the same place that holds the ingredients for life so to speak. I mean when I think about it I was hoping there could be a different way. It just seems like the Universe is playing a joke on us. The same place our body creates people is near (if you're a woman) and actually is (if you're a man) next to a sewage processing plant. I mean that's just messed up. It's funny when I think about how I grew up and anything to do with sex I just laughed at and saw it as some kind of joke. Then when everyone the same age as me were dating and were so interested in it I never really cared. I really just wanted friends that I could have a deep connection with and never cared about romance in any type of way at all. Maybe it has something to do with my parents divorce. It's funny this rabbi was asking me so when are you going to get married. I'm all like in a couple of years but, to tell the truth I most likely never will and don't care for it. I have bigger fish to fry. Also I'm kinda thinking to myself as crazy as this may sound that giving birth could quite possibly be an act of rape. You're really forcing existence on someone who didn't ask for it. Especially if that someone is going to suffer. For those out there saying we owe so much to our parents for giving us life I actually have a counter argument. First of all Leo says we don't even exist but, that's not my counter argument. Even if Leo is wrong and it turns out somehow we do exists think about this for a moment. We're going to end up dying anyway (unless some time in the future they come up with some special way we can be immortal) and we didn't even exist for the time that we existed I'm wondering in a million years of being non-existent that we weren't aware of were we suffering for all those years?? Anyway it feels good to put this stuff out there and be validated. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 (edited) @Revolutionary Think Hmmm I never heard anyone describe it like that. Interesting. Quote I'm almost 30 still a virgin and guess what happy to be a virgin and not ashamed. Boy, the time someone grows up in really changes a lot of things! Last week I was this type of group therapy I go to every week. Somehow sex was brought up. Someone was talking about having sex before being married, and this lady who is honestly one of the nicest people out there, and someone I never saw get upset about anything in the slightest got very, very upset about someone having sex before marriage. She went on about how people don't have dignity and ethics anymore. The other girl who was talking about having sex before marriage got really passionate about her opinion too. I had no idea people felt this passionate about having sex before marriage! I know some religious people do, but this had nothing to do with the religious aspect. It was solely based on having morals. The lady against it was in her 70s I believe. I kind of new this a little bit, but American society changed around the mid 60s. Before then it was looked at by mostly everyone that having sex before marriage was this horrible unmoral thing. I know Christians and maybe some other religions feel that way, but I'm talking about American society in general feeling that way regardless of religious beliefs. I was interested in this and my research towards this topic pretty much confirms this belief. My question is what happens if you never get married or get married at like 60 lol. I'm not saying everyone felt this way, but most people did at that time. I don't really know how to help you with your problem but I wanted to give you this example so you could see that being your age and being a virgin wouldn't be weird, and would be expected if you lived 60 years ago. Society has a funny effect on situations doesn't it?! Do you have any strong erges (spell check ain't helping with that one lol) to have sex? It's funny going back to my example. I'm 22 almost 23 and when people hear that I am a virgin they think it is so weird, and they can't understand it. The example I gave made me feel better about still being a virgin, and if you still have any hangups about it maybe it will help you feel better. For me personally the erges are too strong. I'm f'n ready. It's just hard for me to be social right now in my life. I'm taking babysteps every day. That is why I asked you about the eregs, because mine are really strong sometimes. Did you ever start the life purpose course? I get that it is expensive, but it's a better use of your money than something like 5 video games, right? Even if it does't end up helping what-so-ever I still think it is totally worth the risk. I mean it's not like the course was designed by some dude off the street you know nothing about. If you like his videos than it is worth a shot. I don't understand why more people don't buy the life purpose course and the book list. THE POSSIBLE VALUE IS WORTH THE RISK (money). I strongly recommend them unless money is tight right now. Edited July 30, 2017 by TeamBills Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Did you even listen to what I said? This isn't a problem it's an orientation. I'm asexual and have no problem with it. I just wanted to get people's philosophical insights on what they think about the way I feel. This isn't a problem to be solved. It's the way I feel and I have no problem with it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Seriously!? @TeamBills 18 minutes ago, TeamBills said: Do you have any strong erges (spell check ain't helping with that one lol) to have sex? what you asked. What I said. 40 minutes ago, Revolutionary Think said: the prospect of anything to do with sex and romance really doesn't interest me and I doubt that it ever will. So shouldn't that answer your question?? Well the answer is no. Anyway if you want to learn more check this. http://www.whatisasexuality.com/intro/ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Quote Did you even listen to what I said? This isn't a problem it's an orientation. I'm asexual and have no problem with it. I just wanted to get people's philosophical insights on what they think about the way I feel. This isn't a problem to be solved. It's the way I feel and I have no problem with it. I wasn't trying to solve it. Quote the prospect of anything to do with sex and romance really doesn't interest me and I doubt that it ever will. You can have erges and still be turned off by them. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Quote I just wanted to get people's philosophical insights on what they think about the way I feel. The example I gave was very philosophical in how society can effect this topic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Alright just making sure you read the entire thing before you responded. Ya thought I'm still thinking of taking Leo's life purpose course. The problem is though that I'm worried that it's not going to provide specifics for me. What I'm trying to do right now is making big on YouTube my main purpose in life was to find a way to reform the education system. The way the education system is now doesn't really teach people life skills or how to make money. Just to repeat a bunch of information because it's on a stupid test and how to forget it the next day. So I wrote an article on what I think about the whole thing. http://bakshandehariel.wixsite.com/website/single-post/2017/01/03/Execution-of-Solutions Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 10 minutes ago, Revolutionary Think said: 10 minutes ago, Revolutionary Think said: The way the education system is now doesn't really teach people life skills or how to make money. Just to repeat a bunch of information because it's on a stupid test and how to forget it the next day. It is a HUGE pet peeve of mine. I could definitely go into a rant into it. It seems like it would be very difficult to change. I haven't read the link yet. I think you would need a very large group of people to have a chance at making a difference. A very big project. Quote Ya thought I'm still thinking of taking Leo's life purpose course. The problem is though that I'm worried that it's not going to provide specifics for me. That was kind of my point. I totally understand why you would be worried about taking the course. Especially with the price tag. Even though you have those feelings I still feel like it is worth the CHANCE of it greatly improving your life. Even if you get nothing from it I believe it worth it because of the chance of it completely changing your life. Very few things in life are a 100% sure thing. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Lmao you think it's gross when you never had sex in the first place? You're like the people who say sushi is gross but never tried them. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 (edited) I'm not sure what the purpose of your thread is within the context of this forum. Could you clarify that? What do you want from us? Edited July 30, 2017 by Markus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 (edited) @Revolutionary Think When you are thinking rationally, of course sex seems gross. Sex is not a rational thing. Sex is a play of masculine and feminine energy. Even in same sex couples, the play between those two components is still there. The woman can also play the masculine (dominant) part and the man can play the feminine (receiving) part. When I was a virgin, I was also looking at things from the perspective that sex is gross. BUT, once I actually had sex, I figured out that sex is not just two people rubbing genitals together. It's a whole experience. It's you giving yourself totally to the other person and the other person receiving all of you, accepting all that you are. It's a game of pushing and pulling away, an alternation of slow and rapid movements, a building up of sexual energy to the point of dissolution into the act itself. You may not have a need for it. That's great to hear. Some are addicted to sex and romance. But, that does not mean it would not make your life better. Sex is the ultimate act of intimacy. You won't ever know what true intimacy is until you have sex. You may not have great sex in the beginning, but once you have one truly deep, bonding and mindblowing sexual experience, that might change your mind about sex entirely and make you start to look at it as being a sacred, spiritual act, not a gross one. That's what happened to me. Some people may not feel the need to read. Some may not feel the need to go to the gym. Some may not feel the need to socialize. Although, I doubt that the ones who don't do those things are happier than the ones who do. You are here to try everything that life has to offer. Don't limit yourself. Don't make excuses. Play the field for a while. If you don't like it, you can always go back. "Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." -- Mark Twain Edited July 30, 2017 by Dan Arnautu ”Unaccompanied by positive action, rest may only depress you.” -- George Leonard Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 @Markus Ya I guess as pragmatic things go nothing much. Just wanted people to know that people like us actually exist. I guess what I really wanted was a feeling of people acknowledging my position. I talked to my professor about asexuality and I said it's not like people discriminate because people are asexual it's just that people ignore them. Then my professor said well some would say ignoring people IS a form of discrimination. So I guess it's not so much the topic itself that I want feedback on but, just to make the issue visible so people know that it's a possibility and they don't jump to conclusions and make assumptions. On a separate note I feel like that Today the voices of reason and centrality are being marginalized, while the voices of others who are highly partisan and dogmatic are being amplified. Take for instance the 2016 election I was on Trumps side but, not because I like his personality or agree with everything he said. I just thought he knew a lot about business and economics and that could help the country out. Although if you say you support a person like him people are quick to jump to conclusions and call you a racist and a sexist. Well if I had another option like if I could run for President despite my age I'd most likely tell people to vote for me instead of him. Since that wasn't the case though I just thought he could do something to help the economy and job market we found ourselves in. People make assumptions and jump to conclusions instead of taking something apart piece by piece and being mindful about it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 @Revolutionary Think Yeah, okay. That's something to be mindful about. Generalization is practical in the sense that people just won't be able to process all the nuances. But we could certainly be a lot more open to nuance. Thanks. Love ya, Markus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 @Revolutionary Think 3 hours ago, Revolutionary Think said: None of you might expect this coming from a guy and I've really haven't told this to anyone really except for maybe my therapist and my best friend but, yeah even at 28 years old the prospect of anything to do with sex and romance really doesn't interest me and I doubt that it ever will. When you guys think back to your preteens and early teens around I think 11, 12, and 13 did you all have the same feeling whenever you had sex education and learnt about puberty like that yuck factor. I mean when I think about it even at this age I'm almost 30 still a virgin and guess what happy to be a virgin and not ashamed. I just really think that it's just gross when I think about it. I mean the penis is a place where I pee from and it really disgusts me that it's the same place that holds the ingredients for life so to speak. I mean when I think about it I was hoping there could be a different way. It just seems like the Universe is playing a joke on us. The same place our body creates people is near (if you're a woman) and actually is (if you're a man) next to a sewage processing plant. I mean that's just messed up. It's funny when I think about how I grew up and anything to do with sex I just laughed at and saw it as some kind of joke. Then when everyone the same age as me were dating and were so interested in it I never really cared. I really just wanted friends that I could have a deep connection with and never cared about romance in any type of way at all. Maybe it has something to do with my parents divorce. It's funny this rabbi was asking me so when are you going to get married. I'm all like in a couple of years but, to tell the truth I most likely never will and don't care for it. I have bigger fish to fry. Also I'm kinda thinking to myself as crazy as this may sound that giving birth could quite possibly be an act of rape. You're really forcing existence on someone who didn't ask for it. Especially if that someone is going to suffer. For those out there saying we owe so much to our parents for giving us life I actually have a counter argument. First of all Leo says we don't even exist but, that's not my counter argument. Even if Leo is wrong and it turns out somehow we do exists think about this for a moment. We're going to end up dying anyway (unless some time in the future they come up with some special way we can be immortal) and we didn't even exist for the time that we existed I'm wondering in a million years of being non-existent that we weren't aware of were we suffering for all those years?? Anyway it feels good to put this stuff out there and be validated. Hi, I have a book you may be interested in reading. This book is also for anyone else that wants to heal their sexuality. Of course by all means, if you feel sex isn't right for you and you are happy then proceed on your journey. A lot of our subconscious beliefs about sexuality stem from early childhood and sometimes religious beliefs we are brought up with. I was told growing up that if I had sex, I was going to hell, and I was very afraid for a long time. These types of beliefs can prevent people from being present when they have sex, and enjoying it fully. Or make people feel that sex is bad and dirty. I thought sex was dirty for a long time too. It may be something you may want to look into. I'm reading this book right now and I'm finding it to be very helpful and healing. 8 years ago my ex bf raped me and I had 3 months of vaginal bruising. I had to end my relationship with a 6 month restraining order and I moved out of town for safety reasons. I was also apart of the adult entertainment industry for many years and ended my career after having a near death experience from someone drugging me in a bar. I left the industry hating men, and very confused about relationships and sexuality. I went to a hypnotherapist/life coach to relieve a lot of what happened. And my recent ex bf also cured a lot of my limiting beliefs. The book is really making a difference in changing the way I feel about all of this. I'm proud of you for speaking up about this and expressing what is going in your life. You have my support. Book: Real Sex: Why Everything You Learned About Sex is Wrong by Mike Lousada, Louise Mazanti (Sex and relationship experts). Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 (edited) Not to sound too harsh but this post just sounds like a guy who gave up trying to have sex a long time ago and he's doing everything he can to maintain his identity from this idea of "sex" and making it out to be some disturbing act. You haven't even tried it. And even if you did try.. With your current attitude towards it there's no way in hell you could allow yourself to enjoy it because it's already disgusting in your eyes. Maybe one day you can open yourself up to it though. Edited July 30, 2017 by Truth Memento Mori Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Well, if you have no drive for it, and no problem, then good for you. You'll save yourself a lot of hassle. But then again, maybe you're missing out on something cool out of fear or closedmindedness. If your logic is that it's gross, how do you take a shit in the morning? You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 @Revolutionary Think Sex in itself is for procreation. It is a requirement for making a mini-me, and keeping the race alive. Anything else is a story we create for ourselves, either gross and/or pleasurable. It's just a story based on our accumulated and present belief system. Journal: Rediscovering Creativity Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 When your mother, partner, family have pain in the neck, or the back and you make them a massage to alleviate the muscular tension or the pain do you think is gross? No you are doing something beautiful, human and altrustic. Sex is the same, you are mutually providing and receiving pleasure. Just view it like you are making a massage with your dick. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 Look Leo if I could live in a world where we'd just eat for taste and not for survival and in a world where we didn't shit and piss I'd opt in for that world. If I had it my way I could do all sort of things like fly and transport moleculary because that would be awesome. Shitting is quite gross but, at least it goes into the toilet and not on your hands or body. If taking a shit meant that we had to touch our own shit and rub it on ourselves before we could flush it down then I really don't know I'd probably just opt for being sedated my entire life until I eventually passed away. Sex involves another body and their "business" and that to me is kind of icky. Then again I might be childish and juvenile but, Leo I remember what you said to that guy who told you if you never tried smoking and drinking how do you know you wont like it. Then you told him if he ever tried drinking his own pee how would he like that. That argument is a far too easy one to make no? If you never tried french kissing your own dog how would you know you wouldn't like it? If you never tried running naked in Antarctica in subzero temperature how would you know you wont like it etc. Think of the implications of this though. If there are tons of people like me who don't care about romance and sex think of all the other amazing things we could be spending our time and energy on. Chasing after scientific pursuits and creating really amazing art. In fact I got involved with 3D printing and I've become addicted to designing things in CAD software. I also love using my 3D pen to create things. Once I start it's very hard for me to stop. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Posted July 30, 2017 @Revolutionary Think You know in India why they eat with the right hand only? Because they wipe their ass hole with the left Like I said, no drive, no problem. I love sex, but I've spent most of my life turning my head the other way cause I got bigger fish to fry. It's sort of a blessing to not care about sex. The sex drive is responsible for a lot of suffering. You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
