How Did You Guys Develop Discipline?

[renegade_bee]

There are so many people on this forum and other personal development forums that seem to have amazing discipline and are working hard on their dreams. I see people with incredible fitness, people who are reading a lot, people that are immersing themselves in a topic (music, painting, business,...). Meanwhile I can't even work as much as the average person even thought I'm ambitious. I want to do so much and I'm still young but how do i work hard, follow through and die without regrets of wasted time? What is your secret?

[vizual]

Become passionate and excited by the things you want to do. No more discipline needed. You only need discipline for things you don't really want to do. And when you get so much momentum from the excitement in your life, the small, pesky things like paying bills, house cleaning, doing groceries etc. become a breeze.

When you are not excited by things you have to do all day, pure discipline is only going to get you so far. You will not reach greatness

[Avi]

@vizual You bring up an interesting point that I've never thought of before. You don't need discipline if you love what you're doing. You just do and not think about it. 

[TruthSeeker]

44 minutes ago, Avi said:

@vizual You bring up an interesting point that I've never thought of before. You don't need discipline if you love what you're doing. You just do and not think about it. 

Not everyone loves what they do all the time...I doubt it...for the times when one is not as in love with what he is doing, he needs discipline to succeed.

 

[renegade_bee]

@TruthSeeker ^this. I'm incredibly excited by the things I see myself accomplishing if I could just do the work, put in the hours and get the job done. But I'm struggling to even keep up with my day to day tasks. I know it must somehow be possible since so many people do reach some of their goals such as fitness, instrument etc... I would be really grateful to anyone that can help me out.

[vizual]

If you are not willing to find something you are passionate about you are only going to find tips to 'trick' the ego into doing things it does not want to do. You are not going to find a fundamental solution which will end all your struggles in to reaching whatever you want to reach.

For example; make a schedule of things that have to be done for a certain time and if you do these things you reward yourself with something. These tricks will only help for a certain period of time so be creative to keep switching it up.

[Nick]

Big goal=Big motivation=No need to discipline yourself anymore, because you are goal driven.

So set big goals. Throw "quick fixes" away. 

Usually, habits can be developed after 21 days of struggle discipline, the rest of the time you go with the flow of going through motions, thus doing the work.

[Psychonaut]

I try to build it actively by doing things like leaving a chocolate bar on my table and only allowing me to eat one piece a day. I used to be able to eat two bars of chocolate in no time. Sometimes one bar was already finished before I had walked back from the store. Meditation and lots of the activities people do on here build discipline. Checking every 5 minutes if there is a new interesting topic does not. Noted.

[TheFrown]

Discipline can be tricky. 

If you always follow the pathway of least resistance you will never improve. If you push aginst it to hard you will find yourself paralyzed by the pressure.

What I do is try to improve in small increments. Over time it really does wonders. 

[Lifes2short]

I would have to say "manifestation".

Once you have acknowledged that you want improve on certain aspects of your life this is the start. The mind is a powerful weapon, and you can train it just like you can train muscles in your body. You have to start thinking about it all the time, when you wake up in the morning think about "it", when you go to bed think about "it", when you are at work think about "it", any chance you can get think about "it".

By manifesting, you are basically manipulating your subconscious. You will start behaving in a way without you even knowing, your choices will change, and this will ultimately alter the course of your life. Just be aware that this is a progression. You do not wake up the next morning and become the most self motivated person ever. Understand that it is gradual. All you have to do is think about it and dream about it, things will start coming into practice my brother.

[JevinR]

 

 

 

Edited February 19, 2016 by JevinR

[7thLetter]

Everyone who has posted here has some really good points. I guess I could say that it does come down to the 21-day rule to build a habit and becoming passionate about it. I would consider myself a pretty disciplined person, but the habits that I do now took a ton of struggle at first before they became something that I do consistently. From what I remember, before I started consistently going to the gym, I was skipping class in highschool just to gym, I was only going 1-2 days a week. Then I found my passion in working out. Another habit that I will mention is that I go out consistently and approach women in malls, clubs, etc. At first it was really tough, sometimes I would literally sit around for hours and not even approach. It was like I was just a guy who would sit around enjoying nature, when my mission was to approach girls. But then I started going out and approaching with other guys, we would do 30-day challenges so that we could keep each other accountable, and that really helped us a lot. Today it's really easy for me to just go out there and approach any girl, doesn't take a huge push for me anymore.

[Nathalie]

15 hours ago, DrMatthewsausage said:

There are so many people on this forum and other personal development forums that seem to have amazing discipline and are working hard on their dreams. I see people with incredible fitness, people who are reading a lot, people that are immersing themselves in a topic (music, painting, business,...). Meanwhile I can't even work as much as the average person even thought I'm ambitious. I want to do so much and I'm still young but how do i work hard, follow through and die without regrets of wasted time? What is your secret?

@DrMatthewsausage  Maybe you're just to severe ? How would it be if you loved yourself a little more and listen your inner voice telling you the way that fits to you ?

If you love and enjoy yourself I can imagine that the power will flow..

[Nathalie]

15 hours ago, DrMatthewsausage said:

There are so many people on this forum and other personal development forums that seem to have amazing discipline and are working hard on their dreams. I see people with incredible fitness, people who are reading a lot, people that are immersing themselves in a topic (music, painting, business,...). Meanwhile I can't even work as much as the average person even thought I'm ambitious. I want to do so much and I'm still young but how do i work hard, follow through and die without regrets of wasted time? What is your secret?

@DrMatthewsausage  Maybe you're just to severe ? How would it be if you loved yourself a little more and listen your inner voice telling you the way that fits to you ?

If you love and enjoy yourself I can imagine that the power will flow..

[JeffR1]

@DrMatthewsausage I feel the 'secret' is in your mind! Being your authentic self helps, and yet there are some hurdles one needs to jump over from time to time. I too need to find discipline at times and there remains aspects of my life I would prefer to be different (work in progress).

Some of the things I feel have helped me come from others, particularly in books that I have read. Some that have helped me, and continue to do so now, include:

'Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at change'. Dr Wayne W. Dyer

'Feel the fear, and do it anyway'. Susan J. Jeffers

'What you think about you bring about'. Dr John Demartini

As a practical example (of the kind I need to practice now and again), I attended a conference yesterday for work. Earlier in the week I really did not want to attend, as I felt it did not really relate to me job directly (a corporate thing). I was thinking, 'boring - what a waste of time'. 

Then I remembered Dr Dyer's quote and so I thought about it. I thought 'okay, if my employer wants me to attend this conference and is willing to pay my wages for the day to do so, maybe I can go. At least it will get me out the office for the day. Maybe I can learn something I don't know. I can relax on the train to and from the conference. What the hey, I'll go'.

So, guess what happened? It was one of the best conferences I've been to. It was more about working in teams to achieve positive outcomes and not to the centric topic I thought it would be. I had a fantastic day; the speakers were excellent and very inspirational. I came home feeling really invigorated and inspired.

This has happened to me many times and each time it is easier for me to become aware of my thinking and feelings. Awareness equals present moment. And in the present moment, I have the choice as to how I look at things. I changed the way I looked at things and the things I looked at changed. You too have this choice and power! Best wishes.

[Bronsoval]

18 hours ago, DrMatthewsausage said:

@TruthSeeker ^this. I'm incredibly excited by the things I see myself accomplishing if I could just do the work, put in the hours and get the job done. But I'm struggling to even keep up with my day to day tasks. I know it must somehow be possible since so many people do reach some of their goals such as fitness, instrument etc... I would be really grateful to anyone that can help me out.

If you don't love the mundane tasks that are necessary to do what you love, you gotta trick your brain into believing that you actually do love to do them.  This is easy!  Just say "I LOVE (blank) !!! With the enthusiasm of a high school mascot.  Ham it up! Put on a show! Eventually you will believe it.  Repeat every single time you are about to do something you don't want to do but you know its right.  If you approach laundry day with, "FUCK.  I hate doing the fucking laundry." it's no wonder you don't like it!    

[Van]

"Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going." - Jim Rohn

I second what @Nick said.
Creating discipline begins with setting goals, and forcing yourself to do meet those goals everyday. At first it will be hard but after "21 days" it will get easier. If you stop it will become hard again (so don't stop). The book "The Power of Habit" discusses this, along with the snowball effect theory. When you create good habits, it will leak into everything you do (and vice-versa for bad habits). 

[Elton]

@DrMatthewsausage taking baby steps, i'm still working on discipline though...

Edited February 20, 2016 by Elton

[Ben Landrail]

Upon waking up, if I don't feel like getting out of bed at 6 am, I ask myself: "Do you want to be a mediocre loser or an outstanding human being?". Usually, it does the job. If not, I just force myself. 

Lack of discipline is often caused by three things: poor habits, lack of clarity and fear. 

By poor habits I mean that the more you act in an undisciplined way, doing stupid shit, the harder it is to become disciplined. The cure is simple - you must start doing the right thing regardless of your emotional state.

By lack of clarity I mean not having an overarching goal, a sense of direction and a well thought-out concrete plan. The solution is simple but not easy, you have to think about your priorities and commit to something.

By fear I mean the fear that your plan might be flawed, that you're just wasting time etc. The only way to deal with it, I believe, is to stop the inner dialogue. Just do what you set out to do. 

With regard to practical tools, I highly recommend the book, "Hell Week" by Bertrand Larsson (spelling may be different). I just went throught the 'hell week', and it changed me completely. It's like I grew a spine and a couple of extra balls. Try it, it's incredible.