Feedback And Experience With Meditation

[ValiantSalvatore]

Hey, I just wanted to ask for some feedback on my practice and some insights on experience I had during the last two years and what they mean.

I am doing Shinzen Youngs technique of See, Hear , Feel of course not perfectly. I just do see in , see out , hear in , hear out , feel in and feel out. For those familiar, I am not using note gone or somehow experiencing flow not sure how I can do that. Gone works yet I keep forgetting. For anyone interested here is a link to the practice, http://www.shinzen.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/SeeHearFeelIntroduction_ver1.8.pdf

I am doing this now for 8 months or 10, not sure and before that, I was just experimenting around with various meditation techniques for a couple of months. Like just breathing /counting breath , do nothing , who am I , body scanning and maybe some others. For one time I was just starting at a cup asking who is the perceiver, who perceives this thought, who is that etc . Had a couple of non-relevant insights at least they did not seem to change anything externally maybe internally. For like 1 h and then went to work in a foreign country this was the heaviest load of cognitive dissonance I ever had lol.

So, while traveling I had a strange state of "being" I was buying food at a shop and seat on a bench in the shop.While sitting down I just noticed a quite strong feeling of balance and equanimity. I was just so content with being at that place at that time or rather just doing something simple, like eating. I remembered during that time I was listening to Sam Harris - Waking up and there was a story of a girl who has been announced enlightened by one meditation teacher there. And she apparently was so blissed out and had no thoughts, yet during some occasion, she joined them traveling and they were sitting in a plane (Sam + other travelers + the enlightened woman) and one of them asked her if she really is so blissed out and asked her when was the last thought she had. She started to "think"  and said hm I don't let me see, "oh this could be a thought " + " and this " + " and this" etc. etc. I don't remember what the Author said after that or what was the "moral of the story". 

To get back to the experience I remembered that story and immediately checked if there are thoughts and of course there were thoughts, yet still, there was this underlying feeling of equanimity and balance. Which held on for like 30 min or so, slowly disappearing.

Another experience I had was Piti I believe it is called it felt like parts of my body are growing and it was very pleasant. 

Another experience was that I felt a vortex for a couple of seconds in my body, Can't really tell what that was but it was weird.

And one time I actually felt like there was no self while doing nothing everything just disappeared for a couple of seconds this was at the beginning of my journey. 

 

Ok, so I don't know how relevant or useful this is for you guys and girls. Yet, if I could receive some feedback this would be quite nice. I am being very egotistical at the moment and it actually does not feel bad. Ego is supposed to be neither good or bad just ego. So, I guess I am maturing since I don't see things as black and white anymore? Also how to go deeper into the practice besides doing a retreat ( which would be optimal) or meditating longer ( yes does not guarantee that it will go deeper ) while meditating for one hour ?

[ValiantSalvatore]

@Spacious Yes, I have one. I used it quite often, yet now only once a week. Or whenever I feel the need to write smth. down. I bought a journal since I started meditation approximately and I used it consistently since then. 

I do some exercises out of books and shadow work once a week in the journal now.