Why Do People Do Selfless Acts?

[PetarKa]

The question speaks for itself. What do you think?

[Steph1988]

I ask myself first mostly ''are these so called selfless acts really selfless''.

But of course do they really need to be 100% selfless? maybe not.

The first straight answer that springs to mind tho is because it feels good probably and if most people are honest they will confirm that.

I'm extremely skeptical about most people 's selfless acts i suspect it does exist but maybe only a minority of people is capable of doing them i don't even trust myself on that i try to be as humble as possible on it because it gets thrown around way to easily.

like half of the celebrity's do "selfless acts'' these days how much virtue signaling and ego is it really?

there are more situations that are suspicious for example what about a mother who goes out of her way to cook and clean for the kids even when they are out of the house but so much that it gets annoying and calls way too much, What does she want? is all that care selfless or is she afraid that her children wont visit her anymore?is it a precaution against loneliness? it might be a perfectly valid reason but its not selfless and you can think up thousands of comparable cases.

So maybe it is almost impossible to be completely selfless.

But maybe it is better to accept that is almost impossible and so the only thing that i find comes close to an ideal is to live as honestly as possible, increase critical thinking skills and awareness and from there try to solve problems in a more non feeling but practical way.

If you want to help africa maybe not mindlessly give millions but study the history study the people and try to discover why it is poor and go from there to try to come up with practical solutions now that is harder then seeing a commercial with fly covered faces and starving villages and then crying reach for your wallet but maybe more selfless.

[Visitor]

@PetarKa The needs of the other, or others, are seen as outweighing there own need.

[PetarKa]

I've been contemplating this deeply and these are my conclusions. People do selfless acts because:

A) They think it will actually benefit them: That by being kind and giving, in the long run, they will be able do lead a better and more effortless life. Their relationships with people will be much smoother and enjoyable. And ultimately, people will actually give back and return the generosity and kindness. So technically, I wouldn't call this a genuine selfless act. These kinds of acts aren't morally wrong per se.

B) They believe that they SHOULD / MUST be kind: Religious people are a typical example of this kind of behavior, although it isn't limited only to theists. Basically, they have a strict rule in mind: kindness is good, unkindness is bad. But I do not understand where (or why) they picked up this rule and bought into it. Any ideas? I still wouldn't call this a genuine selfless act. This is basically moralization.

C) They genuinely show concern for the other individual / being: This one is the most difficult to explain. But to me it seems as though, in this case, the individual has an expanded sense of himself and it includes the person he's being kind to. It's like he identifies with the other and is now honestly concerned for his / her wellbeing. This may or may not be tightly connceted to spirituality.

D) A mix of reasons A), B), and C).

What do you think?

[Truth]

Reciprocity. There's a good read in The Happiness Hypothesis about it --> 

" Zigong asked: ‘Is there any single word that could guide one's entire life?’ The Master said: ‘Should it not be reciprocity? What you do not wish for yourself, do not do to others.’ (Analects of Confucius)"

[Erlend K]

The obvious answer is that kindness/helping makes us feel happy. A standard beginner exetcise in positive psychology is do 1 fun thing, then reflect over how that feels and how that feeling changes over the rest of the day. The next day do one philantropic action and do the same reflections. What one discovers is that the philantropic action leads to a deeper and more lasting sense of well being. 

[ajasatya]

On 7/14/2017 at 11:58 AM, PetarKa said:

Why Do People Do Selfless Acts?

why would YOU do selfless acts? studying the behavior of others is helpless.

[WaterfallMachine]

Other than what @PetarKa said, these are other possiblities.

Desire for fame. They want to look like heroes and gather people to praise them. 

Desire for admiration. They want some people or somebody to admire them. Different from fame in that it doesn't have to be that many people. It could be a certain small group or person like their parents. 

Desire for love. They want to be genuinely loved and appreciated in return. Think of how someone would help someone more if they fell in love with that person. 

Desire for influence. If you're nice, people would more likely trust and listen to you more. People can turn away someone with intelligent ideas that are too rude and distant. But there are people out there who are incompetent that can win people's hearts with their charm. 

Edited August 13, 2017 by WaterfallMachine

[Arkandeus]

what will you look back to on your life when you ''die'' and sober up as an immortal spirit? 
money and survival is an illusion, and so is death. 
the houses you gathered, the money you gathered, the power you gathered....you'll realize it doesn't matter, you can conjure up anything you want in the afterlife the same you do in your dreams, there is no lack of anything..

power doesn't matter because in the afterlife the illusion of division dissipates, power over who? yourself?
 

so what does matter? 

the acts of the heart of course. 
selfless acts cannot be understood from a viewpoint that we live with one life in which we have to survive in. 
they can only be understood if you understand your own immortality. 
selfless acts are actions of the soul

what will you look back to when you return to your primordial life beyond 'death'?

Edited August 13, 2017 by Arkandeus

[Spiral]

If you know you'll benefit from helping someone even if it's just, you feel good about it, can you really call it selflessness?