Sexual Dreaming

[Jhonny]

I have had few sexual dreams in the last few months. I have found them to be much more satisfying and relaxing than the real sexual intercourse.Can i have more control over these dreams? How can i have them more often? Any suggestions?  

[TimStr]

Lucid dreaming is the key word.

It's basically about learning how to remain fully conscious, while your mind and body fall into a dream state.
You can find lessons and books on the internet. It has become a fairly popular topic in the last two or three years.

[Spiral]

I would be really careful about making that a habit,sexual dreams or any other activities that strongly rewards you for doing nothing, can lead to unforeseen consequences.

[Dan Arnautu]

@Jhonny Careful! You can easily become addicted to that. Put your efforts into a real relationships instead.

[electroBeam]

@Dan Arnautu careful! You can become easily addicted to a real relationship! But your effort into enlightenment instead.

@Jhonny

[Prabhaker]

On 7/5/2017 at 7:44 AM, Jhonny said:

How can i have them more often? Any suggestions? 

Mahatma Gandhi at the age of seventy was having wet dreams. Forty years he struggled to remain celibate, and the only result was that he was having wet dreams. So, try to become a celibate.

[egoeimai]

You can't force dreams. But these types of dreams are due to lack of sexual activity I guess. But yeah sometimes they're better than the actual thing.

[Dan Arnautu]

@electroBeam A real relationship is still better than dreaming about having sex, wouldn't you think so?

[electroBeam]

@Dan Arnautu Well... if your goal is to have sex, lucid dreams give you that minus the problems relationships give you.

Ultimately egoic relationships have the same problem as everything else, where it cannot fulfill you. So it's not like one is more of a mature decision to make. 

It's just that society has bad connotations around people who aren't in relationships. They are perceived as nerdy antisocial and weird. Take that away and lucid dreams are a perfect substitute for someone looking for sex.

[Dan Arnautu]

10 hours ago, electroBeam said:

It's just that society has bad connotations around people who aren't in relationships. They are perceived as nerdy antisocial and weird.

Not necessarily. I haven't experienced that even though I never had a long term relationship. If you see yourself being single as a problem, people can't do anything but agree with you.

10 hours ago, electroBeam said:

@Dan Arnautu Well... if your goal is to have sex, lucid dreams give you that minus the problems relationships give you.

Maybe, but I can't say sex in lucid dreams is just like real sex.

10 hours ago, electroBeam said:

Ultimately egoic relationships have the same problem as everything else, where it cannot fulfill you. So it's not like one is more of a mature decision to make. 

Relationships don't have to be egoic. And even though they can be, you can still learn from them. 

"3 failed relationships in as many years have a much higher chance to trigger an awakening than living for 3 years in a cave, meditating ." - Eckhart Tolle

Edited July 8, 2017 by Dan Arnautu

[electroBeam]

1 hour ago, Dan Arnautu said:

"3 failed relationships in as many years have a much higher chance to trigger an awakening than living for 3 years in a cave, meditating ." - Eckhart Tolle

Hu? Heaps of people go through failed relationships, yet the population definitely isn't enlightened. That's a strange comment ton make. 

Edited July 8, 2017 by electroBeam

[electroBeam]

1 hour ago, Dan Arnautu said:

Relationships don't have to be egoic. And even though they can be, you can still learn from them. 

There wouldn't need to be this set of rules/contract called a relationship if it wasn't egoic

Relationships are designed for people who are trying to get something. There is literally no other reason for having one.

Have you noticed that cells in our bodies aren't in relationships? Have you noticed that ants and bees aren't in relationships? It's because they arent individualistic. 

Edited July 8, 2017 by electroBeam

[Prabhaker]

2 hours ago, Dan Arnautu said:

"3 failed relationships in as many years have a much higher chance to trigger an awakening than living for 3 years in a cave, meditating ." - Eckhart Tolle

Avoidance of relationships in an attempt to avoid pain is not the answer either. The pain is there anyway. Three failed relationships in as many years are more likely to force you into awakening than three years on a desert island or shut away in your room. But if you could bring intense presence into your aloneness, that would work for you too. ~ Eckhart Tolle

Eckhart Tolle is admitting that relationship brings pain. By this logic all masochists can be awakened easily. He is not advocating aloneness , because renouncing the world is not his path. Awakening through failed relationships is much difficult than living in cave, meditating. Failed relationships alone  can't force you into awakening unless to try to live in present moment/ meditate.

[Dan Arnautu]

 

12 hours ago, electroBeam said:

There wouldn't need to be this set of rules/contract called a relationship if it wasn't egoic

Relationships are designed for people who are trying to get something. There is literally no other reason for having one.

Have you noticed that cells in our bodies aren't in relationships? Have you noticed that ants and bees aren't in relationships? It's because they arent individualistic. 

@electroBeam No need to spiritually twist words. You know I wasn't talking on an existential level.

[Shanmugam]

@electroBeam  This reminds me of the post you made in the other thread which is about how to get enlightened.. I think since Eckhart Tolle went through an awakening after depression, he thinks that everyone who gets depressed about failures have good chances of getting enlightened.. 

May it is true for some people.. They get depressed because of failed relationships and think 'why the hell no one wants to live with me, what kind of person am I? who the hell am I", and then they end up doing a self-inquiry.

Or they may say "No wonder why no one wants to live with me, even I don't want to live with me anymore... wait a minute, am I one or two?" 

Just a joke.. 

[Principium Nexus]

20 hours ago, electroBeam said:

There wouldn't need to be this set of rules/contract called a relationship if it wasn't egoic

Relationships are designed for people who are trying to get something. There is literally no other reason for having one.

Have you noticed that cells in our bodies aren't in relationships? Have you noticed that ants and bees aren't in relationships? It's because they arent individualistic. 

Being able to count on each other in any relationship is not bad. Sexual relationships with a partner are so much more than an egoic act, if you meet the right person then the ego literally melts away. The whole idea of being in a relationship is about sharing, not only taking! If this is out of balance you might speak of egoistic intentions, but then you idea of a relationship is completely wrong or you just have met the wrong person.

Love is anything but ego.. Fear to love is the ego, what could you possibly get out of it, right?