Never-ending Story Of Improving The Life?

[mia_lea]

Life gives us challenges. In my understanding, if you want to become a better version of it is an ongoing process of self-improvement, day by day. I know at the end of the day that the effort is worth it. But at the same time, I feel frustrated, tired and overwhelmed because I have a feeling that it is a never-ending story - I solve one problem/face one challenge/improve one aspect in my life and there will be NEXT one. Is there any problem with my understanding this? Maybe I attract the problems? Maybe it is all about system thinking – if I change one thing in my life it will influence others? How can I find myself while struggling with that? What do you think?

[Dantas]

@mia_lea

True self improvement will make it easier as you go, which means the point of self improvement is to stop caring about your problems so much, in a suffering manner. When you improve one aspect of your life, it will be easier to overcome the next one, but bear in mind all of those challanges are designed to be overcome, only so that you get into a place of surrenderness. 

Which means you keep working but from an easier state of mind, without clinging so much to fix everything at once. Keep working and just keep your cool, it will get easier.

[mia_lea]

@Dantas Thank you for your support. I know I will deal with everything but at the same time, I struggle to solve these problems as I go to extremes. I have a feeling that I am a master at that..

[Dantas]

@mia_lea

I started a project last winter and I was very anxious to see it's completion. For a year a half, things became much smother and it appears, it's going to be complete due 2018. But now I don't mind it very much, even though I'm in love with my work and I feel proud, there's aways something else, something next.

Everyone has moments in their day. It's a lot better to accept these extremes, once they've happened. I'm no stranger.

The problem is we're always looking for something in the future, something we didn't get yet. Always. But eventually with enough work, you'll sort that out.

The first step is to recognize it for what is, part for the course, and keep moving forward. And if you're struggling with something in particular on your Journey, recognize this is actually a great opportunity to accept what's happening, because later you'll find yourself on a higher level. When that happens, it'll seem like it wasn't even that complicated.

[WaterfallMachine]

You can learn from an anime called One Punch Man that shows what a life of being the best without effort would be like. 

One Punch Man is a superhero named Saitama strong enough to defeat any villain in one punch. His physical powers over other superheroes is Godlike. You can imagine him as some kind of success story inspiring other superheroes to fight evil the best they can and is inspired everyday to become better. But that's not what it is.

He punches villains taller than cities down in one blow. He punches so hard he can make the rain momentarily stop. He punched one guy from the moon speeding up in one sold punch that made every cloud in the Earth to part.

But instead it seems boring. Meaningless. He doesn't have the same drive to become stronger like he used to. Fearlessness for others might be a dream. But his lack of fear is what made things seem empty for him.

Imagine being at the end of every external goal you have in life — as some perfect being. That's awesome — but after a while you might ask, "Is that it?"

Instead of achieving satisfaction in results, achieve satisfaction in the pursuit of things. Whether your motivation is with curiosity, with a sense of pride in achievement, an internal drive from compassion or something else. Find something that you want to do not for a goal but for the sake of it. 

Edited July 5, 2017 by WaterfallMachine

[Nahm]

@mia_lea They're not problems, they're the vehicle by which you grow & expand. See your friend in challenges.

[Moreira]

When your process of self-actualization becomes draining, is because yo want the results so bad that end up frustrated and tired.

Enjoy the process, dont get obsessed with the goal.

At the same time visualize how would be the best version of yourself, and then focus all your energy to the points you need to improve.

Sometimes we want to become better but dont know our weaknesses or what we need to fix.

Edited July 5, 2017 by Moreira

[Arkandeus]

On 7/3/2017 at 11:00 AM, mia_lea said:

Life gives us challenges. In my understanding, if you want to become a better version of it is an ongoing process of self-improvement, day by day. I know at the end of the day that the effort is worth it. But at the same time, I feel frustrated, tired and overwhelmed because I have a feeling that it is a never-ending story - I solve one problem/face one challenge/improve one aspect in my life and there will be NEXT one. Is there any problem with my understanding this? Maybe I attract the problems? Maybe it is all about system thinking – if I change one thing in my life it will influence others? How can I find myself while struggling with that? What do you think?

it is supposed to be never-ending and that is the fun of it, you're starting to get in touch with the essence of enlightening
there will always be a NEXT step , something new to learn, and you want that, because that means you will always be able to expand and enjoy new things.  

the ultimate lesson, is that it's not about achieving something, it's simple but it's not about the destination it's about the journey.  
you will never be ''done'', there never going to be something that you will do that will allow you to go ''ah ,I'm finally there'' never.  
whether it's a new job, a new house, a lover, a friend, kids, never, never...  
 

drop all conditions, and realize that life is now, be happy just because you're improving, because you're tackling on new challenges, if being challenged makes you happy then you will always be happy.  

which requires a switch of perspective, a challenge is not a way to achieve something anymore, a challenge is a source of excitement and fun because it does exactly that, challenge you, take fun in the feeling of wanting to create something, not into that which you create.  
I'm literally talking about a feeling, that feeling you feel when you long or desire for something, be grateful for it, feel the energy of it, the vitality, and be appreciative of it, feel how it moves you to new places, and that without it you wouldn't be able to even move.  

people who are depressed lack desire and motivation and they are literally stuck in their homes unable to move, and I know this from experience, this is real. 
if not for our desires we wouldn't be able to even move, yet the first thing we do when we feel desire is to not appreciate the feeling, we compare our desire to what we have, and we punish it with pain! 
"oh I'm feeling desire for something, something that I don't have! desire is making me realize what I don't have!pain pain pain, I must get what I don't have as soon as possible''  
desire didn't come and make you feel like you're missing something, 
the very presence of desiring is already something given to you that you didn't have before, it is a gift of real energy
the second you desire something you've already added something to your life

desire and longing is real energy, if you can get to a place where you're thankful that these feelings are moving you, giving you energy to go after what you want, you will be in bliss, and the results never matter, what you achieve, never matters, its simply a signpost ''go there''  ''go here''  
it doesn't matter where you go, life in its infinite intelligence can make anything joyful.  
just see goals as signposts : ''oh now I'm going towards there, oh now I'm going there'', see how desires moves you,it's not about getting somewhere, everywhere is fine, everywhere is perfect , it's about the moving 

Edited July 6, 2017 by Arkandeus

[mia_lea]

Thank you all so much. It is a privilage to talk to you and see your perspective!