The Only Thing That Really Motivates Me Is Enlightenment

[Edvard]

I feel that enlightenment is the only thing that makes sense in the end, everything else creates unecessary homeostasis and is unpleasant. I know finding life purpose is a part of self-actualization, and I have almost finished the course. I landed on physics because of my curiosity about nature and passion for truth. On my value list I have "truth" second and "peace of mind" at first. Now when I have known about enlightenment, this list fits well with what my motivations are these days:

I just feel that everything but enlightenment is secondary, and not worthy of getting up in the mornings for. Nothing else feels worthy of homeostasis and discomfort, at least not much, i.e creating a regular morning habit. My day and night cycle feels longer than 24 hrs, so once I get on track, my time for getting to sleep and waking up delays every night, until I have to be awake for more than 24 hours to feel tired enough to sleep in reasonable time again. And then I can't keep that routine. The problem is, I actually like it this way, essentially saying to myself, "if it just wasn't for that damn life purpose and becoming what I think will be self-actualized, I could sleep whenever I felt for it".

But I work well when I am awake, meditating and doing enlightenment work, which comes naturally for me. I also read physics, preparing for starting a bachelor's degree at a university in 1,5 months (but as I said, that feels secondary, although it interests me). So maybe enlightenment (peace of mind) is my life purpose? And I should try to work as little as possible (just enough to live for). Just a speculation, I mean, I think I should try to be as honest as possible, coming up with any seemingly "far-fetched" idea. Maybe I should become a Buddhist monk or something?

Any thoughts, anyone who feels sort of the same way? 

[Leo Gura]

@Edvard Enlightenment is the best life purpose there is.

Just don't confuse enlightenment with laziness. It's exactly the opposite. If enlightenment is your life purpose, you want to be the most disciplined mo-fo on the planet.

Don't forget, that monkhood is a very legit path. If you're serious about enlightenment as life purpose. You can go become a monk tomorrow, if you dare. But this is not a path for the weak-hearted, or weak-willed.

[Edvard]

@Leo Gura Yeah, that's what it seemed like (best life purpose), and that's the area I don't feel lazy at doing. Just thought that day-night rythm in this regard is irrelevant as long as I get enough sleep. I don't have motivation to change it now (because I have the idea it's not necessary).. Based on what I described (that enlightenment is what motivates me the most), I'm 21 years and my life purpose may well change, is committing to physics while doing enlightenment work a good strategy? If I'll go for physics my routines have to change drastically. I plan on discplining my sleep patterns, I have to do that to prepare for the studies if I'm going to be successful in the field, I figure. And, if I don't go for physics I have to get a job, but part time is enough.

Thanks anyway.

[Edvard]

19 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

Don't forget, that monkhood is a very legit path. If you're serious about enlightenment as life purpose. You can go become a monk tomorrow, if you dare. But this is not a path for the weak-hearted, or weak-willed.

Tomorrow? Depends on how much money I need to save. Don't have too much atm. But I'll definetely ponder this possibility.

[Joseph Maynor]

Enlightenment doesn't wipe out the utility and beauty of theory though.  Enlightenment is not the be all end all.  You need depth and breadth of wisdom and experience too.  We're apes after all.  Apes that are self-perfecting in both body and mind.

[Edvard]

8 minutes ago, Joseph Maynor said:

You need depth and breadth of wisdom and experience too

Would you think that when enlightened, though?

BTW, wisdom and knowledge also gives me a lot, and makes me feel fulfilled. The question is really what to prioritize (what should be the main life purpose).

Edited July 1, 2017 by Edvard

[Joseph Maynor]

5 minutes ago, Edvard said:

Would you think that when enlightened, though?

Yeah.  Watch this.

 

[Arkandeus]

Quote

"if it just wasn't for that damn life purpose and becoming what I think will be self-actualized, I could sleep whenever I felt for it".

I think this says a lot, maybe you're putting too much pressure on trying to become something, enlightenment is supposed to be a relaxing into that ''feeling/being'', what could possible keep you from sleeping when you feel like it if not for some construct of the mind? 

if you're trying to pinpoint a goal like ''this is my primary goal'' and ''this is my secondary goal'' you're still working within the boundaries of the mind, trying to ''be'' something, trying to be an identity, trying to be a purpose. 
nothing wrong with that of course, but as a heads-up you'll find this be a hinder

why can't one moment your enlightenment work be your life purpose, and the next moment your physics course be your life purpose? 
why be limited to one thing?
the ego does not like this because it is not solid, it needs a solid identity on which to build: ''I am the enlightened one'' ''this is my goal''

it also dissecting your life, ''this moment is more important then the other''
everything needs to be embraced, if you're doing the dishes or cleaning your room, that is your life purpose as well, but the ego does not like the sound of that, if you're taking a shit on the toilet, that is your life purpose as well,it the kind of things that make an ego scream. 
but you'll find these moments hurtful if you put words on it and try to grasp them and make an identity out of it. 
if you don't think ''I am cleaning my room'' when you are cleaning your room you will find a certain harmony,and same for everything else

the less you try to fit your life into certain boxes and boundaries, the more your ego suffers, because truth is you are only what you are right now this second, which is all that surrounds you as well, if you're just sitting in your room, then that's all you are, a dude sitting in his room. 
and at the same time it isn't because the next second you will be something else, always changing, but never more then what you are right now

 

 

Edited July 1, 2017 by Arkandeus

[starsofclay]

I felt this way after an awakening last year... I had to slowly start adding the joy of life back in as I realized that I was still going to be stuck here for the rest of my life and it was getting more and more miserable going about my daily routine when all I wanted to do was lock myself up in my quiet room and meditate. 

I have recently resigned myself to the idea that I may or may not reach enlightenment in this lifetime. I feel like this is more of something that happens in  a culmination of lifetimes, and we get too caught up trying to make it happen before we die. Even though I haven't recovered any past life memories (if this such a thing is even real), I feel like this is something that I have been working on for quite a long time. I have no problem with the fact that it may happen in my next life, or even many more after that. I'm just along for the ride. 

[Shin]

13 hours ago, Edvard said:

Tomorrow? Depends on how much money I need to save. Don't have too much atm. But I'll definetely ponder this possibility.

What money ?

Just ask to a master, if he sense that you're serious enough he won't make you pay anything.

[Edvard]

27 minutes ago, Shin said:

What money ?

Just ask to a master, if he sense that you're serious enough he won't make you pay anything.

Food for some years? Or maybe I would get that from people.

4 hours ago, starsofclay said:

I have recently resigned myself to the idea that I may or may not reach enlightenment in this lifetime. I feel like this is more of something that happens in  a culmination of lifetimes, and we get too caught up trying to make it happen before we die.

I just figure this is the only way to true happiness, getting rid of suffering and become free. I can't choose that though, when ultimately I don't have free will, couldn't have either, so unless I see the truth, life is gonna consist of a lot of suffering, no matter what I choose to do. 

I think this quote from an unknown to me, is true: "Live your life hard, and it will be easy. Live your life easy, and it will be hard". Doesn't sound pleasant.

But, then again, I put the label "hard" on things... But it's not even ultimately my fault if I don't get to see that.

Edited July 1, 2017 by Edvard

[Edvard]

I'm on a good path to truth now, having meditated a lot with several awakenings, which makes me very content these days, which is why it's beginning to get hard to see the value in other purposes, something like what @starsofclay described.

Edited July 1, 2017 by Edvard

[Edvard]

7 hours ago, Arkandeus said:

why can't one moment your enlightenment work be your life purpose, and the next moment your physics course be your life purpose? 
why be limited to one thing?
the ego does not like this because it is not solid, it needs a solid identity on which to build: ''I am the enlightened one'' ''this is my goal''

I'm thinking that life purpose is about focusing on one area (10,000 hour rule), and that whatever I choose I should try to make an impact, because I figure that's the only thing that makes sense if you're going to do anything anyway. Now I'm starting to doubt my will for that, and I'm just content with being in the present, meditating in a room.

[Leo Gura]

22 hours ago, Edvard said:

Just thought that day-night rythm in this regard is irrelevant as long as I get enough sleep.

No, they are not irrelevant.

Your body's cycles are tied with the sun and moon. Even if you are asleep, when the sun rises, your body knows it.

The most effective times to meditate are 30 mins before and after sunrise and sunset.

[Shin]

9 hours ago, Edvard said:

Food for some years? Or maybe I would get that from people.

You know that you have to work if you go to a monastery ?

They don't just meditate all day, in fact they only meditate 2 hours everyday

[Arkandeus]

12 hours ago, Edvard said:

I'm thinking that life purpose is about focusing on one area (10,000 hour rule), and that whatever I choose I should try to make an impact, because I figure that's the only thing that makes sense if you're going to do anything anyway. Now I'm starting to doubt my will for that, and I'm just content with being in the present, meditating in a room.

by society's standards this is the way on reaching a goal. 

but by enlightenment you do not need to focus on anything, just by following your natural instinct you will advance in your desires in all directions at once.

it's like shining like a pocket light versus shining like a lightbulb. 

it is pretty much impossible for the conscious mind to plan an intense advance in all desires at the same, just by following your instinct it is possible, but it will seem like very random and it will seem to take you to random places and most of the time you won't know what you were trying to achieve there until the event is already over, this is really a matter of trust into your higher self. 

you can either chose to plan your own life or you can leave it up to your higher self by following your gut feeling. 
both are fine but the path of the higher self is more intense but rewarding. 

to follow your feeling in the moment is pretty much to relinquish all control, for someone that was used to doing plans all the time it was very hard,but I can guarantee you that this path is very rewarding as well. 

this is pretty much how the present moment works, how could you be one hundred percent in the present moment while still having to make plans about later? 
the present moment is you being a hundred percent absorbed in what's happening in front of you and your higher self is making all the plans for you and guiding you by instinct

 

[Edvard]

2 hours ago, Arkandeus said:

this is pretty much how the present moment works, how could you be one hundred percent in the present moment while still having to make plans about later? 

Maybe if I just observe my thinking of the plans, without being attached with them unconsciously. But I guess that is a pretty advanced ability, and may require years of meditation practice?

2 hours ago, Arkandeus said:

but by enlightenment you do not need to focus on anything, just by following your natural instinct you will advance in your desires in all directions at once.

I see, but that is if I choose solely enlightenment work, then. I can't be successfully studying at a university if I just follow my instincts. Or if I become a monk, for that matter.

[Edvard]

6 hours ago, Shin said:

You know that you have to work if you go to a monastery ?

They don't just meditate all day, in fact they only meditate 2 hours everyday

OK, do you know what kind of work this normally is? Thought it was a lot of studying, at least.

Edited July 2, 2017 by Edvard

[Edvard]

7 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

The most effective times to meditate are 30 mins before and after sunrise and sunset.

Well, I live in Norway, so that's hard at least during mid summer and winter. My problem is that I feel like the type of person who just work and focus well at night and really bad in the morning. I just hate going to bed, and usually can't sleep if I try. I have to figure a way to make it worth it to be disciplined in the mornings, I guess, waking up the same time every day. My mind isn't working or thinking rationally at that time, though, all it wants is to go back to sleep. Plus I am then concerned about losing sleep, because then I have to get to sleep in time in the evenings, which is hard if it's true that my natural day-night cycle is more than 24 hrs. Somehow I made it in the military for 1 year (mandatory service), but it wasn't pleasant in this regard, and some weeks I lost sleep, but it is possible if I really have the right motivation. I think the main problem is discipline.

Edited July 2, 2017 by Edvard

[Shin]

1 hour ago, Edvard said:

OK, do you know what kind of work this normally is? Thought it was a lot of studying, at least.

Cooking, cleaning, gardening, secretary work, etc.