Grace's Whisper

[Ayla]

Lord

I've seen your face. Your sweet perfume. I've tasted "YOUR" truth.....melting in "MINE". 

So much joy!!!

Perfectly perfect! Amazingly completely explosive implosive all perfectness is what you really are! Both in the dark and in the light.. for as dark to exist, it needs the light to break it...

You won't be able to see that with eyes, but with HEART! 

Open! Expanding love! Pouring Love! 

Such greatness is everywhere! 

Pouring melting flowing floating Love! 

Dissolve

Allow - Let go; Allow - Let go; Allow - let go. 

 

 

[Ludwig]

@Ayla Beautiful drawing. 

[Ayla]

GOD

 

[Ayla]

Ayla ? 

Ayla is no more.

Allow / in-breath 

Let go / out-breath 

Breathing Ayla. 

something is breathing "ayla" 

Love is breathing "ayla"

No Ayla here ...

TRUTH

FREE 

 

[Ayla]

Slept like a baby in God's lap. 

 

Less and less things to be said... such grace and freedom is this.... 

Basking! Pouring love... 

Just writing all this in hope that this wave will engage with other waves, carrying them further, embracing them, breaking them free, lovingly, compassionately, allowing and letting go... ocean of love we are

 

[Ayla]

One of the most powerful satsangs I ever watched  

I love you Mooji

 

 

[Ayla]

Today i had almost no heartbeat, that's how deep i went in meditation..

It was SO PEACEFUL but also things were seen - bad dreams of people - generations of them from the beginning of times - contemplated, seen, integrated, loved! 

Pain was felt kinda like in a movie - you see a man dying in a movie it kinda scares and hurts you but still you know that it's a movie!

I prayed and prayed for a word to arise  - what came: "you are not living live you are the happening of life"

The "you do not exist" means you are just a happening - its not that you're not real .... you are kinda sorta real but just as a happening, not as a solid thing. I'd say God arising/happening  - cause there's all in all such a harmony, it can only come to the human mind as some concept of God - like a piece of puzzle, only the puzzle is not cut........air, sea, mountains, sky, sun, were like completing myself  - this is more fit than "we are all one", a bit like my drawings - I use different types of pastels, intertwining into a single drawing!

Cant see further than this second any longer!

This, what i'm going to say to you - only one month ago sounded CRAZY to me but really  - you ARE me,

Listening to devotion songs to keep me grounded Mooji is fading into me... i loved this man SO MUCH  - now... he is here with me no need to ...nothing at all... no search left. No question. PEACE!

Still, suffering is here too - you feel the killing of an ant too it's not bad not good just God

today i have seen God

"in what way different from yesterday?" -  the depth, the completeness, the lack of questions about mysteries... God is kinda like the collaboration of all there is, the harmony between all there is. that "god out there" is an illusion.

"God is void" -  that sounds negative. God is the harmony in the disharmony - human mind is so fucked up !!!!!! still essential human tool, like the fucking need we have of each other, the struggles, the pain, the love - everything is there  - all of it GOD - it is neither beautiful nor ugly it just is there - no kind of a terrain from which this is arising - it is all of it,  ALL  - all that you imagine "was", all you imagine "will be", all of it!!

When we say source - we imagine already we are the children - thus separate - which we aren't - we really are IT !

"air around you 

is me

air around me

is you"

[Ayla]

Crying happening out of COMPLETE JOY! 

The fading memory of a struggling person.... The incomplete loves... 

The drama, the hate, the suffering... illusions that are fading in the lap of God

LORD ! 

Such a beauty is created by you us me him her this that... how was this hidden for so long? Right here is where it is: in the struggle, in the pain, in the human love and hate, in the butterfly flying at the beach, in the Sun... acceptance of everything there is!

Pouring...all over pouring happening of love

 

No key, no way, no going, no searching. Just being. Breathing in human form... 

[Ayla]

"I" 

LOVING

"YOU" 

yes yes you  

[Ayla]

So much love!! So much gratitude for YOU ME US THEM ... pouring love, sharing it, caring for it and cherishing it! 

The dance of clouds.. 

[Ayla]

BIG Bubble of Love: the moment you cannot leave anyone and anything out of it, you're home!

[Ayla]

To hell and back... 

The more we advance on the path to truth the deeper the purging becomes - it has of course personal roots but it is not about yourself any longer. There's a point in the grieving where it feels like the pain goes back in time it expands to all people from all times. 

Last purging was an attack so vicious, I was witnessing a part of human construction - the illusion turning back at itself trying to kill itself. sharp, focused like a laser right towards the heart of it, body feeling electrocuted by the pain, the despair, the hopelessness and helplessness of it all. no force to fight, no will to fight... been taken on to a journey of human suffering, horror, hell... the hell through the veins of a human being. Felt like lava sticking to everything that it encounters killing it melting it.

Is this "God, why have you forsaken me?" Jesus was talking about? just words....trying to convey in human terms that can perceive a feeling. 

Waiting for death knowing that also is illusion, stuck there, letting it take me. can't fight this. won't fight it.

There's no me anywhere.. no thing is real

Still, somehow, you are not given more than you can take. Ground is shaking (literally). Earthquake snaps me out of hell back into the loving hands of Grace. 

[Ayla]

 

 

[Ayla]

 

Post number 1000

[Ayla]

Deep, profound, complete, all encompassing, unconditional, never-ending, total, beautiful, amazing, surrendered, humble, happy, joyful, expanding, infinite, perpetual, uniting, melting, dissolving love!

 

 

[Bas]

Your art is beautiful 

[Ayla]

Let's rant a bit just for the heck of it .. 

There is NO YOU!!! OKAY? Find me a you in there and present it to me  

You are breaking through the illusion that there is a thinker and doer (‘I, me’) in charge of what is going on... A "me" separate from "you" running its "own" life. Your mind has received a huge blow. Has been cornered by the realization that "oh fuck, it all is illusion" and is struggling!!! Doesn't know (holy) shit anymore!!! It is shedding the suffocating programming, that was squeezed into a tiny person. Can feel like giving birth... Destruction. Deconstruction of an illusory life you have worked so hard to create, so much energy has gone into it, so many projections and distractions!!

The realization tends to be triggered by a person, an event or a thought. How else? A flying humanoid with wings knocking at the window?  

Come back to that you that is seeing all this with no judgement. Keep going back to it, no matter what Maya throws at you. 

This me here Is. This me here is watching it all coming and going. 

[Ayla]

[Ludwig]

That's pretty cool art. 

[Ayla]

@Ludwig

 Wish the theme was bit more uplifting