Exploiting People To Grow Yourself

[RossE]

This is an old video from Leo, so he may not think it's one of his best! I disagree however. This is one of Leo's best videos.

I keep revisiting it every few months just to keep myself grounded and always aware of my own faults. As you grow on this journey, you will almost encounter somebody everywhere you go that is breaking the habits you use and the theory you know and have applied. You will actually first hand see how people are destroying their lives. It's incredible. 

The message of this video is to continually turn back inward when you see people like this. Instead of trying to change them, you realise this is like trying to make concrete float, and use their behaviour to grow yourself.

If you can start to pick up on all of the bad habits and patterns people around you have, you will have MANY opportunities to introspect. You won't even need to independently determine your own flaws, this technique provides you will almost all of them! You are probably still behaving like these people to an extent unless you're a PD God. 

Go check out the video, it's extremely powerful. And I thank you for it @Leo Gura 

[Truth]

Agreed its a really good video this video has really good correlations with this idea of "Radically Turning Inward" that Leo constantly stresses. All your answers to your problems are within you, including your happiness. Its all found, fixed and cultivated from the inside out. An amazing principle that I haven't been fully appreciating until just recently. 

[RossE]

Your appreciation of it will just keep growing and growing  They very much are. You creative your own reality.

[phoenix666]

I agree, it is one of the most practical tools out there. It helped me a lot. When I first watched it, I immediately felt a strong improvement because I was turning inside more than usual. (and it helped to stop some bickering and criticizing I had going on with my parents). But of course, we tend to forget higher consciousness behaviors as soon as we're sucked back into work/society/friends/college. 

thanks for reminding me. I will apply it to my daily life again  

[phoenix666]

@RossE i just stumbled on this video and it immediately made me think about your post

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lqr98O8QT3M

[RossE]

@phoenix666 That's a very cool video, thanks! So intense presence is the order of the day. 

I find that I actually fall into meditation a lot when I'm around people arguing or angry, agitated people. I notice thoughts/emotions/sensations which invite me to get involved with that negativity, and am able to observe and watch them drift away. Something to practice and continue to practice.

[phoenix666]

@RossE wow, so you're already doing that? wonderful that you're at that point! I am not able to stay aware when I interact with arguing/angry/agitated people in most cases. I usually get right sucked in my lower self, in my thoughts and emotions. and it makes me suffer a lot because I then feel myself also suffering with and for the other person. 

I guess I just have to practice that. how do you do that? just becoming the observer of you thoughts as in regular meditation? and how can you talk to people when you do that? don't you have to 'step into your thoughts' in order to form a sentence or so? 

[Arkandeus]

57 minutes ago, phoenix666 said:

@RossE wow, so you're already doing that? wonderful that you're at that point! I am not able to stay aware when I interact with arguing/angry/agitated people in most cases. I usually get right sucked in my lower self, in my thoughts and emotions. and it makes me suffer a lot because I then feel myself also suffering with and for the other person. 

I guess I just have to practice that. how do you do that? just becoming the observer of you thoughts as in regular meditation? and how can you talk to people when you do that? don't you have to 'step into your thoughts' in order to form a sentence or so? 

keep up the meditation practice every day,no matter how short, it's literally training to stay conscious during such moments

[RossE]

@phoenix666 Yeah I do it, but don't get me wrong, I'm not a master at it by any means! I've got a long way to go. 

I think it's just from practising meditation a lot, I'm becoming more attuned to my thoughts and emotions with time. It's a natural consequence. Shinzen Young likes to use the analogy of driving a car: at first you can only drive a car on empty road, very slowly, with somebody instructing you, and it involves a lot of concentration and effort. But after years of driving you can drive for hours on end, at high speed, on busy roads, while talking and thinking about other things, with very little effort. The same goes for mindfulness. Eventually it becomes second nature. I guess I'm maybe leaving the empty road at this moment!! How long have you practised meditation?

At the moment I only use it during times where there's negative emotions or words being exchanged, and use those moments to prepare the words I will say, but I speak less so that I don't fuel the fire. If it's general conversation I'm usually not too mindful unless there's judgements or gossip arising within me or through the words of other people, and I will slip into mindfulness quite a lot.  The only way to truly know is to get there yourself! 

[S33K3R]

@RossE That is awesome! I never saw Leo's video about this. I recently started using this technique. I have a lot of unconscious friends and they can be neurotic. I love them but I used to have a very hard time being around them for fear of the negative energies. I have friends that get drunk and argue in front of people, others do a cocktail of drugs and act crazy, everyone I know drinks lol these are my boyfriends friends. I had to find a way to be around them haha 

Once I adopted the fuck it attitude that was really when this method inserted itself into my social interactions naturally. Because instead of worrying about what was happening, the noise of the negativity became something to play with. So now I am not afraid to socialize anymore because I naturally can deal with any personality type from what I have seen so far  I am in the testing phase to see if anything can break this method. I love hanging out now because of this nerdy thing lol 

I am so happy to see someone else write about it and now that I know Leo has this video I need to watch it! Thanks!

 

 

[hinawashi]

The whole deal about exploiting people is just one application of being mindful, which boils down to controlling your response to people, in this case. But you can exploit not just people, but things, events, and situations. You can exploit just about anything and everything you encounter in your life. It's actually quite difficult because you have to keep on questioning not just your surroundings but your own thoughts and feelings towards everything, which is what being mindful is all about.

Leo makes really good videos on applications. Short but to the point.

[phoenix666]

@RossE I really like the car analogy. Yeah, sounds like you can try driving on busy roads. I'll keep practicing on the empty one for a while

I've been mediating for two years now, varying from 15 minutes to 1 hour a day. I've now committed to more practice the last few weeks because it's been really helping me a lot. So I am very curious to experience some of the things people speak about on the forum.