How To More Social In Forums?

[Anirban657]

Please don't give me the cliché answers like "Just be yourself" or "Be frank" . I am an introvert and in the real world I find it hard to be around large groups of people. But I realise I am also an introvert in the internet. I mean my fingers swet when I am typing the words and then I start thinking about what others would think. I may be a "internet introvert". 

Please give me some self help advice.

[egoeimai]

And why change ? Does it bother you? 

[Dan Arnautu]

@Anirban657 Well, your problem doesn't seem to be being an introvert. The root problem seems to be a fear of being judged or not being good enough.

Do some introspection and look up some of Leo's videos related to this topic. He has one on communication skills I remember. Also, the one on uncovering your childhood vows may help too.

[Veggies]

Listen, @Anirban657, you really don't need to be. "How to be more social in forums" is not a problem at all.

 

The problem you face is fear. How to handle fear, well Leo for instance has some videos on that.

[HikiNEET]

Don't expect anything of what you say, just share.

[sweater]

On 6/12/2017 at 5:01 AM, Anirban657 said:

Please give me some self help advice.

Taking pointless walks outside everyday could help.

[Visitor]

Being an introvert can be a blessing. While you pause to respond, it will give you time to reflect on what is true. Once you discover what is true, then respond truthfully.

[Spiral]

@Anirban657 Do you mean more social as in sending pm's or responding to/creating topics? Either way remember that you are anonymous, people generally don't care enough to judge you, because they don't need to invest in you. I don't want to say that people are careless, but there are way to many people on forums to invest in them all.

[S33K3R]

@Anirban657 I used to feel that when interacting.

 

Think of it this way. Your self perception can be viewed only one way at a time the ways are from your POV, it can be from others POV, or it can be your opinion of others POV. Usually when people are in this state they are viewing themselves through their own judgmental eyes how you believe others see you. 

This is a very disruptive energetic pattern because it is so confusing internally and is almost impossible to maintain with balance. 

 

So in essence this is not who you are. You are allowing fear to direct your energies and if I was you I would adopt a "fuck it" attitude for a short while to see if this helps. Care not about what a single other person thinks, feels, or does unless it directly impacts you. I did this for myself years ago and haven't really looked back. 

 

You should research this neuron in our brains called "mirror neurons" these neurons are the cause for your concern about others opinions of you. This is just an evolutionary trait to keep humans in groups and to help us cooperate without all hell breaking loose. Saying fuck it tells this neuron to effectively shove it. Believe me when I say it feels good  

[Loreena]

How to be a little more dysfunctional??  Therein lies the key. 

[Anirban657]

@Loreena How? Why do you think so?

[krazzer]

@Anirban657 I have struggled with social anxiety for years. Didn't matter where, in real life or on forums.

This video, and it's exercises helped me tremendously:

 

Another thing that might help, but that's more long term, is doing enlightenment exercises. If you realize you are not your body, you won't care about what anyone thinks, because you are them.