Food For Thought

[Lou7]

Recently when I reflect on 'how are things overall' my thoughts are getting weirder and weirder, for example I think about how self-actualization is actually a bad thing because people think that you are better than them and are less likely to talk to you, also in the same manner reverse situation - that by not trying too much; eating unhealthy food, watching comedies and brainless stuff you're getting more available to people because they don't feel intimidated by your discipline.

I want to hear your outside of the box thinking and how are you coping with this stuff because sometimes I take them seriously and get really confused.

[Natasha]

@Lou7 When you're self-actualized, you don't mind what other people think of you and are free from opinions of others. You are here to live your life, not seek approval of anyone 

[KellyJoe]

I have thought about this as well.  

I have actually stopped myself for a long time of self actualizing or just living "better" because I never wanted to be better than other people.  My family doesn't live that well.  Everything that you said plus more. They don't try in life at all.  Government takes care of them.  They eat badly to the point of teeth falling out and kidney stones.  Alcohol, drugs, and I can keep going. 

Because of this, I didn't try as much as I wanted to because I didn't want to be "better than them" but then I felt bad when I was with my husband's family who functioned well in this society because I thought they were better than me.  

After meditation, I realized all of this thought is in me. It's not true.  The ego compares.  Comparison doesn't really exist. 

Osho says, "If you are egoistic you are bound to compare yourself with others. The ego cannot exist without comparison, hence if you really want to drop the ego, drop comparing. "

It took some time but I started to eat better, and exercise better, but I just don't talk about it with others.  I just do it.  I don't think I'm better but I know I feel damn good living like this.   Like @Natasha said, you are here to live your life.  

If you think about the comparison too much, the only person you are stopping is yourself.  And if you want to self actualize, you will be surprised how many people you affect in a positive way.  

[Mastral]

3 hours ago, Lou7 said:

that by not trying too much; eating unhealthy food, watching comedies and brainless stuff you're getting more available to people because they don't feel intimidated by your discipline.

I wouldn't compromise what you do for yourself in order to have more people resonate with you. Maybe test the water first? I.e. bring up healthy eating when talking to person A, then next time mention meditation/contemplation then exercise and so on. One of these things you may both share. If you have nothing in common then proceed as appropriate given the situation.

[Leo Gura]

@Lou7 Why do you want the approval of mindless chimps?

[SOUL]

How would anybody know what you are doing from just by looking at you? Since someone can't tell just from appearances it must be that you're talking about it to others. Maybe have the mindset that it's satisfying enough in doing it without having to tell anybody and you wouldn't have to deal with any judgment or attitude from others not that it should bother you anyway.

 

[Lou7]

No, I don't talk about it (I do only with very few like-minded people) but I feel like it shows in being more silent and withdrawn.

[SOUL]

So you you are saying that you are silent and withdrawn but you are wondering why people aren't talking to you more? It kind of seems like you are reading more into the situation then really is there.  Just let it go and be at peace.

[Lou7]

Also another question (maybe it was spoken about somewhere, I dunno) on what basis are we humans making decisions? Few years back I used to live going from 1 thing I like to another, from fun to curiosity and so on, choosing only easy and pleasureable things. Now I started to notice that I do the exact opposite I choose the hard things (diet, workouts, studying etc.), but what happens when the 'hard' things come easy to me? How can I challenge myself - look at myself and see what needs improving or grind the mentioned above good stuff (being healthy, taking care of mind and body)?

[phoenix666]

Self actualizing can make you very lonely I guess. Leo recently shot a video about this. I lately feel a very strong urge to isolate myself. I've always needed a lot of 'alone-time', but lately it's reaching a whole other level. Even my parents started to ask me why I spend so much time by myself. But they see that I am quite satisfied with my life, so they actually don't worry. they're just curious I guess. 

Don't let losing some friends stop you from keeping up the good work! It probably means that you're making a lot of progress