Need Help Explaining This...

[Sarah Marie]

I am going to ask this question with the risk of sounding crazy, but if anyone can help explain this I'd be someone in here.

 

For a long time now I have these "episodes" or I call them "experiences" because they are so humbling and honestly put things into perspective for me. 

 

I am going to do my best to describe what happens. I will randomly feel like I am not human. It feels like I am scattered energy and I'm just observing. I have no feelings, like I can look down at my son and see him vibrating like little  atoms/energy making him up;I just recognize him as that, energy. It happens very quickly it feels like I am just "there". I don't choose when this happens and when I try to force it it doesn't work. It feels like I am dissociating (not consciously)  myself from my body, but I am still so aware. It almost feels like I am observing from an elevated level but I have no opinions.

 

It completely freaks me out when I "come back" because I don't mean to do it. 

 

I went and got a picture of my aura taken and the lady who did it said she must have snapped the picture wrong because she's never seen the perfect red orb around someone's head. We took it a second time and it was a perfect purple circle above my head. My entire family got theirs done and it looked rainbows around them. She told me that this means I am able to "leave" and visit "another realm". I don't know about that, I am a medium and I do help people connect but it's nothing crazy like that. It's just like a slideshow in my mind and that's how I connect two people on different realms. 

 

Can anyone help explain this? There are so many "out there" things that have happened in my life I feel like I'm open minded about anything, but this freaks me out because I feel like I'm crazy. 

 

 

 

 

[Ella90]

Enlightenment? Maybe you should direct this question to the forum on the topic of enlightenment and meditation.

[Sarah Marie]

Just now, Ella90 said:

Enlightenment? Maybe you should direct this question to the forum on the topic of enlightenment and meditation.

I don't think this is enlightenment, I don't even fully understand what enlightenment means so I'm not sure that'd be it. That is something I plan on working towards in the future but right now I am still trying to figure out what my ego is. LOL. 

[Ayla]

@Sarah_Flagg,

You know very well that you are not crazy

Having played with these things all my life, my conclusion now at this point, is that we have no way of understanding these things AND the fact that nobody can really explain them, is a sign for me that there's no need to

As you say, it is very humbling, sometimes scary, sometimes so beautiful that we just can't seem to let in all that joy. 

Does it matter what it is? Why it is like that? 

I enjoy to the fullest my experiences. I know they are mine, that nobody can take them away, that they happen for a reason which I cannot comprehend... and don't let mind try to trick me into some understanding that might or might not be accurate. 

[Sarah Marie]

1 minute ago, Ayla said:

@Sarah_Flagg,

You know very well that you are not crazy

Having played with these things all my life, my conclusion now at this point, is that we have no way of understanding these things AND the fact that nobody can really explain them, is a sign for me that there's no need to

As you say, it is very humbling, sometimes scary, sometimes so beautiful that we just can't seem to let in all that joy. 

Does it matter what it is? Why it is like that? 

I enjoy to the fullest my experiences. I know they are mine, that nobody can take them away, that they happen for a reason which I cannot comprehend... and don't let mind try to trick me into some understanding that might or might not be accurate. 

I try so hard to have this mind state but I swear it runs in my blood to search deeper. If I didn't search for answers I would have never known I could help connect people to another realm. 

Maybe that is what's best, to leave it. But it terrifies me, what if it happens while I'm driving! 

[abrakamowse]

I think the best option for you @Sarah_Flagg is try to focus on your senses, not so much on your mind or having those kind of experiences.

I know because I did it too, I had some weird experiences and I took very bad decisions because of them. IMO they are mind tricks, nothing important.

Focus on the now.

 

[Ayla]

Just now, Sarah_Flagg said:

But it terrifies me, what if it happens while I'm driving! 

It will not. 

Here's how I see this: For me, there's just two "forces" in this Universe -* : LOVE and FEAR. Love is real. Fear is not. Anytime you do not feel Love... that's your cue right there that that's an illusion  

 

* trying my best to put concepts into what I want to express here... so enlightenment "specialists" (LOL) please bare with me

 

[abrakamowse]

I totally agree with @Ayla  , IMO they are illusions too and we don't have to play with them. 

My two cents.

You can read about my experience here if you want:

 

[Sarah Marie]

First, thanks for not suggesting I need to go see my therapist like my family does, LOL. 

Second, thank you for your responses. I often feel like something is wrong with me because I look at my husband and those around me who seem to literally have nothing going on like this. Not even a little bit.

 

[Ayla]

1 minute ago, Sarah_Flagg said:

First, thanks for not suggesting I need to go see my therapist like my family does, LOL. 

I wouldn't do that to you LOL 

1 minute ago, Sarah_Flagg said:

I often feel like something is wrong with me because I look at my husband and those around me who seem to literally have nothing going on like this. Not even a little bit.

It is not unusual for a person like you to have what I call "an anchor" into this world. Someone very "solid" and adapted to life here, to keep you from going AWOL  

[abrakamowse]

In our search is easy @Sarah_Flagg to fall into tricks of the mind. I found out that the best thing to do is to "do nothing". Lol...

Sometimes we wish so much to have an "experience" which will confirm our belief that our minds give us that. 
Better be safe and go step by step...

[Chaitali M]

Similar things r happening to me..too,when i look my self in the mirror(sometimes not all the times) i feel like im seeing through my self....the background and my reflection merges to become one aand im simply the observer i dont see myself as myself aanymore...this stays for some secs...n than all comesback to normal...it started happening to me when i started taking spirituality and enlightment seriously...maybe my practise of being in the moment...has led to such experiences...

[Sarah Marie]

@abrakamowse I have not really actively "wanted" any of this really. I often times actually find myself wanting to be like my husband who is totally content working 9-5, watching TV, etc. Haha, it seems a lot easier. But it feels like its in my blood like I said, to question and figure out things. My brain often wants something scientific, so learning about most of this takes work for me. I feel like I am open to anything, but then I need to understand it. Which is the part that is looking like I need to just let it *be*.

 

Thanks again everyone.

[A way to Actualize]

22 minutes ago, Sarah_Flagg said:

I am going to ask this question with the risk of sounding crazy, but if anyone can help explain this I'd be someone in here.

 

For a long time now I have these "episodes" or I call them "experiences" because they are so humbling and honestly put things into perspective for me. 

 

I am going to do my best to describe what happens. I will randomly feel like I am not human. It feels like I am scattered energy and I'm just observing. I have no feelings, like I can look down at my son and see him vibrating like little  atoms/energy making him up;I just recognize him as that, energy. It happens very quickly it feels like I am just "there". I don't choose when this happens and when I try to force it it doesn't work. It feels like I am dissociating (not consciously)  myself from my body, but I am still so aware. It almost feels like I am observing from an elevated level but I have no opinions.

 

It completely freaks me out when I "come back" because I don't mean to do it. 

 

I went and got a picture of my aura taken and the lady who did it said she must have snapped the picture wrong because she's never seen the perfect red orb around someone's head. We took it a second time and it was a perfect purple circle above my head. My entire family got theirs done and it looked rainbows around them. She told me that this means I am able to "leave" and visit "another realm". I don't know about that, I am a medium and I do help people connect but it's nothing crazy like that. It's just like a slideshow in my mind and that's how I connect two people on different realms. 

 

Can anyone help explain this? There are so many "out there" things that have happened in my life I feel like I'm open minded about anything, but this freaks me out because I feel like I'm crazy. 

 

 

 

 

It does not sound weird to me at all. You indeed had that experience. Visit another realm could mean astral travelling with ease? 

Contrary to some others, I would say there is some benefit to to powers realm in spirituality, (not for everyone at this moment). I never astral travelled myself. But in essence you leave your body to a space where you can experience everything you want to. Also for every answer to every question you can experience. For example what the orb around your head means. 

Before many people are going to say that it is bs, distracting etc. Do not mind this post. This is not meant to agree or disagree with. It is just giving a perspective for Sarah.

 

[Mia]

I`ve never had any experience like that although I`d actually like to. In one of his videos Leo tells about one of his meditation-experiences that probably, as to the description, was something similar to yours. We are all atoms and energy, being part of one whole entity, so it seems to me like you are somehow approaching this insight through your experiences. Have you noticed any regularity? When does it happen usually?

[Sarah Marie]

@Mia I haven't noticed any regularity at all. This last time it happened I was looking at a house my parents are considering buying. My husband was snapping his fingers at me asking if "anyone was in there".  

[Mia]

Hm...:) I guess it might feel uncomfortable if you feel that you loose control, but to me it seems like enlightenment (even though unconscious), as if e you have a connection to the unknown part of reality, probably "perceiving energy directly as it flows through the universe" (quote from Castaneda).

[Leo Gura]

1 hour ago, Sarah_Flagg said:

I will randomly feel like I am not human. It feels like I am scattered energy and I'm just observing. I have no feelings, like I can look down at my son and see him vibrating like little  atoms/energy making him up;I just recognize him as that, energy. It happens very quickly it feels like I am just "there".

Hehehe...

That's because YOU ARE NOT HUMAN!

That you are human is just a silly belief you've been told from birth. It has no basis in reality.

What you're experiencing is Spirit, AKA consciousness, AKA the True Self << Which is what you actually are.

You are a formless, empty, infinite field of awareness which is omnipresent. Sounds kinda like God, huh? Well, that's exactly right. That's what you are. This experience scares the shit out the ego of course.

I recommend you start doing self-inquiry, if you aren't already. It will gradually clarify these experiences for you. The problem right now is that you're having these experiences but your mind is unprepared to process them or recognize them for what they are.

Don't get lost in all that aura business. You need to sit down and deconstruct this illusory entity called "Sarah". Sarah is a lie. And she's starting to crumble. Don't bother trying to glue here back together. Help hasten the process instead.

[abrakamowse]

Good to know, what will we do without @Leo Gura ??? I have no clue about what kind of experience is real or not.

:-P

[Nick]

Thank you for this post now I know better. Once when I was meditating I've had an experience where I opened my eyes and looked down at my hands and percieved it not as "my hands" but just as part of the universe. It happened unintentionally. 

I thought it was no big deal