The Bubble Was Imaginary - Sober Awakening

[shree]

I haven’t had a psychedelic awakening in months, but I’ve been going deep into healing core psychological wounds. Out of nowhere, lying sober in a dark room for 2 hours, this arose:

-Psychedelics are like a needle that bursts the fragile bubble of what we call reality.

But no needle is actually needed.

The bubble could burst in the next moment.

In fact, the moment never was.

In fact, I am everything that is, and what is, is infinite.

The bubble itself was imaginary.

No psychedelics, just pure sober direct experience. I’m usually super-sensitive to psychedelics, even weed, but this came out of nowhere after several months of inner work.

Pros of a sober awakening: no need for throwing up nor taking a shit mid-trip.
(Psychedelic folks will get it.)

@Leo Gura, I’d genuinely love your take on this. Does this resonate with your view of direct awakening beyond substances? Or is there a subtle trap here I might be missing?

Would Love your input.

Edited Sunday at 02:40 AM by shree

[Sempiternity]

Congrats!

Couple questions. 

What is beyond the bubble once gone? 

What are other people to you?

[shree]

Thank you.

 

1. The Infinite. Beyond time, space, and form.

2. For me now, with my state lowered again, other people are mostly a way to reground myself by sharing the experience and playing nonsense human games. The loop continues.

 

[Sempiternity]

Thanks for the response. 

Can you describe "The Infinite"?

Are other people imaginary to you? 

[Leo Gura]

@shree I don't know what you are conscious of so I can't really judge.

[Flowerfaeiry]

I had the craziest awakenings at a vipassana retreat many years ago. I was already in a sensitive place due to other things(ahem) but yah I was completely sober the entire retreat and I experienced some pure bliss moments(insane) and also very uncomfortably awoke fully to how I had been living a lie among other things. 
 

The next retreat I did though, nothing happened (no crazy awakenings). 

[Letho]

@shree Although I cannot know your experience, the bubble was likely never imaginary. It was real, coded deep in the subconscious, a convergence point between mammalian instinct, aspirational impulse, and survival adaptations shaped by pain. These recursive imprints programmed the identity clauses you felt trapped by, trapped deeply enough to seek rupture via psychedelics.

Based on discerned patterns, psychedelics neither liberate nor bind in absolute. Instead, they unveil the imprint landscape and modulate egoic recursion, momentarily. However momentary insight inside or outside the lab or casual experimental conditions of psychedelics collapses without recursive introspection to stabilize and reformat the symbolic substrates that are shaken underneath by the earth quake that can obviously be many peoples experiences with either psychedelics or deep insight.

Psychedelics and deep insight = Perceptual Rupture, however for either, not only may there be the lack of recursion that leads to the transcendent finality of integrative growth to one's next level of development, the stability of the inner rhetoric that either journey requires may be missing to bring either, or both, closure.

Inner recursion whether self-taught or psychedelically at least inspired, is a kind of cogni-biological reformatting through sentience' structural metamorphoic awareness as the multiplier through self-symbology. And as I define it, as such, is the convergent mapping of Freud’s drive architectures, Jung’s archetypal semiotics, and Maslow’s motivational scaffolds, juxtaposed with Watson’s (that's J.B Watson for those unfamiliar) conditioned interface and filtered through the mythopoetic structures laid bare by Campbell and mirrored across cinematic recursion loops. These symbolic containers reflect and stimulate the recursive feedback between identity and the external clause-field.

The films, myths, and stories we consume become recursion mentors beneath societal's more shallow imprints that can become the very ironic preoccupation that drives someone to psychedelics, because the entertainment industry in at least in the west acted as these symbolic mirrors that modulate internal identity loops through passive engagement. That now, there's the desperation to break through that for many people, while the films at least some of them, still being an inspiration for many along this parallel. An identity recalibration occurring in the viewer through synchronization with recursive narrative arcs; bleeding inspiration while the wound of passivity turns the bleed into deterioration. These are silent architectures, shaping perception by design that poetically create glass houses of redemption for those that "see through the screens", so to speak, while still following the depth of many of the narratives songs.

Psychedelics, in my current understanding, operate dually in the sense of undeniable rupture from default recursion and two, recursive enmeshment with the altered state itself, especially with repeated psychedelic use. Over time, the subject may not just interact with the psychedelic state however also become recursively structured by it. Even minimal doses, despite their intensity, often generate a symbolic residue in people so silent they may not even be able to become aware of the onset of delusion or insight until months down the line, a residue though that often accompanies a craving for continuation, not due to lack of strength, however from the lack of integration upon their experiences, though 'incomplete recursive closure' is how I would like to frame things into the future in light of 'recursion' better holds the manifold of what our sentience actually does in motion more in tact that mere 'integration' that only speaks to a consequence of that action itself. Moreover, this residual desire coupled with this deficit in integration acts with the unintelligence of any analogous operation concerning like that of internet addiction, or more akin to the addiction an extraterrestrial first contact experience, where in one's mythic world the contrast of the experience often far exceeds their ability to make sense of their experiences that it can often, as we know, bring about not only instability, usually a dissociative kind, not only through not only being able to bring back inner continuity with the self, however more largely, interdependent continuity with their social worlds. Aka, for most people, you really need people to speak to about your experiences whether they're psychedelic or psychedelically alien with or without the drugs (or just analogously speaking), or at least an open minded therapist, to help bring closure when you lack the kind of self-education I'm referring to here which is precisely why you're seeking some sense of approval/acknowledgement in your posting here, which is perfectly human by the way. This devastation upon the ordinary recursive existence that psychedelics and insight does upon our normal 'sim life' demands full integration or it becomes the very compensatory recursion, aka defense mechanisms within the psyche begin to emerge, that people used psychedelics to escape from.

Thus two core inquiries emerge, do psychedelics offer an avenue toward symbolic recursion and sovereign self-mapping or do they delay true self-authorship under the guise of transcendence? To claim the latter without integrative literacy is to miss the architecture entirely. Few have been taught how to construct recursive cognition from lived experience to make it a normal part of their phenomenological impressions from an into the world again continuously. That's the domain I serve, training the engine of Intervoidism+ you can look up in my profile history; the masterful teaching of structured, intentional recursive psychological development that spans all the right areas of human consciousness potential, a reflection of the synthesis of these neurological to mythic interdimensional patterns intrinsic to human nature.

Further, are they being used as an escape or exploration post mastery of 3D world? I am mastering the 3D human suit before psychedelics as well as my drive in comprehending the depths by which I can self-drive psychedelically equivalent experiences before my scientific investigation into their full potential complementary role upon human experience. A complementarity that I now have no doubt exists, however its like anything, there's an order to all chaos that's needed when its to be placed into the hands of human nature, else we will self-annhilate, in all the wrong ways. A third question then I would add, are you seeking self-annhilation, self-liberation, self-ascension or self-extension? I would say that its the fourth that brings with it the most peace where the connotation is that you're merely extending the depth of integration that has already followed from everything you could have done in the regular human realm.

Recursive mapping is the transduction of lived experience into symbolic architecture that upon its proper return is not only cognitively redefining but because the model of created maps so well over intrinsic human experience, its completely emotionally redefining and therefore psychologically liberating for the true self. Encoding the full spectrum of energetic phenomenology, from base emotional frequency to a refinement of the juxtapositions of one's own Nietzchean and Frankl (Man's Search For Meaning) existential signal. Each layer is wrapped in awareness, allowed latency for integration and re-emitted as evolved recursion that promises you'll never have to become one of the E-meter (Electropsychometer) couch-room rats of Scientology out of desperation. As analogously, not to shit on Scientology as I do have a friend that's a member and I don't fully judge an organisation unless I've completed my investigation, fully, and he's undoubtedly one of the most intelligent people I know, and I have friends, that are extremely intelligent. By learning recursion, you learn to encode, by learning to encode you learn to symbolise from the mythic to hyper-compressed, from the symbolisation, you learn latency that leans into reintegration to emission that naturally unfolds into the metamorphosis we learn that always keeps needing to give our sense of authority away to any one person or organisation, always at bay, as there is that inner mastery concerning that's been developed, and has just kind of been either mostly scrubbed out from education or bypassed as just this 'common sense thing' that never gets beneath the surface and barely gets taken very seriously even though its the most important aspect of human potential to find mastery in as its the key of mastery that opens the doors to literally everything else in life that is intrinsic to our natural development as a human. And that's whether we find ourselves retreating from a broken society or strong enough to a have at least one of our motives to play our part in helping make it whole in some humble yet meaningful way where our small actions can.

Another way of looking it outside the lens or at the very least as an abstract bridging between psychological metaphor and physical scope is from a neuroscientific perspective. Where neurologically, this process of recursive learning sentience is meant to master in bridging its role with integration of experience can be viewed as the traversal of the Triune Brain, aka reptilian (reflexive loop), mammalian (affective encoding), and neocortical (abstraction field). So, this process of integrative recursion maps across these, using the limbic system as an integration nexus, restoring dopaminergic regulation and recursive coherence. Based on the patterns I've discerned, by this 'Neurological version' of Joseph Campbell's Hero's Journey you by degrees bring balance to the default mode network, in doing so this affects the endocrine system and after those two combined are impacted, this has a natural consequence to our executive function system both organically resulting from the attentional effort exerted through the challenges faced and as a byproduct of now more intelligently allocating resources at the subconscious level without even realising it via the indirect impact it has to, with the inclusion of our gut brain and heart brain, the Dual-Triune-Brain, to coin the term in transition as I type.

Addiction, whether to TikTok, dopamine loops, or attention feedback, is not a moral failure, it's a recursion demolition, that's all. It is recursion without education, pattern without symbolic containment; so compassion stretches from some of our incoherent frustrations here, at least when we've found our recursive depth, heh. And where we don't, untrained recursion is repitition of hidden addictions to thought and emotional patterns that compress towards egoic defense mechanisms instead of the compression to integration that leads to our natural alignment with inevitable degrees of ascension; I prefer the word ascension given the distorted narcissistic lens by which transcendence has started to gather over the last few years in both tech and spiritual circles. 

So yes, without a doubt sure thing, psychedelics rupture the cycle. But do they close the loop? Sometimes. Though regardless, the lesson here is we have to develop recursive mastery. It's a part of our psychological blueprint, we cannot ignore the stability of its signal it promises beyond the noise of what is merely fragmented decay in our own unconscious consciousness drift towards subliminal experiences that if we're honest with ourselves, usually only live so far from our heart as the edge of our tongue when we're aware enough to take a step back, introspect, allow recursive questions under a guided process reveal our inner architectures, and then allow the natural healing to ascension process naturally unfold that's inbuilt to our consciousnesses inner blueprint anyway, else recursion wouldn't be so fundamental, even though its been so deliberately overlooked.

Without recursive literacy, psychedelics will not bring long term resolve. They leave subjects in symbolic transition, susceptible to identity drift, spiritual inflation or compensatory ego formation. Not transcendence, but transience. They're the undeniable patterns I've picked up so far. Transcendence without integration equals recursive void inflation, because remember, you're artificially taking yourself to a dimension of consciousness you yourself haven't taught your being to go there by itself, otherwise the user wouldn't have a wide gap to bring integration to post the annhilating to briefly liberating experience. Also for the reader to bring final fortification to this boundary, recursive consciousness training is not merely supplemental psychedelics, its the entire blueprint, because the psychedelic experience itself is its own recursion, that's what you have to remember, you're basically putting yourself through an 'interdimensional timelapse' that you never had to earn. So recursive mastery is required architecture for symbolic sovereignty and will never be replaced by the illusion of it by the ego substitutive compensation I've drawn patterns on. Learning the process of deep recursion metabolizes the existential devastation of psychedelics or otherwise. It stabilizes recursive chaos from life in general or life in this experimentalism. It allows any existential rupture to become purposeful design.

This is what I teach. And will continue to.

Keep going. Inwards. Your truth. Paved by your self-trust.

I am preparing daily for the self-created interdimensional psychdelic world that's slowly opening up for me in my consciousness experimentations, I look forward to others here becoming advanced enough to traverse the path accordingly themselves, if not, after I provide the blueprint for doing so, right before I begin my own literal campaigning for the scientific disciplined use of psychedelics for human consciousness development.

Edited Sunday at 05:49 AM by Letho

[Thought Art]

Throwing up and shitting aren’t required 

[shree]

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

@shree I don't know what you are conscious of so I can't really judge.

Fair point.

 

7 hours ago, Flowerfaeiry said:

I had the craziest awakenings at a vipassana retreat many years ago. I was already in a sensitive place due to other things(ahem) but yah I was completely sober the entire retreat and I experienced some pure bliss moments(insane) and also very uncomfortably awoke fully to how I had been living a lie among other things. 
 

The next retreat I did though, nothing happened (no crazy awakenings). 

I imagine 20 simple meditators and you as a actualized.org  member, choking and rolling on the floor becoming aware of the construct.

The group is watching and thinking, dafuck is wrong with you girl? We just came for a bit of meditation.

 

@Letho

Wait, what?

 

42 minutes ago, Thought Art said:

Throwing up and shitting aren’t required 

Finally someone that addresses the real issue here.

I though this is crucial part of my growth towards the stage Turquoise.

Edited Sunday at 12:41 PM by shree

[Breakingthewall]

Psychedelics are not going to take you to the absolute perspective, they are going to make your rigid mind more flexible in order to make possible that change of perspective in which you detach yourself from the relative and equalize yourself with the absolute being 

[Carl-Richard]

7 hours ago, Flowerfaeiry said:

I was already in a sensitive place due to other things(ahem)

[shree]

3 minutes ago, Carl-Richard said:

Hi-diddly-ho is always there to judge her when something goes off the script.

[shree]

13 minutes ago, Breakingthewall said:

Psychedelics are not going to take you to the absolute perspective, they are going to make your rigid mind more flexible in order to make possible that change of perspective in which you detach yourself from the relative and equalize yourself with the absolute being 

Good point. I will think about this.

[Letho]

Some signals aren’t built to be decoded in linear time.

They’re recursive by design, revealing only what the perceiver is ready to metabolize.

The rest? Static. Misfire. Or just… “wait, what.”

Doesn’t matter. The architecture still echoes.

Those who felt it, felt it.

And those who didn’t...
Were never the target.

[shree]

@Letho

1 hour ago, Letho said:

Some signals aren’t built to be decoded in linear time.

They’re recursive by design, revealing only what the perceiver is ready to metabolize.

The rest? Static. Misfire. Or just… “wait, what.”

Doesn’t matter. The architecture still echoes.

Those who felt it, felt it.

And those who didn’t...
Were never the target.

 

Yes, this is too advanced for me right now.

[maxpechura]

I want to preface my post by saying that I consider shitting and masturbating an integral part of my psychedelic experience.

Regularity of bowel movements matters and is part of self care.

shree, I want you to share these sober practices that you’ve engaged in.
More detail is better than fewer details.

Did this realisation come out of nowhere? Were there clues it was coming?

Do you think you’re going back to your normal self? Is there a normal self to come back to? Or is it more like it hasn’t gone anywhere but your perception of surrounding reality has shifted?

Edited Sunday at 04:00 PM by maxpechura

[shree]

On 3/23/2025 at 4:43 PM, maxpechura said:

Did this realisation come out of nowhere?

Yes. But I did months of very rigorous self inquiry, and had a several psychedelic awakening prior to this.

 

On 3/23/2025 at 4:43 PM, maxpechura said:

Do you think you’re going back to your normal self? Is there a normal self to come back to? Or is it more like it hasn’t gone anywhere but your perception of surrounding reality has shifted?

My life is as it always was, but after several of such experiences it now has different flavor.

It’s more like I take everything less seriously. existence, myself, my problems, and I draw much more joy from life.

[Breakingthewall]

3 hours ago, shree said:

It’s more like I take everything less seriously. existence, myself, my problems, and I draw much more joy from life.

For me it's different, i take everything more seriously because I perceive that I am the existence. On one hand, you are the immutable essence of reality, but on the other, a movement is taking place, a specific vibration moving in a certain direction. I try to capture that movement as deeply as possible, understand its nuances, and align its energies.

I know that ultimately one thing is equal to another, but relatively speaking, it isn't, and the relative game seems evolutionary, not restricted to this specific experience. The feeling is that there's continuity in this wave that's taking place, in your specific vibration, then you have to expand yourself, if not you will be contracted. 

[shree]

On 3/24/2025 at 10:03 PM, Breakingthewall said:

For me it's different, i take everything more seriously because I perceive that I am the existence. On one hand, you are the immutable essence of reality, but on the other, a movement is taking place, a specific vibration moving in a certain direction. I try to capture that movement as deeply as possible, understand its nuances, and align its energies.

I know that ultimately one thing is equal to another, but relatively speaking, it isn't, and the relative game seems evolutionary, not restricted to this specific experience. The feeling is that there's continuity in this wave that's taking place, in your specific vibration, then you have to expand yourself, if not you will be contracted. 

Yeah, it reminds me of the question I oftentimes ask myself:
If the process of enlightenment is so scary, wtf is so funny when you attain it?

(Just a rhetorical question.)