PE Mushrooms - God Realization Trip Report

[Nav]

Yesterday, I had my deepest trip report yet.

I took 1.2g of some seriously strong PE mushrooms (with 2 friends) and made the realization that "my" consciousness as a whole is God. That is all that exists. God is having this human experience to explore what he can create with his infinite creativity and power.  
It's always been there but we take our experience for granted. The experience felt solipsistic in nature. 

It was such a strong trip and I wanted it to be over at the time. Now that I have come to this profound realization, I can't help but miss the profundity of the experience. So profound, yet challenging due to the sheer intensity of the experience.

I'm dumbfounded about how to integrate this powerful experience. Any help is appreciated.

Summary:

• Well, today I realized I'm God. I'm all that exists. There is only me. No one else. God is love. God is creation itself. Respect God. The most intense experience of my life.
• Funny enough, I was expecting it to be a light and enjoyable trip - seriously undermining the dosage. I have done 2.75g of some other strain in the past and it was chaotic. Yet, I was able to walk around and talk to myself. This one, however, felt like 3.5g-4g. I was in no condition to walk. Only able to lay down and see what it has to show me - whether I liked it or not. 
• Right after consuming, after 20 minutes the visuals were coming intensely. I was sitting on a bench in a nearby park and saw the ground eating itself. I was surprised to know that 1.2g of PE could be this damn intense.
• I laid down on the grass with my friends - still not realizing what the fuck I was in for. At one point, I felt that mushrooms wanted me to go deep this time - but I thought to myself, "Please, not this time. I'm with my friends here. I don't want to lose my shit with them". It made me feel slightly uncomfortable but it went away - for a bit.
• It got cold so we came back home. The whole walk felt uncomfortable. I was in no shape to walk. All I wanted to do was lay down.
• I lay on my bed with my friends. After some time, the shrooms made me move my hands and the tracers were out of this world. The afterimage was so mesmerizing. It felt holy. My hands were moving themselves in a very majestic Way. 
• Then I was brought back again to the plan of mushrooms showing me something deep. This time, I had no choice. Either I could ignore and fight the experience and feel very uncomfortable (to the point I have a panic attack) OR I could just accept my fate and see what it has to show me.
• It was gentle with me. It was slowly nudging me in its direction - telling me to see and just hang on to my dear life. This experience shed light on the importance of surrendering. It is going to show you what it wants to show you whether you like it or not. You are at its mercy. At certain points, the experience got very intense, and as I was lying down with my eyes closed, my left hand was comforting me by caressing my face and my torso.
• As I was lying down on my bed, it suddenly hit me. My experience was fully encompassing. Complete oneness. This experience is all that exists and that precisely is God. You are God living this experience. And your consciousness is IT. It has been right under your nose all this time. But been too busy to see it. Your experience is divine. 
• This knowledge wasn't free. I was shown the sheer intensity of the experience. Felt like I was almost an inch away from losing my sanity. There were moments in which I felt as if I would get trapped in this mental head space forever. Or reality could be broken in any second. But I was being guided to not dwell on those thoughts and just hang tight. 
• Challenging moments made me want to change the experience, but I kept being brought back gently. Surrendering is important. You will be shown whether you like it or not. 
• We questioned what is love. And got the answer that love is creation itself. Love = God = Creation. Why? Because there's so much creativity to be manifested. There's so much potential. Infinite potential. (As I have come out of the trip, I realize that I don't have a deep understanding of why I wrote this.)
• It was a very bonding experience with my friends Mr. A and Ms. S. We hugged each other at the end for enduring this thunderstorm of an experience.
• Mr. A had an ego-death experience - he forgot who he was and was getting paranoid and confused about why he was there. Luckily, I was able to handle that situation. 
• Ms. S saw a white light during her closed-eye visuals. She knew if she walked over to that white light, there would be peace and something profound to be found there. But to reach that door, she would have to walk a lot and experience negative things that would come during the walk to the light. So she decided not to pursue it. And her experience wasn't as profound.
• After 6 hours, I was pretty much back to monkey mind, but with a very profound realization. 

Thank you for reading.  Any tips on integrating this experience are welcome. 

Edited March 17 by Nav

[Leo Gura]

Hooray! 

[OBEler]

O@Nav awesome report and congratulations!!

Now how are you going through life after such a profound event, what about other people and the relationship to them if you are god realized.

[Nav]

@OBEler @Leo Gura Thank you very much.

I honestly don't know yet. I'm still integrating the experience. But it has made a very positive impact.

Here are some notes from today. 

Post Trip: 

Seeing reality from this new lens made me cry tears of Joy a couple times. I broke up in tears multiple times today, reminiscing the experience from yesterday. How profound and intimate it was.. My God. 

Looking at the sky and seeing the beauty of this creation makes me feel ways I can't explain. 

I may be the only being at the center of reality and existence, but I don't feel alone one bit. Perhaps it's because I have not had experiences of nothingness and the feeling of being all alone (experiences as I've read), but this life is truly a masterpiece and that feeling of aloneness feels like a bastardization of the truth that I experienced.

I know my journey has just started. I just got a little glimpse. I have only scratched the surface. But oh boy does it feel significant.

I understand that this consciousness is all that exists, but it feels complete. The world around me may just be an illusion, but it's divinely beautiful. :')

I sometimes just kiss my hand in awe and out of Love towards reality. I have always done that but now the love has grown significantly more. It makes my heart melt just writing this. I am grateful for this life experience. It sure is a roller coaster.

Truly the best gift.

Special thanks to Leo. You have played an important part in my journey. 

[Leo Gura]

10 hours ago, Nav said:

The world around me may just be an illusion, but it's divinely beautiful.

Of course. Infinite Illusion is Infinite Beauty. People are just too stupid to see the genius of it.

Welcome to God.

Edited March 18 by Leo Gura

[Norbert Somogyi]

Thank you for the detailed report and congratulations. This sounds like something I wish to experience in the future, but not yet. 

Good luck with the integration!

[Nav]

@Norbert Somogyi Thank you, friend.

It's very interesting - yesterday, I was still a little disconnected from what I experienced. I got a little high on weed and it was brought back to me.

The present moment is me and I am the lamp that I'm looking at. I'm the entire room. We're both made of the same material. Certain moments I had no identity. My identity felt very detached from the present moment. Almost like a fiction.

Then I realized that the ego is like a cage that is stopping you from realizing you are God. You are God right now. Everything you are experiencing is exactly God. 

Best of luck on your journey. Namaste.

Edited March 19 by Nav
(Edited comments on the identity portion for more clarification)

[Nav]

After my trip, I had a feeling that the insight of God realization is going to significantly shape my future experiences.

For example, in future, if I take a psychedelic, the context of the experience itself has changed - so they are going to be novel. I'm excited and nervous about deconstructing everything.

Anyway, here's an update from yesterday night. I took about 25 mg of THC edibles that triggered something. Still integrating the experience.

March 18 - A deeper realization - Notes

• This is for you, ego: I just consumed 25mg THC and was listening to "An Advanced Explanation of God Realization" by Leo.
• While watching, I tapped into and merged with what felt like infinity. Everything looked like a construction in consciousness. My primal nature. There is only me. Everything is me. That lamp i look at is me and I am it. We are made of consciousness and this entire experience is made of consciousness - it's the source material.
• Your experience right now is in a field of consciousness. It has always been here, imagining new things. And that is God. God is purposely restricting himself - added ego on top to forget its true nature and living this life.
• I was in such a high state of consciousness that I tried making things summon. But, of course, nothing happened. So, I'm definitely restricted in this dream. 
• It felt like I had no identity. Just pure experience. When I was trying to remember my identity, it felt like a fiction. The opposite of oneness is ego. 
• It's like God is playing a hyper realistic Sims game. As if I am a character in a sandbox game that is operating in a certain structure and reality. 
• Because I am one with everything. This right in front of me is me playing myself an illusion. Not sure why exactly why this particular experience out of all.  Was there bias?
• If this illusion was bad to me, aka my ego's fears, would I still hold a profound positive perspective?
• Can't help but realize that I am responsible to construct my dream. At least the ego's actions. Reality would always have unexpected things, but i guess it's the nature of it. Don't know why. 
• But I have a question - Why exactly this? Why not any other way?
• Either Leo's video has triggered an Awakening within me or I am deceiving myself. I'm still not sure yet.. illusion? Or insanity? More work is needed.
• Another big question - Is this a collective dream that consciousness is experiencing? Do simultaneous dreams exist and are others having a conscious experience? Or is it all just part of the illusion? My insights so far are solipsistic in nature. 

Namaste.

Edited March 19 by Nav
grammar

[Yimpa]