How do deal with anger?

[manuel bon]

17 minutes ago, Yimpa said:

So let’s start by acknowledging anger without shame or judgment. And let’s allow ourselves to be angry if we do that, too. 

I agree! But my issue is not with the emotion itself, but the actions I do because I'm blinded by the anger.

[Yimpa]

Just now, manuel bon said:

But my issue is not with the emotion itself, but the actions I do because I'm blinded by the anger.

Yep, I would lash out at everyone I was close to. I had to dominate others to feel like I was in control. But I was completely out of control. There will come a point where the hurt is just too great to ignore, and that’s when you’ll be committed to making drastic changes. When that’ll happen for you, I can’t tell you. You will know for yourself. But you seem like you really do want to change, and that intention is already a good sign that that will happen to you when the time is ripe for you.

[Incognito]

Shadow work.

[gettoefl]

4 hours ago, manuel bon said:

But the actions you do because of anger do impact others

Anger directed this way is abuse and begets resistance and resentment.

Nobody is interested in or motivated by another person's anger.

Anger is sickness.

Get over it,

Deal with any problem from a place of peace.

Then others may consent to work on themselves.

[manuel bon]

6 minutes ago, gettoefl said:

Anger directed this way is abuse and begets resistance and resentment.

In which way do you direct it?

[manuel bon]

4 hours ago, Yimpa said:

Yep, I would lash out at everyone I was close to. I had to dominate others to feel like I was in control. But I was completely out of control. There will come a point where the hurt is just too great to ignore, and that’s when you’ll be committed to making drastic changes. When that’ll happen for you, I can’t tell you. You will know for yourself. But you seem like you really do want to change, and that intention is already a good sign that that will happen to you when the time is ripe for you.

Thank you❤️

[gettoefl]

18 hours ago, manuel bon said:

In which way do you direct it?

Its your wound and needs healing.

Meditation is one good method among many.

[Letho]

Hey @manuel bon, I get that man. Anger isn’t just about the moment, it’s a backlog of everything unfaced. Suppressing it just feeds it, indulging it just lets it run you. Integration is the way.

My brothers have massive tempers. For a long time, I didn’t realize I was absorbing their approach, mistaking aggression for strength. The real shift happened when I saw anger as a signal, not an identity. Once I stabilized self-value, it lost its grip.

I posted on this yesterday, how self-worth regulates emotions at the root. If that resonates, I can break it down in a way that applies here. Let me know.

[manuel bon]

@Letho thank you for sharing your story

yes, if you want to share your insights please do! thank you so much!!

[Letho]

@manuel bon Pm'd.

[hyruga]

If you have anger, postpone it or cancel it.

But you might be bullied. So you need to know how to balance.

[Ulax]

@manuel bon I struggle with this a lot too.

Honestly the best thing maybe for me is to do label objects in my enviornment. Ie start labelling “door”, “lock”, “window” etc.

Also I think concentration meditation would probs be helpful. Though, despite my best efforts, I struggle to do it well.

All the best bro. Hope it helps

Edited Friday at 05:42 AM by Ulax

[manuel bon]

@Ulax thank you!

all the best to you too!

[Chadders]

On 04/03/2025 at 3:44 PM, manuel bon said:

How to do it? 

I'm usually not angry, but when I am, I see that I have lots of suppressed anger ready to come out.

If I tell myself to calm down I suppress this emotion. I'm learning to be mindful and present with anger, but still when I'm angry I become like an animal, explosive and violent.

I need help.

You could try boxing as an outlet for anger